Hi Sara,

I'm Nat, I can understand what you are feeling and experiencing. I have unfortunelty lost my mum 6 years ago, she was 57. I find it increadibly tough to talk to my fiancé about what happened and how I feel because he hasn't lost anyone close to him. You said that no one understands, there are people who do, you are not alone, on a planet filled with billions of people there are those who can relate. I was scared of losing my mum too, I thought of everything she would miss out on but you know what she hasn't and she won't, she'll just see it differently. 

She won't forget who you are, even though she is making no sense when she speaks I don't think she will forget you. It is an extremely scarry thought of her not bein around but it hasn't happened yet, cherrish every moment with her. 

You're freightened about how you're going to cope when the time comes, trust me you are strong. You may think you're not but you are. There are many ways in which people cope, there's no right or wrong way because everyone is different. One thing I can promise you is that you have family and a boyfriend who will support you the best they can and no doubt you will do the same for them. 

Take each day as it comes, You made the first steps by writing on here. I hope this has helped.

Take Care Sara x

Hi Nat

Sorry its taken a while to repond and thanks so much for your email.

Im sorry to hear about the loss of your mum and thank you for sharing your story with me. Did your partner know your mum? i like the way that you say your mum will see it differently that is true i guess but i would rather my mum would see them down here with us if you know what i mean?

i dont know if she will forget me at some point as the cancer is in the brain and it is starting to affect her a little like she is forgetting things and saying the wrong things even though i know what she is trying to say.  I dont feel strong at all, even though people keep saying i am! i feel very weak and vunerable right now.

Hope to hear from you soon xx

Thats totally fine you have a great deal on your plate to deal with.

He never got the chance to meet her as I had met him 10 months after my mum past away.

I totally understand what you mean, we all what our loved ones to be arounf for the biggest days of our lives and even for the little things.

My mum was very forgetful, I went on a trip to New York with my college for a week and she went into hospital after I got back. I went to visit her and she said to be 'Are you excited for New York then?' I replied 'Mum I've been' then she realised and was apologetic but it became the norm really.

You are bound to feel weak and vunerable but from an outsiders perspective we can see the strength you do have. A lot of people use to ask us 'How do you cope?' and we would give the same answer 'We just do' There is no correct answer when it comes to coping, no right way to do it.

Take Care lovely xx

Thats totally fine you have a great deal on your plate to deal with.

He never got the chance to meet her as I had met him 10 months after my mum past away.

I totally understand what you mean, we all what our loved ones to be arounf for the biggest days of our lives and even for the little things.

My mum was very forgetful, I went on a trip to New York with my college for a week and she went into hospital after I got back. I went to visit her and she said to be 'Are you excited for New York then?' I replied 'Mum I've been' then she realised and was apologetic but it became the norm really.

You are bound to feel weak and vunerable but from an outsiders perspective we can see the strength you do have. A lot of people use to ask us 'How do you cope?' and we would give the same answer 'We just do' There is no correct answer when it comes to coping, no right way to do it.

Take Care lovely xx