My husband passed June fourth. And I have been trying to cope. Ive been trying to keep busy, but at every turn come these feelings of guilt, loss, yearning ,and this hollow feeling in my stomach doesnt go away. I know its only been to weeks.
hi you must be devastated two of my friends have lost there husbands and i no they are in pain but they are back at work and hiding the grief one of them looks ill i can see in her eyes the torment but it is a very private thing to some people. i work in a place where i look after dying people but it is so different when it is your own... i recentley lost my mum and just cannot belive it my heart hurts so much my dad is still here and they were inseperable he is really struggling i am drinking more and more to cope just want her back.
Iam sorry to hear that you are also hurting so. My daughter just gave me a book "The Courage to Grieve" by Judy Tatelbaum. I am going to read it hopefully it will help.
Hi Angela, Things do get better, one day at a time. They say time is a great healer.... I don't know but every day I get stronger. If someone had told me 7.5 months ago how much better I am at handling things now I would have said they were bonkers. But it is true.... I think there are a lot of stages I know I have gone through but am now in a "good" place. Take care Kathy x
I am further down the grieving process than you as my hubby died in January. Those early weeks were filled with doubts/fears/what if's (actually the list is pretty endless). I am now moving forward slowly and do not expect too much of myself any more. Have learned to take it a step at a time and drawer strength from those around me. Today it is I think much harder for my adult children and my thoughts are with them as they grieve for their Dad as this is their first without him.
Time heals and wonderful memories of time spent together is forever within our hearts so that you can carry them with you. Hugs Jules54
i lost my partner 7th of april and its see very had to cope as every one say keeping busy helps. i have the same feelings of guilt and loss and feels like my heart has been ripped out its going to take some time befor the pain get easyer .spending time with family and friend helps.I still cry every day and still cant beleave she has gone. im really sorry for your loss theres always some one on here to talk to . trev
I lost my Mum last Wednesday and I am strugglng to accept it. My Dad is broken. Him and Mum were also inseperable. He has lost his soul mate. I am consumed with grief but also consumed with worry for my Dad. Will he ever feel 'normal' again ? I know its such early days but I can't stand the thought of him living the rest of his life in misery. I am praying that further along in this nightmare of a journey he will be able to smile again.
It is helpful to know other people's experiences and how they are coping. Kathy, so glad you are now in a better place. I wish that for my Dad too. Jo x
Hi ,Angela , I lost my husband 26th April after 30 years married , after a short illness. I was totally numb the first few weeks and didn't feel anything . This has worn off now , I quite liked the numbness it was like a protection. I find even simple things a huge challenge still , it took me two months to fill a simple form in. I have realised now it is going to be a long road to feeling better , and am taking baby steps eg put air in my tyres for the first time ever and felt really proud I had managed that (challenge of the day) . I find weekends more difficult as I can see friends during the week but they have their partners home at weekends, so then I realise how lonely this new life is . Like jules54 I have stopped expecting too much of myself .
Hi I lost my mum 15 month ago it seems like yesterday it's still very raw and hurts like mad I never actually thought you could have a broken Hart but boy I know now I wish it would start to mend I feel ill and depressed all the time I can't go out I have panic attacks and feel so lonely without my mum she was my best friend.. when will it start to get better I wonder.?.
I do not think there is a definite length ot time for the grieving process as it depends on so many different aspects of our lives. I was lucky to have family support and a very concerned GP who has kept an eye on me and I know my husband tried to prepare me in the time he had the cancer so perhaps this has helped a little. I am comforted by the knowledge that I had many happy years of being with him and draw on the memories in my heart when I have a ;down' day. Some people find counselling a real help and it may be worth considering as it could help you cope a little better with your loss and begin the tiny steps of moving forward. I am not sure how old you may be but it would be good to chat to your GP and explain your anxieties as they may be able to offer help in the short term. We never forget those we have lost as we carry them in our hearts. Sending a virtual hug at this sad time for you.Jules
