I can’t believe my daughter is gone forever.

My precious 27 year old daughter passed away 15 days ago. She had a very aggressive form of adenocarcina which started in the colon and spread to her lungs and spine. We tried everything to find a way to slow or stop this monster. She fought so hard and suffered horribly. Due to what the hospice nurses said was a metabolic disorder her body would not absorb pain medication properly. Her breathing at the end was exceptionally labored. I held her hand to my face and told her how much i loved her. Now i feel so anxious, afraid and anguished that she is gone forever. She was kind and loving to all and brought shear joy to my life. How do i go on? I have one other adult child who is very different from me and is not supportive of me. I am a widow of 9 years now as well.

Kelley

Parents
  • Dear Kelley,

    I lost my 29 year old daughter on 18th December to a rare aggressive salivary gland cancer! I'm struggling so much and came across your story of loss which struck me so hard in its similarities .

    My beautiful daughter was so unbelievably fit and healthy but this aggressive disease took her piece by piece. She underwent surgery initially to remive the tumour and get lower jaw and was beginning to get her life back after 12months when a scan showed a spread to her lungs and spine.

    Like you we tried everything we could as there seemed to be so little infornation out there. Like your daughter our anazing girl struggled so much with pain when it was discovered she was not absorbing oral meds properly and needed a syringe driver for her last 6 weeks.

    The pain of watching someone you love go through such agony is unbearable, you feel powerless to help when as a mother it is what you have always dine.

    I notice your post was from the start of 2018 so I dearly hope you have found some peace and that better, happier memories fill your thoughts.

    Much love 

    Katen

  • Dear Karen,

    I was rereading my thread from last year as it is the middle of the night and I can't sleep once again. It has been just over one year since my beloved Caroline please and I continue to think of her constantly. I Miss her terribly. I saw again that you lost your beautiful daughter not that long ago and was wondering how you are doing? It is such a profoundly devastating experience to lose a child that we need all the support we can get. I hope you are managing as well as can be expected. Would love to hear more about your daughter. 

    Sincerely 

    Kelley 

Reply
  • Dear Karen,

    I was rereading my thread from last year as it is the middle of the night and I can't sleep once again. It has been just over one year since my beloved Caroline please and I continue to think of her constantly. I Miss her terribly. I saw again that you lost your beautiful daughter not that long ago and was wondering how you are doing? It is such a profoundly devastating experience to lose a child that we need all the support we can get. I hope you are managing as well as can be expected. Would love to hear more about your daughter. 

    Sincerely 

    Kelley 

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