Hi Debbie 

I’m sorry for all the pain you have gone through. I’m currently also going through this and just reading your post has made me feel that we all go through the same thing. My dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer is January. He lives in Portugal and I had just visited him at Christmas. He had severe reflex when he ate and constant indigestion, at the time I just thought he might need to go on a diet as he ate a lot of rich food and drank a fair bit of wine (Mediterranean diet). As the process of diagnosis went on they couldn’t figure out what type of tumour it was as they couldn’t get to it and it became increasingly frustrating as the Portuguese doctors didn’t tell us anything and we had no idea what was going on and what the future was looking like. About two weeks ago we found out it had spread to his stomach and he has gone down hill rapidly. As I’m writing this he is lying in his hospital bed next to me. I think the biggest shock was seeing him turn to skin and bone, to see him being unable to talk and to see him tired all the time, and yet he’s still got his sense of humour. 

I dont want want him to be suffering anymore but I don’t want him to be gone either. I am 21 and he will never get to see me get married or see my children 

Hi Debbie 

I’m sorry for all the pain you have gone through. I’m currently also going through this and just reading your post has made me feel that we all go through the same thing. My dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer is January. He lives in Portugal and I had just visited him at Christmas. He had severe reflex when he ate and constant indigestion, at the time I just thought he might need to go on a diet as he ate a lot of rich food and drank a fair bit of wine (Mediterranean diet). As the process of diagnosis went on they couldn’t figure out what type of tumour it was as they couldn’t get to it and it became increasingly frustrating as the Portuguese doctors didn’t tell us anything and we had no idea what was going on and what the future was looking like. About two weeks ago we found out it had spread to his stomach and he has gone down hill rapidly. As I’m writing this he is lying in his hospital bed next to me. I think the biggest shock was seeing him turn to skin and bone, to see him being unable to talk and to see him tired all the time, and yet he’s still got his sense of humour. 

I dont want want him to be suffering anymore but I don’t want him to be gone either. I am 21 and he will never get to see me get married or see my children 

Hi georgie21

Thank you for your post, I am so sorry to hear your Dad is suffering from this awful pancreatic cancer!

After lots of research I have discovered it is a very hard cancer to diagnosis and shows very little symptoms before spreading, which it spread to my husbands liver and for your dad his stomach! This is often too late for those who have it as like my husband no treatment was going to save him, his was very aggressive.

I am just over a year now from his passing and I still find it difficult how quick he went, cancer is an evil disease and takes the most beautiful people in our lives. My husband was a very brave man, he had very little time to come to terms with him knowing he was going to die! As for myself and my 25 year old son this was the most devastating news ever but we did our best to stay as strong as possible for him but we were crumbling inside with sadness, he was an amazing husband and father. He is truly missed.

Stay with your Dad as much as possible and shower him with love and comfort, and when the day comes he has to leave you be very proud of him as you know he will have tried his hardest to stay with you, I know how hard it is to watch the physical change in them especially for men. 

I will be thinking of you and I am sending a massive hug and love for you and the rest of your family.

Debbie xx