I feel totally the same Jess. My precious mum died last June from stage 4 brain & lung cancer which had metastasized from her breast cancer which she had had in 2018. She was diagnosed in November & 7 months later she was gone. I live in NY but flew back to Scotland immediately when she found out & stayed by her side for every step of those 7 months. We also lost my dad in a freak fall 10 weeks before my mum died which was so unexpected & was such a heartbreaking ordeal to go through while also caring for mum 24/7. Here I am now 7 months since she passed & 9 for dad & I am still absolutely devastated on a daily basis. I've been talking to a grief counselor from the hospice since last February which I highly recommend. I find that it helps to just to be able to talk freely about mum as I try not to always be a Debbie downer when friends ask how I am even though i'm desperate to talk about her a lot. Sometimes it's so hard to see everyone else just going on with their normal lives again but im still stuck in this dark, sad, exhausting mindset all the time. Right now im finding it very hard to function, im barely sleeping, my mind NEVER stops thinking about mum & I'm having a really hard time dealing with this awful debilitating depression. I used to read this forum when I was looking after mum but have never written on here till tonight. I'm sad to read your story & the others who have responded to you but am glad that I have found people who understand what im going through & who can relate. This is a horrendous journey to be on & one which can feel incredibly lonely at times so I'm relieved to know that im really not alone in this nightmare. Sending all who have lost someone they truly love the biggest hug. I know I could really use one too. 

I feel totally the same Jess. My precious mum died last June from stage 4 brain & lung cancer which had metastasized from her breast cancer which she had had in 2018. She was diagnosed in November & 7 months later she was gone. I live in NY but flew back to Scotland immediately when she found out & stayed by her side for every step of those 7 months. We also lost my dad in a freak fall 10 weeks before my mum died which was so unexpected & was such a heartbreaking ordeal to go through while also caring for mum 24/7. Here I am now 7 months since she passed & 9 for dad & I am still absolutely devastated on a daily basis. I've been talking to a grief counselor from the hospice since last February which I highly recommend. I find that it helps to just to be able to talk freely about mum as I try not to always be a Debbie downer when friends ask how I am even though i'm desperate to talk about her a lot. Sometimes it's so hard to see everyone else just going on with their normal lives again but im still stuck in this dark, sad, exhausting mindset all the time. Right now im finding it very hard to function, im barely sleeping, my mind NEVER stops thinking about mum & I'm having a really hard time dealing with this awful debilitating depression. I used to read this forum when I was looking after mum but have never written on here till tonight. I'm sad to read your story & the others who have responded to you but am glad that I have found people who understand what im going through & who can relate. This is a horrendous journey to be on & one which can feel incredibly lonely at times so I'm relieved to know that im really not alone in this nightmare. Sending all who have lost someone they truly love the biggest hug. I know I could really use one too. 

Hey lovely girl , sorry for the late reply I was in a right state when I wrote for the first time and was surprised with the replies feel like it really helped ️ I've had my little boys 6th birthday and been working loads so havnt had a chance to come on here . 
 

Absolutely heartbroken for you , I bet you just think why me , when's the luck going to change for you to have no mum and dad . I don't actually know how you're coping but I think you're right being on here and reading other peoples stories makes you realise it actually is common but it's hard when you look around social media and the majority of people you know have they're parents and nans still etc and you just feel like you have all the bad luck , losing my mum isn't the only thing that's happened to us either and I just can't even imagine anything else happening . 
 

how are you this week ??.. I don't know how to do it but I've seen you can actually message people on here so message me anytime!! I'm feeling ok this week I booked my first counselling session which is on the 09th feb so I can't wait for that feel like I have a lot to get off my chest ️ 
 

sending you lots of hugs because I know how you feel when people are constantly asking how you are and you can't just keep saying no actually I'm not ok because people don't understand ‍♀️‍♀️