Hi

I am so sorry that you are so anxious for your mum. I am being treated for breast cancer and I can't imagine how I would cope without my daughter's love and positive support. Your mum needs you right now and it will help you too if you can  direct your anxiety into being proactive in supporting her. Attend the appointment with her, ask questions, provide meals, do the shopping, anything will be gratefully received - trust me. Also don't google too much! 

Take care.

C x

Hi there,

Sorry you're having this anxiety over your mum's health.  It's hard not to worry but please try as there are so many things it could be. It could still be an infection, the fact that antibiotics haven't worked doesn't change that, some types of infection require different antibiotics.

Maybe focussing hard on the practical help that your mum needs just now would help distract you from your worry?  Pushing her away certainly isn't going to help either of you.

Using Dr. Google definitely isn't a good idea because you will find articles on all sorts of weird and wonderful conditions.  The more boring and common reasons (infections) are less likely to come up in your searches.  So Dr. Google will just add to your worry.

Please don't be mad at the nurses, they will simply be following the usual NHS guidelines.  You don't automatically get sent to the breast clinic just because of a rash on your breast.

If you use the links at the top of this page you will find something on inflammatory breast cancer, but I can't see how that will help you to be honest.  You won't know what your mum has until she gets seen by the breast clinic and has various tests done, there is little point knowing about IBC unless it is confirmed that this is what your mum has.

So, as Harvell says, I would also suggest getting away from Dr. Google and focussing on helping your mum.  If she is in pain maybe you can help her find positions that are less painful?  Maybe she needs help finding a position in which she can sleep and some pillows or cushions to help keep her in this position?  Maybe certain motions make it more painful and she could do with help rearranging cupboards to make it easier to reach things etc.?  Try and find practical things you can do to keep yourself distracted and to help your mum.

Most of all try not to let the worry win.  It's hard I know, but it just robs us of good times and that is sad if it turns out your mum has something that can be treated easily.

If in doubt ask your mum what help she needs.

Let us know how she gets on at her appointment, and we're here if your mum wants to talk at all too.

LJx

**update**

mum is now in a + e as the redness and pain have got far worse over the last 48 hours. Docs think she may have an abcess but cant feel one..... they have admitted her to put antibiotics streight into her blood.... if no betta in the morning gunna scan her breast what the hell i cant believe this is happening it quite clearly is not anninfection i frel sick to my stomach but at least she is getting seen to now

Hi Ellaloz,

I am so sorry to hear that your mum's breast problems have escalated. I hope that now she has been admitted to hospital, that they will find out exactly what is wrong.

Thinking of you both and, please let us know how she gets on. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

The fact it went away with antibiotics at one stage leads me to think it's an absess or some infection like cellulitis.

I hope she recovers fast 

Hi and thanks for your message..

i really hope you are  right. No news as yet as she was transferred to a different hospital they dont have the right fascilities at our hospital. And thats wasnt until after 1am so a long day ahead x

So sorry you have all this stress, hope it's a simple infection that antibiotics can take care of....what a start to 2019! 

Keep us posted xxxx

So today......

mum is on 2 different types of antibiotics now havnt touched it to be honest redness gone down ever so slightly but thats all,  she was supposed to have a scan today but they really want this swelling to go down so planning to go ahead with that tmoz wether they will or not i dnt no she cant have a mammogram as too painful

i keep having momens of feeling really positive then feel real fear and dread AWFUL!   

And on top of all that you have to be strong for your mum, well, it sounds like they have a plan in place, it will take time to kick in, you have no choice but to be patient....I hope you manage to sleep ok during this stressful time as the last thing you need is to be under the weather....keep us posted.....and take care xxxx

It does sound more like an infection. Cancer doesn’t usually come and go.