the future looks bleak

I am new to this forum.  My husband, aged 76, has been diagnosed with cancer of the stomach and oesophagus.  Thus far he has had CT scan Endoscopy, gastroscopy, and PET scan.  A lesion on the liver was probably not malignant, but further tests (MRI and laparoscopy) will be carried out.  In addition, heart and lung resilience has been found to be OK, but overall fitness has yet to be assessed.


I am supporting him every step of the way, but we live in mid Devon, and some of the tests and the operation if it is deemed to be ok in the light of all the test results, will be in Plymouth - many miles away.  To support him, I would have to stay at a hotel, since travelling back and forth each day is not viable.

I am finding it all overwhelming.  In many ways (and I feel so guilty expressing this) I almost have come to wish that the operation (brutal, life-changing and long recovery) is found to be impossible.  Which then gives a 1 year, at best, life expectancy.

I'm finding it hard to be positive, but the strain between us (irritability etc) is becoming unbearable.

Just putting this on screen is hard, and I hope that someone, somewhere has a few words of comfort and advice. 

 

 

 

 

 

Parents
  • Hi, so sorry to hear about your husband. But do take time out and look after yourself too. Its so good to hear that you are supporting him. And yes, Macmillan nurses are wonderful, please speak to them. Also you can register for hospital transport, its free. I used to take Cancer patients to hospital for 2 years before I myself got Cancer. NHS provides this service. Speak to your hospital reception, they will register you. Good luck and stay positive. God bless you both xx

Reply
  • Hi, so sorry to hear about your husband. But do take time out and look after yourself too. Its so good to hear that you are supporting him. And yes, Macmillan nurses are wonderful, please speak to them. Also you can register for hospital transport, its free. I used to take Cancer patients to hospital for 2 years before I myself got Cancer. NHS provides this service. Speak to your hospital reception, they will register you. Good luck and stay positive. God bless you both xx

Children