Oh Jules forgive my post on my site to you .....I am so sorry not to have known of your hubbies departure.  You know from the support you have given me how well I understand your current situation and my heart goes out to you.  My site tells of my joirney through this uncharted place you find yourself in.  It is difficult but you will come through.

All my thoughts and a big virtual hug

Ian x

Hi Ian

Just lovely to see your name appear on my thread and suspect its just as hard for you to post but I really appreciate the message.  It was a long three years for hubby and I take much comfort in the fact that he is now free from the clutches of his disease which took his happiness away.  I am surrounded by the love of my family and friends (and the ongoing support of virtuality buddies) and now, like you, my life must be lived to the best of my ability. Early days still but so many memories to cherish and share with others - a few late nights of 'story-telling' along the way.

Sending hugs and best wishes and hope all is well with you and Julie in your new life.  Jules x

Hi Annabel

Lovely to see your name crop up and hope your husband got the car out and managed his appointment and necessary supplies for the 'snow in'.  None of the white stuff in our neck of the woods so far, though was bitterly cold (windy too) when we took Zack out this morning.

Have not yet had the washing machine on (still need to read the instructions and will wait for a 'full load' !!). Another telephone engineer (trying to sort out intermittent Broadband - grrr) due tomorrow p.m, so will try and catch up with more paperwork(photocopying documents) whilst I am waiting.  Have now appointed legal representatives to deal with Probate (will be glad to hand it all over to professionals) and am back to work on Monday  so some sort of normal can be found. This coming weekend is, hopefully, to be a relaxing one (do possibly have builder coming to secure back of garden (broken fencing to become a wall) and then can rest a little easier security wise.

How are you keeping?  Hope little Ava doing well and your daughter enjoying being back at work.  Expect you will be getting cottages filled up again soon with half term hols and Easter just around the corner.  I am joining daughter and family for five days away in Dorset (holiday caravan park with all the necessary entertainment for the kiddies (big and small ha ha) beginning Easter Monday (we return just in time for son in law's birthday). Take care my virtual buddy. Peaceful thoughts and hugs coming your way. Jules x

I am glad you are busy and you got the legal stuff out of your hair, Well, no snow down here either - but its is nippy cold. Thinking about gardens already? Good luck on the back fence. There will be more strong winds coming along I am sure. We are okay - skittery about next week - but in my heart I think it will okay. Mum still plods along. I did a little video for us all of her singing. I am simply tired out - but tired out!!!

take care xx steven

Good morning Jules,

Well today is the last official day of my busmans holiday before, like you I return to work on Monday morning.  I know I will have a lot to try and deal with that day but I suspect it will be nothing compared to your return to work after the last few weeks.

There won't be much relaxing going on today as I have to dismantle the tv - sky - dvd - video - x box unit and prepare for the delivery of new lounge furniture while a hospice charity comes to collect the old units.There will then be a whole lot of dusting and hoovering but I still hope to get it all done shortly after lunch.  

I met up with someone from work for a coffee yesterday and it was good to have a bit a laugh and a catch up on what is and isn't happening at the hotel.  No surprises waiting for me as far as I know but time will tell.

Hope the new washer dryer is everything you hoped it would be although,  when you said earlier that you would read the instructions thoroughly before using it I had to smile because, as a man, the first instinct is to just turn it on and see what happens.  :p

All the best with hugs Jules.

Garf. xx

Good morning Jules,

Hope you are not snowed in. We had a little dusting last night just as it got dark but it's all gone this morning, much to my grandchildrens dissapiontment. Hope your enginer is able to sort your internet problems our for you. My cancer meeting last night was cancelled so I had an evening off, much to mrs B's delight. I bought her a small pack of owl stickers the other day and my son asked where she was going to put them. She replied "On your dad if he keeps annoying me". Now theres gratitude for you.

Glad you have now got your washer installed. I have every faith you will soon get the hang of it. It should make your life a lot easier. My grandson still keeps calling me Granddad Brian. Early next week he has to see the specialist and we will find out if the little guy has to have an operation or not.  Last Night I phoned my son and little one wanted to talk to me. He is writting a story for his school work and insisted on reading it to me over the phone. I was very imressed though he still has some way to go to get it finnished.

Sounds like you still have things to do this weekend with the builder and back fence as well. I can imagine part of you is reluctant to return to work while another part is looking forward to getting some normalitity back in  your life. I think you have coped very well and am glad you have the love of your family to help you.

Take care and will chat again soon. sending best wishes and kind thought for a peaceful weekend, Brian

GMorning Brian

yup we are the same - no snow at all!! In fact a fine morning - so its no good for your grandson to come here for snow men!! Lets hope he gets the all clear!! Two years ago our grandson had to go to the hospital - he is okay now - but he bowel problems brought on by gluten. Wierd or what??

Well, have a great day and enjoy every minute!

I am off to work = we have a new boss starting soon that sounds like Captain Mainwaring = yuk!!

Cheers 

Steven

I love your posts BTW

Hi Steve,

Thanks for the reply and thought about my grandson. Talking about gluten, My son is very allergic to any gluten based products but Luckily both Asda and Sainsburys now keep a good range of gluten free products. Even if someone gives him a knife that has been in contact with gluten based products, he has big trouble with his bowels so can understand your grandsons problems all to well. Hope your day is not too tireing and that you and your wife have a good weekend, best wishes and kind thought bieng sent your way, Brian.

Hi Steven

The back fence has been a disgrace for some time but other things understandably were coming first.  Now I need to get things in order.  Day to day stuff does not go away!! 

Upcoming appointments (and the waiting for them) always bring stress along with them and I do hope all will be well. 

New set of forms to fill in, this time for Mum's care needs.  Should be easier this time (went through it all just over a year ago so at least I know what I am facing).

Hope you and Anne have a peaceful weekend. Jules x

well, still having issues with internet (have already  replied to your post but it disappeared so am having another go!). Am delighted to report that new washing machine working a treat and very very quiet! Awaiting arrival of 2nd Broadband engineer (before 6 apparently though they were several hours late the last time (so far no extra payments demanded though it could be me asking for  a refund in the future!!!). The call centre for the supplier is doing my head in as I still do not have an answer to the real problem (no access to account details because password not known (hubby was not one to share!!!) and there answer is to send another engineer to check the line(which has already been reported as fine!!!).  To add insult to injury they have asked me to fill out an on line survey as regards their service - have put it on the back-burner for fear or 'letting rip inappropriately' ha ha.

Hope your new furniture arrives as planned and am sure the Hospice will be delighted with your donations.  Seems like an early Spring cleaning bug has begun.  My retail therapy has extended now to a new doormat (no jokes here please;) and a new bin which will fit underneath the sink area(thus freeing up floor space in my very minute kitchen).

Fox has just wandered into the garden and polished off bird food so now have some disgruntled feathered friends flying to and fro wondering where their bread has gone.

Spent several hours photo copying this morning in readiness for next Legal appointment and then another hour 'shredding' hubby's old work material (sensitive but the company did not want it returned so am following instructions!!).  Doing a little something every day is the only way I am finding.

Fingers crossed will be out this evening and then tomorrow will see builder back and providing materials delivered could have new back wall by the days end.  Actually beginning to think I am going back to work for a rest (though now have forms through to continue dealing with Mum's care home fees) but also see GP on Tuesday to she can see how I am doing (hoping this will be the last of these as the stress caused by another GP (out of hours attached to the surgery) not ticking a vital box has meant delays.  Still we are moving ahead again now.

Hope you and MRs G have a peaceful weekend in your newly furnished lounge. Take care  Jules x

Hi Brian

Well BT Engineer has been and so far so good!! Needed new wall socket as wiring in old one was causing intereference on the line which was causing 'gaps' in signal.  No financial outlay required so another job sorted out. New washing machine in use (not as technophobic as I thought) so fingers crossed. Its so quiet I had to check it was on!!!

No snow here at all, just drizzle this morning but a lovely bright afternoon.  Plenty of forms now to fill in for Mum but once again at least things are in motion and I am chipping away at them.(plus I have had practice two years ago - hopefully a better outcome this time).

Am shortly going out for my usual Friday night social and as my friend had a mini win last week things are looking up.

Hope you and MrsB have a lovely relaxing weekend and you are not currently wearing lots of owl stickers.  Take care  Jules x

Hi Jules,

Yes the grief rollercoaster is certainly a rough ride and I am keeping you in my thoughts.  Glad to read that legalities are getting finalised, although still fail to see how such mistakes could be made.  I hope you get some luck with your internet.  Many years ago I had a connection problem that the provider just failed to sort out despite my many calls and engineers booked; so in the end I changed supplier - perhaps that may be an option for you if all else fails.  Good luck and take care of yourself.  Hope x

Hi Jules,

Yes the grief rollercoaster is certainly a rough ride and I am keeping you in my thoughts.  Glad to read that legalities are getting finalised, although still fail to see how such mistakes could be made.  I hope you get some luck with your internet.  Many years ago I had a connection problem that the provider just failed to sort out despite my many calls and engineers booked; so in the end I changed supplier - perhaps that may be an option for you if all else fails.  Good luck and take care of yourself.  Hope x

Evening Hope

Just returned from my Friday night social outing (still poor but relaxed).  Engineer has sorted connection problems by replacing  wall socket and getting rid of interference on the line.  It took him all of half hour and thankfully was 'free'. Had a productive day indoors (poor electronic shredder was working overtime and the printer was also kept busy copying documents ready for Probate representative next week (will be going again soon to do the same for all the documents social services finance guys need in regards Mum'shome care costs.  Never a dull moment!

Have daughter and grandchildren round in the morning as well as a friend popping in for coffee (builder now coming Sunday to put up new wall) and then its back to work on Monday which will help me get back into 'normal' routine.

Am currently being a bit naughty with a large hot chocolate steaming beside me (well coffee might keep me awake.)

Hope everything is okay with you and sending peaceful thoughts for the weekend.  Enjoy. Jules x

Hi Jules,  so glad the engineer has sorted out your internet problems and that you are able to stay online with us without any problems now.  Wishing you all the best for your return to work tomorrow. I'm sure it will be strange in many ways, I remember finding it odd returning to routine, as life was going on the same when mine had changed so much, however it was also good to keep occupied.  Take care.  Hope x

Hi Jules thinking of you take care lol george

Hi Jules,

Just a quick message to wish you well on first day back. Im still having issues with ease of use of this site so take advantage when I get in. You seem to be doing well and from my own experience you are doing all the right things. Its good to keep yourself busy: especially in the evenings.  Do remember to collect the 2000 pounds government hand out to all widows. You have to ask for it, they scandoously dont just give it.

Lots of kind thoughts and a big virtual hug

Ian x

Thanks George, Everyone on the forum has been great and I am finding it very humbling to have so many lovely people, who are going through so much themselves, looking out for me too.

Hope the docs have been able to make you a little more comfortable and give Ria a pat from me.  Take care. Hugs  Jules  x

Thanks Ian, it was quite a slow and easy return (staff wanting to catch up and those I had not already seenduring previous 'drop ins' having a chat) as Monday reasonably quiet.   Another  hurdle crossed and so far am managing quite well (bet then no one has upset me yet ha ha). 

As to the hands up re Widow Benefit our Probate rep.(now fully appointed and visiting again tomorrow to collect paperwork) also mentioned it and it is already through along with the bereavement benefit which I get weekly for a year. Am using it to get some of the important things done that have been on hold for a few years so come the Summer should be more secure in our back garden!

Hope you and Julie enjoyed your wedding day (not doubt feels like a bit of distant memory now) and you are enjoying your new life together - are the dog and cat talking yet?

Sending hugs and good wishes. Hugs  Jules x