Hi Primr0se,

I just wanted to say I read your post and completely understand how you feel. This diagnosis is a massive upheaval to both of your lives, you're human and must be dreading the months to come. Do you have any family who can help share the burden or maybe Macmillan could help. Make sure you take some time out for yourself and keep yourself well as you matter too in all this. I wish you and your husband well.

Jane xx

Thank you Jane.  I suppose I just needed to get it off my chest to a bunch of people who would understand, and yes, your suggestion of Macmillan is a good one that I had thought of but not taken any action.  Apart from anything else - how do you have a heartfelt conversation on the phone when the patient, my husband, is always in earshot?

Family is small and spread far and wide in the UK and abroad, and although I have friends who will support me it is far from practical - again through distance etc.  So I am very much on my own.

Sorry to sound so self-pitying, but when I had breast cancer 20 years ago, it wasn't anything like as emotional as this.

pr1mr0se

Hi it must be so difficult for you both it does make you wonder sometimes what you've done to deserve this especially later in life its so cruel ,but its good to hear you are supporting him every step of the way what would he do without you ,a lady on here stayed in a flat near the hospital whilst her her husband was being treated as it was a long trip for her and very costly in a taxi ,fortunately they are both back at home now but it does look like you might have to do something similar whilst your husband has his treatment whatever it may be ,it can be done they are an elderly couple as well ,as someone has suggested it might be good to contact Mcmillans they are apparently very helpful ,whatever happens I wish you both well there's always someone freindly on here to give advice every day so I would just take each day as it comes and ask Macmillans for some help and advice as you need it Best Wishes Jenny .

Thank you Jenny for your reply.  I take on board the fact the I am not alone, and my problems in part or in full have been experienced by so many others.

Having made contact on this forum I feel less alone, and am grateful for the responses.  

Next week will be busy again - consultation on Wednesday (but on-line rather than a trip to Plymouth, thank goodness) and MRI scan next Friday.

Your advice is sound:  I shall try to take it all a day at a time, and not look too far ahead if I can.

x

pr1mr0se

Hi, so sorry to hear about your husband. But do take time out and look after yourself too. Its so good to hear that you are supporting him. And yes, Macmillan nurses are wonderful, please speak to them. Also you can register for hospital transport, its free. I used to take Cancer patients to hospital for 2 years before I myself got Cancer. NHS provides this service. Speak to your hospital reception, they will register you. Good luck and stay positive. God bless you both xx

Hi primrose,  I understand where you are with all this going on .I just wanted to say there might be a possibility of a red Cross hostel or a hospital hotel both of which are excellent in price minimal. We have this where I am in the North East.Generally used by folk from the Islands coming over for surgery.  I had thought Macmillan were only Scotland , & your equivalent were Marie Currie. Ask in the hospital reception or nurses may advise. Take care thinking of you both pip

I hadn't thought about patient transport, so that is a very good suggestion.  Thank you.
I'm trying to keep positive, and just sharing my worries on here show that "a problem shared is a problem halved" according to the proverb.

pr1mr0se

x

Thanks for the suggestion:  I have been told that there is a hostel close to the hospital, so I shall follow it up.  I can't do anything definite until I get some firm dates to work with, but if I have the information in principle, that will be a weight off my mind.

pr1mr0se

x

Hi  sorry to hear that your husband is having trouble, hospital transport is through your GP surgery. They take you to clinics ect. I would have a word with the Macmillan nurses to give you a idea of the help available in your area. There's probably more than you realise, the surgery is a good place to start there's lots of leaflets ect. 
Staying near the hospital for your husband's treatment is a good idea, the cost can be not much more than travelling around. My sister in law takes her caravan with her when she goes for eye treatment in the next county.  They park on a local site so they don't have to go home between her next day appointments. 
Its well worth being well informed before you need it, we all feel better feeling we are prepared. 
Do keep talking to us as it helps to share your worries. 
take care of yourself. 
susie
 

I'm sorry not to have replied to your kind post sooner.  I ought to have bookmarked the site of this forum, and forgot.

Lots of tests etc still in the pipeline, and I am in the process of checking out the suggestions re hospital transport etc.  

Things will sort themselves out no doubt.  I try to keep as cheerful as possible - and at least at this time of year there is much to enjoy, with all the spring flowers, the lanes full of primroses, the hedgerows getting greener by the day.  Small incremental changes that raise my spirits.

Pr1mr0se

x