Dear Tony and wife, My husband was diagnosed with lung cancer at the end of the summer. It had already spread to other parts and today he was told it has reached the brain. We are still going to fight and gain as much time as possible. When we first got the news there was a lot of crying and asking why us. We are at a time of our lives when we have got through all the usual marital obstacles and considered ourselves as one of the few who has managed...just to find out that we won't be growing old together anyway. Once having "accepted",we started living each day as it comes. I have given up full time work to spend time with him. We have walks and time out. When my husband has less pain he goes out on his motorbike. I give him all the space to choose as he wants. He has just been to a Bob Dylan concert with our daughter. How he manages I'm not sure but he feels a need to live now. I know exactly what you are feeling now and only who has been there can understand. What I can say in this painful moment is cry as much as you want now, hug and spend this time together BUT then start doing everything you wanted to do as a couple, from having breakfast in bed to flying to Rome for the weekend. Stop asking why and start cherishing every moment together. Be selfish and spend time only with who you really have at heart whether friends or family. There will be good days and bad days and on the bad days your positivity will mean everything to your wife. But what's important is to make every day one together. A warm hug to you both.

Dear Tony and wife, My husband was diagnosed with lung cancer at the end of the summer. It had already spread to other parts and today he was told it has reached the brain. We are still going to fight and gain as much time as possible. When we first got the news there was a lot of crying and asking why us. We are at a time of our lives when we have got through all the usual marital obstacles and considered ourselves as one of the few who has managed...just to find out that we won't be growing old together anyway. Once having "accepted",we started living each day as it comes. I have given up full time work to spend time with him. We have walks and time out. When my husband has less pain he goes out on his motorbike. I give him all the space to choose as he wants. He has just been to a Bob Dylan concert with our daughter. How he manages I'm not sure but he feels a need to live now. I know exactly what you are feeling now and only who has been there can understand. What I can say in this painful moment is cry as much as you want now, hug and spend this time together BUT then start doing everything you wanted to do as a couple, from having breakfast in bed to flying to Rome for the weekend. Stop asking why and start cherishing every moment together. Be selfish and spend time only with who you really have at heart whether friends or family. There will be good days and bad days and on the bad days your positivity will mean everything to your wife. But what's important is to make every day one together. A warm hug to you both.