Dear SJP,

We all are just learners in this school of life, so I'm not speaking as someone who knows but as a fellow seeker of wisdom. 

If I was to answer your question, I would say: take it moment by moment. Don't think too much, thinking isn't very helpful in what you and your loved ones are going through. Those feelings, they are a part of our human experience, and when our turn comes to experience them, it's better to take them through the heart, because the mind is not up to the task.

I know this because earlier this year I lost my dad after a long illness, and on the way to his funeral, my niece and her fiance had a car accident, and they both died. It hit my family like a bomb and I could not even be there because of the pandemic (I live abroad). In the deepest sadness and shock I still had to find courage to call my brother and my sister in law and say something. I couldn't even give them a hug, I had to find words to say over the phone. What do you say to a man who lost his father, his daughter and his friend in one week? I didn't have the words, and I felt very scared and helpless. But I called. 

I've learnt the only thing that can possibly help in this kind of sadness is love and I wish you a lot of love - for your dad, your family and yourself. 

Dear SJP,

We all are just learners in this school of life, so I'm not speaking as someone who knows but as a fellow seeker of wisdom. 

If I was to answer your question, I would say: take it moment by moment. Don't think too much, thinking isn't very helpful in what you and your loved ones are going through. Those feelings, they are a part of our human experience, and when our turn comes to experience them, it's better to take them through the heart, because the mind is not up to the task.

I know this because earlier this year I lost my dad after a long illness, and on the way to his funeral, my niece and her fiance had a car accident, and they both died. It hit my family like a bomb and I could not even be there because of the pandemic (I live abroad). In the deepest sadness and shock I still had to find courage to call my brother and my sister in law and say something. I couldn't even give them a hug, I had to find words to say over the phone. What do you say to a man who lost his father, his daughter and his friend in one week? I didn't have the words, and I felt very scared and helpless. But I called. 

I've learnt the only thing that can possibly help in this kind of sadness is love and I wish you a lot of love - for your dad, your family and yourself.