Incurable prostate cancer

Hello All

My dear husband has just been told he has incurable prostate cancer.

Background. Aged 61 - healthy on no meds but a little overweight. Father died of prostate cancer 35 years ago.

Becasue of family history had a PSA every year. The last one in March this year  came back 5.6 went back a few weeks later for another at 5.9 so GP thought all ok but sent him for an MRI scan to be sure (thank you GP) . Scan then went to biopsy and told cancer with  a gleeson score 9  of 4+5 and very aggressive.

Then had PET scan which shows spread to lymph and small area of bone in pelvis. What we had hoped was curable is not. We are devastated and terrified as we thought having a test every year woud mean if it did start to develop it would be early days and easily curable. .

Husband already started hormone tablets and then will have  hormone injections (for rest of life) and chemo. They have called it triple therapy and said they will hit it hard.

We have not dared ask for a prognosis. They looked so grave when they told us and did not say anything positive except they would hit it hard.  I did google  ( i know I shouldnt) and some articles say 3 years...

The articles talk about dealing with bone pain etc - my husband has no symptoms and it is hard to understand how it is so advanced. 

I have seen some stories of people living much longer even when deemed incurable. . Can anyone give us any hope/advice please.

Thank you

Parents
  • Hi VWW I am sorry to hear about your husband.  I have incurable breast cancer with mets in pelvis, sacrum, whole of spine, ribs and skull.  I was diagnosed in September 2024.  It is very scary when you first hear that you have incurable cancer, but one thing, it is treatable.  I do have a lot of bone pain but this is manageable with pain killers.  Please do not google as most of the information is out of date, these forums and Macmillan are much more reliable and helpful.  In time it does get easier and life carries on, a new kind of life (mine is just a bit slower).  I have a good life and have been on holiday to Portugal and Iceland and plan a trip to Portugal in September.  I decided I am going to live with cancer and live my best life.  People are living for a very long time with this and there are new treatments, trials and drugs coming out all the time.  The Macmillan site has a specific forum for prostrate cancer and lots of positive stories and supportive people.  If you both would like to the Maggie centers offer a lot of support.  I also use Penny Brohn and they do lots of zoom meetings for nutrition, exercise and all kinds of different things.  You did the right thing by posting of here I always feel better when I write things down and know that I am not alone.

    Lee x  (Lisa)

Reply
  • Hi VWW I am sorry to hear about your husband.  I have incurable breast cancer with mets in pelvis, sacrum, whole of spine, ribs and skull.  I was diagnosed in September 2024.  It is very scary when you first hear that you have incurable cancer, but one thing, it is treatable.  I do have a lot of bone pain but this is manageable with pain killers.  Please do not google as most of the information is out of date, these forums and Macmillan are much more reliable and helpful.  In time it does get easier and life carries on, a new kind of life (mine is just a bit slower).  I have a good life and have been on holiday to Portugal and Iceland and plan a trip to Portugal in September.  I decided I am going to live with cancer and live my best life.  People are living for a very long time with this and there are new treatments, trials and drugs coming out all the time.  The Macmillan site has a specific forum for prostrate cancer and lots of positive stories and supportive people.  If you both would like to the Maggie centers offer a lot of support.  I also use Penny Brohn and they do lots of zoom meetings for nutrition, exercise and all kinds of different things.  You did the right thing by posting of here I always feel better when I write things down and know that I am not alone.

    Lee x  (Lisa)

Children
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