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Hard to accept - have the all clear for anal cancer. I should be happy but can't get my head around it not being there anymore. Has anyone else felt this way?

Kelly1968
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Hi I was diagnosed with with anal cancer march last year I’ve had a colostomy and had radiotherapy and chemotherapy I’ve recently had my results back and it’s all clear I should be happy I thank god I’m still here but in my can’t get my head around it’s not there anymore and I think too it’s gonna be bad news every time I go to hospital appointments i have anxiety and depression and dread the next hospital appointment do others feel this way 

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  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Kelly, Paul here. I had rectal cancer 3.5 yrs ago, had it cut out in the form of a low anterior resection with a temporary ileostomy for 12 months. Was told they would reverse it in time and all would be back to normal. 1yr after got it reversed and its been terrible and still is. No bowl control, urgency, constant bathroom visits. I wish and have asked for another bag. Yours being anal cancer I assume you have a permanent colostomy, and if so have no choice to get it removed. If that is the case believe me its the most comfortable and manageable treatment you have had. In terms of not having a rectum/anus it is a cosmetic issue only, who knows only you and your partner or close friends. I had a psychological block when I was told I was getting a temporary one, now I wish it had been permanent. Get  on with life, to he'll with everything else. I am pestering surgeon to put mine back on ,I'm really struggling. In a way I envy your situation compared to mine, you will have more control of your life than I have now. Mentally get to grips with it  time is a good healer.

    Regards Paul.

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  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi Kelly, Paul here. I had rectal cancer 3.5 yrs ago, had it cut out in the form of a low anterior resection with a temporary ileostomy for 12 months. Was told they would reverse it in time and all would be back to normal. 1yr after got it reversed and its been terrible and still is. No bowl control, urgency, constant bathroom visits. I wish and have asked for another bag. Yours being anal cancer I assume you have a permanent colostomy, and if so have no choice to get it removed. If that is the case believe me its the most comfortable and manageable treatment you have had. In terms of not having a rectum/anus it is a cosmetic issue only, who knows only you and your partner or close friends. I had a psychological block when I was told I was getting a temporary one, now I wish it had been permanent. Get  on with life, to he'll with everything else. I am pestering surgeon to put mine back on ,I'm really struggling. In a way I envy your situation compared to mine, you will have more control of your life than I have now. Mentally get to grips with it  time is a good healer.

    Regards Paul.

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