Oh Jules forgive my post on my site to you .....I am so sorry not to have known of your hubbies departure.  You know from the support you have given me how well I understand your current situation and my heart goes out to you.  My site tells of my joirney through this uncharted place you find yourself in.  It is difficult but you will come through.

All my thoughts and a big virtual hug

Ian x

Hi Ian

Just lovely to see your name appear on my thread and suspect its just as hard for you to post but I really appreciate the message.  It was a long three years for hubby and I take much comfort in the fact that he is now free from the clutches of his disease which took his happiness away.  I am surrounded by the love of my family and friends (and the ongoing support of virtuality buddies) and now, like you, my life must be lived to the best of my ability. Early days still but so many memories to cherish and share with others - a few late nights of 'story-telling' along the way.

Sending hugs and best wishes and hope all is well with you and Julie in your new life.  Jules x

Good morning Jules,

Sorry have been absent for a day or so but have been so busy. Monday I was out to my three hour cancer meeting to do with the new Macmillan Horizon Centre being built in Brighton. As my car was problematical I went by bus so was out for nearly six hours. But well worth while. I also found out my PSA has only risen slightly during the past six months. It still only 0.89 which is very good. Funny thing was when I was at the cancer meeting I met my oncologist who recognised me and asked how I was, so was able to update him.

Yesterday got my car fixed; it was a sensor that was the problem. Cost me a fair bit but needed to get it fixed. Did more walking than I have done for ages and when I finally got home felt absolutely done in. So today I am playing catch up and taking things easy.

Sounds like you have a lot going on today, with visit by internet people, washing machien delivery, and little Zack to have fun with as well. I was sorry to hear you got upset when the car was taken away but can well understand it for it's another little bit of the past you shared with your hubby and probably have happy memories of trips out you had together in the car. I hope your meeting went well yesterday with social services regarding your mother.

While walking around the shops yesterday killing time while they ran diagnostics on my car, I found a lovely owl cushion which was the last one they had so bought it for Mrs B who was very pleased with it. My nut shop was closed as they are moving round the corner so wasnt able to buy any nuts.

Well I have rambled enough for today. Take care Jules, Best wishes and kind thoughts being sent your way, Brian.

Good evening Garf

Well, its been quite a day. Both engineer and washer/dryer were booked for a.m.delivery -both turned up at 2.30ish!!!! (just as well it was pouring with rain and I did not want/need to go out.  Washing machine now in situ and once I have read the booklet will set to work!  The internet has been temporarily re-vamped on old router but new router required. Engineer was here two hours as the new router he had with him just would not work with old settings - nothing is ever straightforward these days.  Now need another engineer to come out who apparently will bring all network info with him (to be honest its all beyond me but hubby never shared his password (why would he when you are supposed to protect it!!).  Anyway for now its fingers crossed.

On the plus side the legalities regarding registration of hubby's death have been  partially rectified so we can move forward with new death certificate once they are sent out (you could not write a book about the problems two 'professionals' have caused- though perhaps I should ha ha).  Time for formal complaint will be later as no one should have had to go through the added stress this has brought to the family.

Zack has been a little treasure today and is now tucked up and fast asleep and will be picked up tomorrow after elder brother has been dropped to school. His hospital appointment was inconclusive as he did not 'rock' during the sleep clinic but was rather upset by it all - am sure dinner out with Mum and Dad will help!

Hope Mother in Law was happy with the coffee table and that you get safe delivery of new furniture on Friday - seems like a good Spring Clean is afoot in your place and am sure your and Mrs G will be very pleased once its complete.

Well whilst a little peace is available I will put my meal on and try and catch up with other mail.

Take care and try and get a bit of R&R before your return to work.  Hugs  Jules

Hi Kathy

Washer dryer in and ready to go (when I have read the blurb that goes with it!!).  Interenet has temporary repar until new router with different engineer comes out (the joys of switching from hubby's name has lead to password issues like you would not believe but at least I have access at present.).  Both appointments booked for am, both arrived after 2 pm but as I had Zack to keep me amused no real problem.

Hope to have appointed probate solicitors by end of week but still plenty of stuff to keep me amused (not sure where I will find the time to return to work but am going back on Monday anyhow).  Glad you are also beginning to get somewhere with the legal side of things too.  I am actually Executor for hubby but plan on passing the buck so to speak as really do not need the added stress of doing all the running around.  With hopefully all the necessary boxes ticked now, we are able to move forward a little more.

The little ones certainly never fail to bring smiles and Zack has been as good as gold today and is now tucked up in bed and I am planning my evening meal in peace (hope I have not spoken too soon ha ha).

Take care forum friend.Hugs across the miles  Jules

Hi Brian

No apologies needed as you certainly carrying out good work with regards to cancer charity and it was nice that you saw your own oncologist and were able to tell him your good PSA news.  Am sure you and he were delighted with latest results.

Mrs B is turning into an owl sanctuary for 'all things related' but bet she was chufffed to bits with the new cushion.  I am planning on re-adopting Cobweb in memory of hubby in April so our 'adoption' will continue.

At the local market a couple of weeks ago they had a display of owls from local sanctuary and was happy to donate to such a good cause.  They are beautiful to look at and bring enormous pleasure to their carers as well as those in the wild.

Well feeling pretty jaded now so will get away to a meal and maybe an early night.

Kind thoughts and peace sent back to you and MrsB. Jules

 Sorry my PC crashed so out of touch will now get back in touch take care kind regards george .

Hi George

Technology is great when its working.  Hope your PC stays fixed for you.  I too have been having issues with the internet, one engineer down, one to go!!

Do hope your doctor has been able to help with your pain and that you are more comfortable. I expect Ria is keeping you company along the way. Take good care.  Jules x

Good morning Jules,

Sorry I haven't been around much this last week. We have been empty with the cottages but busy with all the catch up things we have to do when we are empty. Now this morning we have 6 inches of snow and my husband is outside clearing it away in order to get the car out in the hopes of getting into town for his gp appointment and one or two comestubles. 

I hope you are well and managing to fit in the reflecting moments for yourself within the company of visits from friends and family. So glad you got yourself a new washing machine and hope its working well. At least if you get snow like we have you don't have to worry about going out with the laundry. One day we might be able to pm again and I look forward to that oppotunity. 

Sending lots of hugs 

Annabel. xx

Hi Annabel

Lovely to see your name crop up and hope your husband got the car out and managed his appointment and necessary supplies for the 'snow in'.  None of the white stuff in our neck of the woods so far, though was bitterly cold (windy too) when we took Zack out this morning.

Have not yet had the washing machine on (still need to read the instructions and will wait for a 'full load' !!). Another telephone engineer (trying to sort out intermittent Broadband - grrr) due tomorrow p.m, so will try and catch up with more paperwork(photocopying documents) whilst I am waiting.  Have now appointed legal representatives to deal with Probate (will be glad to hand it all over to professionals) and am back to work on Monday  so some sort of normal can be found. This coming weekend is, hopefully, to be a relaxing one (do possibly have builder coming to secure back of garden (broken fencing to become a wall) and then can rest a little easier security wise.

How are you keeping?  Hope little Ava doing well and your daughter enjoying being back at work.  Expect you will be getting cottages filled up again soon with half term hols and Easter just around the corner.  I am joining daughter and family for five days away in Dorset (holiday caravan park with all the necessary entertainment for the kiddies (big and small ha ha) beginning Easter Monday (we return just in time for son in law's birthday). Take care my virtual buddy. Peaceful thoughts and hugs coming your way. Jules x

I am glad you are busy and you got the legal stuff out of your hair, Well, no snow down here either - but its is nippy cold. Thinking about gardens already? Good luck on the back fence. There will be more strong winds coming along I am sure. We are okay - skittery about next week - but in my heart I think it will okay. Mum still plods along. I did a little video for us all of her singing. I am simply tired out - but tired out!!!

take care xx steven

Good morning Jules,

Well today is the last official day of my busmans holiday before, like you I return to work on Monday morning.  I know I will have a lot to try and deal with that day but I suspect it will be nothing compared to your return to work after the last few weeks.

There won't be much relaxing going on today as I have to dismantle the tv - sky - dvd - video - x box unit and prepare for the delivery of new lounge furniture while a hospice charity comes to collect the old units.There will then be a whole lot of dusting and hoovering but I still hope to get it all done shortly after lunch.  

I met up with someone from work for a coffee yesterday and it was good to have a bit a laugh and a catch up on what is and isn't happening at the hotel.  No surprises waiting for me as far as I know but time will tell.

Hope the new washer dryer is everything you hoped it would be although,  when you said earlier that you would read the instructions thoroughly before using it I had to smile because, as a man, the first instinct is to just turn it on and see what happens.  :p

All the best with hugs Jules.

Garf. xx

Good morning Jules,

Well today is the last official day of my busmans holiday before, like you I return to work on Monday morning.  I know I will have a lot to try and deal with that day but I suspect it will be nothing compared to your return to work after the last few weeks.

There won't be much relaxing going on today as I have to dismantle the tv - sky - dvd - video - x box unit and prepare for the delivery of new lounge furniture while a hospice charity comes to collect the old units.There will then be a whole lot of dusting and hoovering but I still hope to get it all done shortly after lunch.  

I met up with someone from work for a coffee yesterday and it was good to have a bit a laugh and a catch up on what is and isn't happening at the hotel.  No surprises waiting for me as far as I know but time will tell.

Hope the new washer dryer is everything you hoped it would be although,  when you said earlier that you would read the instructions thoroughly before using it I had to smile because, as a man, the first instinct is to just turn it on and see what happens.  :p

All the best with hugs Jules.

Garf. xx

well, still having issues with internet (have already  replied to your post but it disappeared so am having another go!). Am delighted to report that new washing machine working a treat and very very quiet! Awaiting arrival of 2nd Broadband engineer (before 6 apparently though they were several hours late the last time (so far no extra payments demanded though it could be me asking for  a refund in the future!!!). The call centre for the supplier is doing my head in as I still do not have an answer to the real problem (no access to account details because password not known (hubby was not one to share!!!) and there answer is to send another engineer to check the line(which has already been reported as fine!!!).  To add insult to injury they have asked me to fill out an on line survey as regards their service - have put it on the back-burner for fear or 'letting rip inappropriately' ha ha.

Hope your new furniture arrives as planned and am sure the Hospice will be delighted with your donations.  Seems like an early Spring cleaning bug has begun.  My retail therapy has extended now to a new doormat (no jokes here please;) and a new bin which will fit underneath the sink area(thus freeing up floor space in my very minute kitchen).

Fox has just wandered into the garden and polished off bird food so now have some disgruntled feathered friends flying to and fro wondering where their bread has gone.

Spent several hours photo copying this morning in readiness for next Legal appointment and then another hour 'shredding' hubby's old work material (sensitive but the company did not want it returned so am following instructions!!).  Doing a little something every day is the only way I am finding.

Fingers crossed will be out this evening and then tomorrow will see builder back and providing materials delivered could have new back wall by the days end.  Actually beginning to think I am going back to work for a rest (though now have forms through to continue dealing with Mum's care home fees) but also see GP on Tuesday to she can see how I am doing (hoping this will be the last of these as the stress caused by another GP (out of hours attached to the surgery) not ticking a vital box has meant delays.  Still we are moving ahead again now.

Hope you and MRs G have a peaceful weekend in your newly furnished lounge. Take care  Jules x

Hi Jules,

I am glad to read that an engineer has managed to sort out your internet connection problems.  The issues you have had with the company who are supposed to be looking after one of their customers is unfortunately all too common these days.  For them to then ask you to fill out a customer satisfaction survey is just classic!  I would love to read what you put.

My furniture delivery went - shall I say - not according to plan.  It was arranged for Friday morning so by 10am I was sat in a living room with electrical equipment strewn accross the carpet and boxes full of files and photo albums and all the stuff you accumulate over the years.  It seems that because two of the four pieces of furniture weren't in stock they decided not to deliver any of it.  And to add to that they also decided not to tell me.  After speaking to them I got them to deliver the tv unit and coffee table that they did have which arrived four hours later with a broken shelf.  The other pieces will arrive, apparently on Tuesday.  I contacted Claire who also has a great deal of experience in dealing with stupidity and she replied with a statement that read, "if only stupidity was painful!" 

Rant over and now it's time to get ready for a shopping trip.

Take care.

Garf. xx

Hi Garf

Sorry to hear you too have had problems surrounding your furniture delivery and do hope both the broken piece and the rest of your order is in good order when Tuesday comes - why does everything have to take two attempts!!.

Well the weather put paid to my new wall getting started yesterday so have provisional date for next weekend (he is fitting it in, inbetween his day job (son in law's friend so am happy to wait) and the weather needs to be 'reasonable'.

Beautiful here this morning and though am watching Murray(amazing match so far) whilst waiting for a phone call, will be off out as soon as I can for a good walk to blow the cobwebs away.

Enjoy the rest of the day and hope return to work will not be too 'annoying'.  Take care. Jules x

Good morning Jules,

Hope you have not got too cold on your Sunday morning walk. Although it's bright and sunny here in Sussex, the wind is very cold. So pleased you have got your internet problem sorted. Funily enough, some years ago I had  exactly the same problem, even the same supplier who had been insisting for weeks there wasnt a problem. Am now with another Provider.

Just wanted to wish you well for your return to work tommorow, another step on your journey. I had all this written out once and dont know what happened, if I pressed the wrong button or what but I lost it all much to my disgust. I am glad thing are progressing with regard to your mothers situation and best luck with the form filling, something I hate doing. I find some things they write on the forms are unclear and could have several different meanings so I will be thinking of you.

Take care and I hope you have a relaxing and peaceful day after your walk. Best wishes being sent your way, Brian.

Love and best wishes for work tomorrow Jules x

Hi Jules,

I just want to mirror what Jo has said and sharing her belief that your colleagues have no doubt been and will continue to look after you after your return to work.

My return has been somewhat hectic which I expected but I will have to have a word with the guys who were taking care of things in my abscence as problems were caused that didn't need to be there.  Hey Ho!

Take care friend.

Garf. xx

Hir Brian

Had a long walk yesterday morning visiting my usual Farmer's Market (have a new cheese to try - goats cheese with garlic and nettles!!) and did a bit of shopping before having a French Manicure as a little treat!(my excuse is that this will protect my nails upon return to work ha ha).

First day back was fine; everyone as expected very supportive (protective) and not too busy so able to 'find my feet' with new promotions etc.  My friend who does not work Mondays met me afterwards and we went to try a new teashop (named The Wonky Teapot).  It was their first day and though a bit at sixes and sevens still enjoyed our natter over tea and toasted teacake. Everything felt strangely surreal but am sure once back into usual routine it will be like it was before and its another hurdle breached so to speak.

Will visit Mum tomorrow morning after my GP appointment and then seeing 'Mr Probate' in the early evening when hopefully he will take all the notes/paperwork he requires to take things forward (not exactly a restful day off but handy to be able to fit things in when not working).

Take care and all the very best to you and MRs B.  Kind thoughts Jules x

Thanks Kathy, all went okay and its good to be back into some sort of weekly routine again and dealing with 'normal' daily stuff.  Pretty chilly today but dry and having enjoyed snack with my friend after work am now cocooned in front of the fire with yet another cuppa and trying to decide on what to have for dinner (treated myself to some 'osterich' (apologies for any veggies out there) and fish when I went shopping over the weekend so spoilt for choice.

Hope all is well with you and the family and its not too hot to be enjoying the outside space (my daughter very envious that you have koalas close by (they got engaged whilst on holiday in Australia (staying with friends) and she did the usual tourist thing of holding one and has been smitten ever since!

Take care and thanks again for your support.  Big hugs  Jules