Hi there Amy, welcome to the forum, but really sorry to hear about your Dad. I think by your letter that you are probably the youngest in your family. If that is the case, then its' likely that you and your Dad have always been really close and that often happens with the youngest child in a family. I don't think you are being selfish; I just think you are having a really hard time of it, thinking about losing your Dad. Your need to have him close to yourself sounds like holding on to him will cause  him to stay with you longer. All of us who have lost loved ones know what that is like. Perhaps other members of your family would like to have some alone time with your Dad too, so perhaps a "family meeting" to talk about how something could be put in place to allow for some of that for each of you. Why not disuss this with a family member that you trust, perhaps your 21 year old sister. Sometimes when facing something like this, we tend to feel we're all alone in our feelings, but often others share those same concerns.

I don't know if anything I've said helps but I hope it gives you some ideas on how to cope with it. Come on here anytime to write your feelings down. That can help to sort things out in your own mind and perhaps get some ideas on how best to deal with them. I'm sure you will hear from some other people on the forum with some suggestions as well. In the meantime, take care of yourself and treasure any of your memories about your Dad because they will help you get through this.

Sending you hugs

Lorraine  

Hi there Amy, welcome to the forum, but really sorry to hear about your Dad. I think by your letter that you are probably the youngest in your family. If that is the case, then its' likely that you and your Dad have always been really close and that often happens with the youngest child in a family. I don't think you are being selfish; I just think you are having a really hard time of it, thinking about losing your Dad. Your need to have him close to yourself sounds like holding on to him will cause  him to stay with you longer. All of us who have lost loved ones know what that is like. Perhaps other members of your family would like to have some alone time with your Dad too, so perhaps a "family meeting" to talk about how something could be put in place to allow for some of that for each of you. Why not disuss this with a family member that you trust, perhaps your 21 year old sister. Sometimes when facing something like this, we tend to feel we're all alone in our feelings, but often others share those same concerns.

I don't know if anything I've said helps but I hope it gives you some ideas on how to cope with it. Come on here anytime to write your feelings down. That can help to sort things out in your own mind and perhaps get some ideas on how best to deal with them. I'm sure you will hear from some other people on the forum with some suggestions as well. In the meantime, take care of yourself and treasure any of your memories about your Dad because they will help you get through this.

Sending you hugs

Lorraine