Dear Claire, what a horrible thing to do to you after losing your Mum.  Obviously it's very hard at the moment to send condolence cards but a phone call would have gone a long way.  Your husband shrugging at your upset is not nice and he should be more understanding of how hurt you are.  Men don't like getting in-between the women in their lives, they know that to side with one will alienate the others but you are grieving and he should stand up for you.  So what do you do?  Truly I don't know, but I can understand why you don't want to be involved anymore.  You should let them both know how hurt and bewildered you feel, tell your husband that he can take the shopping to his Mum, maybe go and get it as well.  Until you say how you feel they won't understand as they all sound very self centred.  Our Mums are precious, ignoring the loss of yours is not OK, ask your husband how he would feel if his Mum passed away and you and your family ignored that it had happened.  Sometimes we need to show our anger to get the point across, you don't have to shout  but laying the facts out should jolt them out of their apathy.  I'm so sorry for the loss of your Mum, I know how you are feeling, the pain is like no other, take care Claire and let us know how you get on.  Hugs your way, Carol x 

Dear Claire, what a horrible thing to do to you after losing your Mum.  Obviously it's very hard at the moment to send condolence cards but a phone call would have gone a long way.  Your husband shrugging at your upset is not nice and he should be more understanding of how hurt you are.  Men don't like getting in-between the women in their lives, they know that to side with one will alienate the others but you are grieving and he should stand up for you.  So what do you do?  Truly I don't know, but I can understand why you don't want to be involved anymore.  You should let them both know how hurt and bewildered you feel, tell your husband that he can take the shopping to his Mum, maybe go and get it as well.  Until you say how you feel they won't understand as they all sound very self centred.  Our Mums are precious, ignoring the loss of yours is not OK, ask your husband how he would feel if his Mum passed away and you and your family ignored that it had happened.  Sometimes we need to show our anger to get the point across, you don't have to shout  but laying the facts out should jolt them out of their apathy.  I'm so sorry for the loss of your Mum, I know how you are feeling, the pain is like no other, take care Claire and let us know how you get on.  Hugs your way, Carol x