I am so very sorry for your loss. I lost my dad five months and it gets harder. I cannot believe he is gone. Sending hugs and love to you xxx

I'm sorry to hear all your sad messages

It helps me a little reading them I lost my mum on 16th July this year she had lung and liver cancer and 2 tumors on her brain I am very close to my mum as my brothers too I scattered her ashes on Sunday it was very difficult and still is,everyday I want to call n text mum or visit and then reality kicks in straight away I feel a lost soul right now I try keep busy bt always mum pops into my head everyday I will never forget 2018 worst year of my life I can't seem to carry on normal and feel part of me has gone forever I'm so broken hurt and sad lonely yearning for mum to be here,I have vivid dreams everynight 

i lost my mum a week today and feel exactly how u have descrbed i see ya post was nearly 2 years ago an dont even no iff u will get this message but plz iff u do let me no iff u feel any better as right now im seriously suicidal i cant live without my mum sorry ..just need help

I'm so sorry to read about your mum Dave and I would like to offer you my sincerest and heartfelt condolences on her passing.

Coping with grief is very tough, in fact I'd go as far as saying it's probably one of the hardest things anyone will face during their lifetime, but I really want you to know you are not alone. We have other members on the forum who are also grieving for the loss of their mothers so will know exactly how you are feeling at the moment. I'm going to include a link to their discussions here and here as I think chatting to them will really help.

As you've mentioned you're feeling suicidal I would strongly suggest getting in touch with your GP as soon as you can to let them know how you are feeling as they will do all they can to help you through this very difficult time. Many who are grieving have found night times to be the hardest part of the day so if you find yourself struggling or just needing someone to talk to then do give Samaritans a call. Their lines are open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week on 116 123. They are there to listen and provide a safe place to discuss what you're going through.

Many members such as [@Paulus]‍ have found bereavement councilling a great souce of comfort and support so that may be an area worth looking in to as well.

I can't begin to imagine how tough this must be for you Dave but the Cancer Chat community are here for you and can assure you that it will get better with time.

Kind regards, 

Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

Hi Dave, iv just lost my mum 3 week back, i almost feel like im im limbo and the world is carring on without me, its such a surreal feeling, times i would chat with her and go to ring her and i can't, yet no one seems to want to remember her but me,  here to chat, JJ 

hi,

my mumpassed away a year ago this tuesday and i find every dayas difficult as the last. i miss her so much , she was not just my mum but my best friend and i find carrying on so difficult. i have been to bereavment counsiling and i guess it helped a little but there is nothing that can fill that hole that is left. i wish you well and can only say that time is the only healer , not much help i know but it is all i have left to hold on to, my sincere wishes to you

pete

hi , i know exactly how you feel , i feel im the one the one who is pushed out of the family because of the the great loss i feel , i live on my own so i don;t feel like i have anyone to lean on on in these times of stress and loss. i miss my mum so much it's indescriblel as im sure you well know. there is no easy answer , oh how i wish there were it's a case of day by day, i feel for you ,little comfort i know , but there are plenty of us all in the same boat , please take care

pete

Losing My Manoula (mum) has been the hardest thing in my life to cope with.  She was released to the Gods 7 months ago and every day is an almighty, and mean an almighty climb and loss within me.  We are Greek Orthodox and not allowing to cremate in Greece, I had her cremated here, then I took her back home to where she belongs, amongst the stars and warmth she can feel.  I see her many times whilst I am sleeping and being the only daughter it has turned my inner world into emptyness.  She used to live opposite me where I could care for her every needs every day. Then one day I look out of my window and see just a closed door :-( - You never ever get over something so close to you all your life and even though every day is a healer, it makes the hurt stronger to remember everything of her. I look in the mirror and I see her reflection in mine we are that so alike.  All I can say to all you lovely and caring people, it eases and how we cope with our grief is the hardest thing to do, but I am a good listener and know and feel every bit of pain when it comes to speaking about your one and only mum, that I sure do know.  Try and keep smiling she wouldn't want you to be without a smile xx

My mum died just under 2 weeks ago and I'm struggling so much to carry on. I work full time, 40 hours a week but it's so diffucult cos all I can think about is my beautiful amazing mum

She was diagnosed 2.5 years ago with multiple myeloma (although she managed to keep it from me for 2 years) I knew there was something wrong with her as she told me the hospital informed her she had sonething wrong but she assured me she would get better

She was a naturopath and very against medical help

However this year her illness took a turn for the worst and she ended up in hospital. So she had no choice but to tell me how I'll she was

After this she never made it back home. Sadly her cancer had spread to her lungs and breast

Having to see my mum in the final days was by far the worst thing I've ever had to see. Her whole body decayed with cancer. 

She had a very peaceful death, she was on constant morphine. I should be happy she's out of pain. But she was my beautiful mum and I'm completely lost without her. She'd faithfully text me good morning and goodnight

I have lost all my appetite and have no enthusiasm for anything. I feel so angry that I've been left alone in the world (my dad died of liver disease) and so angry with everyone and everything, even though no ones done anything wrong

Ive never felt so alone, I have very few people I can or would want to talk to. I'm not the most outgoing person and feel as though I have to put up a barrier and pretend I'm ok when I'm really not especially in work and around my mum's friends etc

My whole world feels ripped apart :( 

I just want my mum back so so much it's like a truly horrible dream.....

I'm so sorry to hear you've recently lost your mum and dad and to everyone else here who has. I lost my mum a year and a half ago and I totally resonate with those who feel like they've lost part of themselves not just a parent. The world can feel lonely and well, pretty frightening.

I don't know you or your work situation, but could you possibly take some time off? It sounds like you've been through a lot and are right in the middle of grieving whilst trying to outwardly carry on like normal, which sounds incredibly hard. You need to be kind to yourself and give yourself time to feel however you want to feel. I know it sounds cliche, but maybe bereavement counselling would be a good idea too if you felt like it was something you could do.

Please remember as well that it's early days. I'm not saying the pain gets less, because it doesn't, but it does get interspersed with good things. Take care x