looking after mum is breaking me

Hi,

I've joined this group to try and express how I feel and talk to people who are going through the same. It's comforting knowing people are having the same emotions as generally I find that people don't know what to say to me. So here goes.....

My mum is 53. She caught a cold at the beginning of the summer holidays and was told she had a chest infection, then plurecy...chest X-ray.ct and biopsy. Long story short she didn't get better and my sister took her to a and e before we had the results as mum really wasn't looking well.  On 14th November 2014 they told my mum she had stage 4 lung cancer. Already had spotting on the bones in various places. Her hip broke while she was in hospital due to cancer in the hip. They let her out on 28th November and she came to stay with me. They gave her some chemo in the hope it would slow things down but over Xmas she became unwell and a CT revealed that the primary tumour in her lung had continued to grow even with the chemo so they stopped. She has had some radiotherapy to help with pain. It's difficult looking after her. I feel so helpless. She is so young to have this. I know it can happen to anyone but seems so unfair. So now it's a waiting game.mtaking each day as it comes.ma she won't ask how long she has and I know they can't tell you anyways. Anyone else dealing with stage 4 lung? Feel so many emotions at the moment. It's tearing me apart,m 

Parents
  • Hello Ilovemarsbars,

    Welcome to the forum. Great username by the way. Do you really love Mars Bars? They are nice, aren't they?

    What you are going through is very difficult but you have come to the right place to reach out to others who can only understand too well what it must be like to look after a loved one who has cancer. Someone posted only just yesterday who is also looking after her dad who has cancer (he is also 53 like your mum)  and sadly lost a mum to lung cancer and I think you two could find a lot of comfort from talking to each other. It helps to talk to someone who is going through a similar experience and emotions.

    I am not sure how old you are and I mentioned it to kjg1999 who is 15 but this organization provides support to young people who have a parent with cancer:

    Riprap
    Website: www.riprap.org.uk
    This site offers support to children between 12 and 16 who have a parent with cancer. There is information about cancer and a forum to share experiences.

    I hope this helps a little and that this forum will be a safe place for you to come to whenever you want to reach out to someone.

    Best wishes,

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

Reply
  • Hello Ilovemarsbars,

    Welcome to the forum. Great username by the way. Do you really love Mars Bars? They are nice, aren't they?

    What you are going through is very difficult but you have come to the right place to reach out to others who can only understand too well what it must be like to look after a loved one who has cancer. Someone posted only just yesterday who is also looking after her dad who has cancer (he is also 53 like your mum)  and sadly lost a mum to lung cancer and I think you two could find a lot of comfort from talking to each other. It helps to talk to someone who is going through a similar experience and emotions.

    I am not sure how old you are and I mentioned it to kjg1999 who is 15 but this organization provides support to young people who have a parent with cancer:

    Riprap
    Website: www.riprap.org.uk
    This site offers support to children between 12 and 16 who have a parent with cancer. There is information about cancer and a forum to share experiences.

    I hope this helps a little and that this forum will be a safe place for you to come to whenever you want to reach out to someone.

    Best wishes,

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

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