Hi there,

I've never posted on here before, I've read loads but for some reason I've never written. Maybe denial as writing down what I've gone through makes it real and painful to try and accept.

your post really resonated with me and I can 100% relate to everything that you wrote. It's a physical pain every day. I sometimes forget and then I remember my Dad is gone and it's like someone has punched me in the stomach.

My Dad died of prostate cancer 3 weeks ago. He was only 70, I'm only 35. It's far too soon for either of us to live our lives without our dads by our side. I just cannot accept that he has gone and I will never see or speak to him again. My life and my world feel like they have shattered. 

we were so close, I'm definitely a daddy's girl and always will be. He was a talented, funny, caring, beautiful human and watching him decline so rapidly into someone I didn't recognise and seeing the suffering he was in was nearly as painful as losing him.

I, like you, was with him right until the end, I held his hand as he took his last breath. Nothing in life can prepare you for that moment. How can life be there 1 second and gone the next?

I cry constantly. I miss him so much it hurts. I'm not sure how I'll survive without him but I can hear him willing me on and telling me that it's going to be okay. His voice is still there, I hear it every day and it's honestly the only thing getting me through the day. 
 

im so so sad, my heart is heavy and I don't care about anything just now. I find it hard to function or even get out of bed. I guess it would be nice to connect or speak to someone who had experienced this too. I'm not sure what else to do.

Hope it's ok to respond to this comment. I think yours is the first where the death is so recent. My amazing Dad passed away just   6 days ago. My mother left him over ten years ago, and I chose to stay with him (after just leaving uni) and lost contact with my mum, so I'm a Dad's girl through and through and I just don't know how to get through this.

I have a two year old daughter and amazing as my partner is, I want to run from my responsibilities and revert to being a child having Dad look after me. I'm also really scared of one day not crying. This week I've been waking at about 2am and going downstairs but this morning I woke and didn't start crying first thing and I felt guilty. My Dad would hate that I'm crying and would be telling me to pull myself together for the sake of my little girl, but I can't right now. 
 

im getting married next year, and I don't know how to do it without my dad walking me down the aisle. I wish I showed him my wedding dress but that would have been admitting I'm scared he'd maybe not be there. 
 

im so sorry as it was not cancer that my dad passed from, but heart failure and with covid etc we didn't realise he even had it until about 5 weeks before he went. He moved in with us for 2 weeks then was in hospital for 2...I never expected him to not come out. I was looking at houses with an additional bedroom! 
 

just after advice from people about coping in the very early stages. I have a brother but he doesn't live nearby, so all the technicalities of funeral arrangements are on me (and my partner) and I'm scared that if I get caught up in that, I'll not give myself time to think of him as he should be thought of. X
 

Hope it's ok to respond to this comment. I think yours is the first where the death is so recent. My amazing Dad passed away just   6 days ago. My mother left him over ten years ago, and I chose to stay with him (after just leaving uni) and lost contact with my mum, so I'm a Dad's girl through and through and I just don't know how to get through this.

I have a two year old daughter and amazing as my partner is, I want to run from my responsibilities and revert to being a child having Dad look after me. I'm also really scared of one day not crying. This week I've been waking at about 2am and going downstairs but this morning I woke and didn't start crying first thing and I felt guilty. My Dad would hate that I'm crying and would be telling me to pull myself together for the sake of my little girl, but I can't right now. 
 

im getting married next year, and I don't know how to do it without my dad walking me down the aisle. I wish I showed him my wedding dress but that would have been admitting I'm scared he'd maybe not be there. 
 

im so sorry as it was not cancer that my dad passed from, but heart failure and with covid etc we didn't realise he even had it until about 5 weeks before he went. He moved in with us for 2 weeks then was in hospital for 2...I never expected him to not come out. I was looking at houses with an additional bedroom! 
 

just after advice from people about coping in the very early stages. I have a brother but he doesn't live nearby, so all the technicalities of funeral arrangements are on me (and my partner) and I'm scared that if I get caught up in that, I'll not give myself time to think of him as he should be thought of. X
 

It's very very early. Take each day as it comes. Your going through everything we all have, guilt, inability to think ahead and why would you , it's traumatic, concentrate on now that's all you can do xxx