Oh Jules forgive my post on my site to you .....I am so sorry not to have known of your hubbies departure.  You know from the support you have given me how well I understand your current situation and my heart goes out to you.  My site tells of my joirney through this uncharted place you find yourself in.  It is difficult but you will come through.

All my thoughts and a big virtual hug

Ian x

Hi Ian

Just lovely to see your name appear on my thread and suspect its just as hard for you to post but I really appreciate the message.  It was a long three years for hubby and I take much comfort in the fact that he is now free from the clutches of his disease which took his happiness away.  I am surrounded by the love of my family and friends (and the ongoing support of virtuality buddies) and now, like you, my life must be lived to the best of my ability. Early days still but so many memories to cherish and share with others - a few late nights of 'story-telling' along the way.

Sending hugs and best wishes and hope all is well with you and Julie in your new life.  Jules x

Hello Jules Ive just got back from Asda and packed shopping away I bought my son a cake its his birthday so I think we will have a piece at lunchtime  .He hinted at needing a mirror for his lounge so homebase closed down a few weeks ago ,and I was lucky enough to get a nice one reduced from £75 down to £15 so was lucky ..Hope he approves .Oh Jules it must have been so hard watching hubbies car being taken ,and how much more bad luck can you have its sods law isnt it like your daughter said things can only get better ,its so rotten you just have to laugh Jules ,and  have a good SCREAM let it all out  .Realy Jules I think you are doing so well ,and hope keeping in touch with your forum friends ,helps you through this difficult time ...I send big hugs ...SueanneXx

Coo = you have a good eye for a bargain Sueanne = well done with your mirror!! Yea Jules - it must feel wierd seeing the old car go = like a new chapter opening: still you won't miss the bills - I have my MOT tomorrow - I wonder how much that will cost? It will be good when you get back to work and you will be busy and time will go quickly. I find this at work. Thank goodness I have my job = I would go nuts stuck at home. Mum is stable and I will see her tomorrow - a lady at work told me her dad was the same and lasted three weeks. Perhaps we will be lucky - she is very frail but the staff have got some fluids down her. 

Anne threw the wooly jumper out today - she said it was a mothy old thing. I loved it - but she was right = so my investment in knicker elastic was too little too late !! ( I put it round the waist as the jumper had stretched so much it was like a mini skirt!!) 

Take care brave lady and here is a hug for you xxx

Steven

Good morning Sueanne

What a great bargain the mirror was and I do hope your son was pleased with his gift and his birthday cake. It will be my daughter's birthday on Valentines Day and my son's 30th a week later, their first without Dad and another hurdle to jump. Coping together is the only way at the moment and,yes, having my forum buddies to chat with has always been a great support personally. Had a chat with the solicitors re probate yesterday and will make a decision by the weekend as to who to 'appoint' on the family's behalf.  This will at least relieve me of much of the officialdom! 

I popped in to see my Manager at work yesterday to confirm I will return to work on Monday.  Think it will do me good to get back into some sort of normal routine. Having said that because I was 'holding' holiday for the 'just in case' scenario, I now have another 7 days off to fit in before end of March . Because I only work a 3 day week, this will give me a full two weeks break so have booked half term week which will mean I can treat the grandchildren to a day out (or two) and probably have the eldest for a sleepover, thus giving my daughter a bit of a break too and then have the next week (to relax and hopefully do some 'Spring gardening'.

Lovely here in Middlesex at present and will be seeing Mum (with new social worker) this afternoon for her  re-assessment to begin. Should also get a call from the Coroner's Office so plenty to keep the brain ticking!!

Have a peaceful day.  Hugs  Jules x

Hi Steven,

A shame you have lost your comfy jumper but perhaps the elastic can be put to another use. Hope your find your Mum comfortable when you visit and it is reassuring to know she is well looked after.  I will also see my Mum this afternoon and as mentioned to Sueanne, we have a meeting with her new social worker as the re-assessment of her care needs begins (this is because she can no longer afford to self fund and a year ago they wanted her moved to 'care within the community').  I a not sure what will be the outcome but once again, its a step by step process.

Hope you and Anne are keeping well and send peaceful hugs your way. Jules x

Grrrrrrrrrrrrr, just wrote a reply to have the internet go down mid flow (been trying to get hold of customer services for my Broadband Service)  which is being a bit naughty at the moment.   Think I may need a new router as it constantly needs re-booting.  So frustrating.

Hope Hannah had the scan she needed and they can find out what is causing so much pain. Fingers crossed that the medication is keeping her comfortable in the meantime.

Hope the busman's holiday will leave you a bit of time for some relaxation  but at least you do not have the stress of travelling for a week!  Am thinking it will be a bit strange getting back to my work routine but do really need that structure back in my life.  That being said, I have apparently still 7 days leave (with my part time hours that equals two weeks off!!) which I need to take before end of March (new holiday year starts 1st April).  Will put dates forward on Monday (Manager says sooner the better for his planning) and a hoping for half ter week so I can spend time with grandchildren and also give my daughter a break. She has hospital appointment for the eldest at Great Ormond Street tomorrow so I am having fun time with 15mth old Zack (as well as taking delivery of new washer dryer) - not sure where I will find the time for working ha ha.

Enjoy the rest of your week.  Peaceful hugs send your way and hope your catch up with Claire brings a smile or two.  Jules x

Hello Jules ,how lovely that your daughters birthday is on Valentines Day ,and what a lovely Valentines gift that must have been for you both when she was born so romantic ..One of my friends ,when we went to school had her birthday on the same day too ..I know how hard it is writing out cards and just putting your name ,Its 2 years in Feb since I lost Tony and I still find it hard ,but it must get easier in time I hope ,its still very early days for you Jules and you must like Beryl has said take your time and take  baby steps.Jules hope getting back to work will help ,and you will have the support of your work mates too ,and with a holiday in a short while will be something to look forward to .And Jules I hope you have a good visit with the new social worker and things turn out in yours and Mums favour ..Rusty and I have been for our walk and we met his girlfriend in the park Jessie another greyhound she is black and Rusty is Fawn they love a romp together .The weather is dry and 8.6 degs at the moment but drizzle then rain is forcast for later ..Take care Jules Big Hugs ..Sueanne Xx

Hi Jules,

Just popped in to say I hope you're OK.  Trust you will get your internet problems sorted - very frustrating, the internet is something we have all come to rely on these days.  Best wishes for your return to work next week, sometimes it is good to get back to routine but remember to take time out for yourself whenever you need.  Take care.  Hope x

Thanks for your post Hope.  You know only too well that grieving plots it's own course and in some ways there is no 'controlling' it.  As yet we are still awaiting closure on the legalities surrounding registration of death (GP/Registrar having made errors in the paperwork!) so am a bit in limbo which really does  not help  me or the children just now. Everyday stuff has to carry on and life in general is pretty busy which everyone tells me is good (but I would enjoy some 'quiet time'in my head if that makes any sense.

Internet problems are intermittant but nonetheless frustrating as so much of the 'old paperwork' is now done online.  Engineer due out this morning so fingers crossed they find a problem they can fix (£65 fee if they dont!!!!!).  With washer/dryer due for delivery too plus the happy task of having Zack to stay I am in for one varied day ahead .

Hope all is well with you and the family. No doubt the boys keeping busy with their studies and you are adjusting still. Look after yourself. Sending kind thoughts and hugs. Jules x

Good morning Jules,

I can understand the frustrations your internet problems are giving you especially when now is the one time when you really don't need it.  Having said that the growl at the beginning of your post made me smile as someone I work with growls like that on a regular basis.

The work part of my busmans holiday is mostly done as the gutter and facia is now up on the back of the bungalow but I am now trying to find a good home for our lounge furniture, tv stand, cupboard unit etc. I am actually taking the large coffee table to my mother in law's a little later although it will completely fill what's left of her living room so I don't really know why she wants it.We have decided to splash out on some oak furniture which will arrive, hopefully on Friday.  It will be good to have some quality furniture for the first time but it does mean there is far less chance of a cruise this year.  Never mind, there is too much to do around the house anyway.

Good luck with your own delivery and I do hope that the engineer can sort out your internet.

Charge you £65 if they can't find a problem - how does that work? Once upon a time people only got paid if they fixed a problem, not if they couldn't find one.  There's that progress again! ;)

Love to you Jules.

Garf xx

Hi Kathy

Washer dryer in and ready to go (when I have read the blurb that goes with it!!).  Interenet has temporary repar until new router with different engineer comes out (the joys of switching from hubby's name has lead to password issues like you would not believe but at least I have access at present.).  Both appointments booked for am, both arrived after 2 pm but as I had Zack to keep me amused no real problem.

Hope to have appointed probate solicitors by end of week but still plenty of stuff to keep me amused (not sure where I will find the time to return to work but am going back on Monday anyhow).  Glad you are also beginning to get somewhere with the legal side of things too.  I am actually Executor for hubby but plan on passing the buck so to speak as really do not need the added stress of doing all the running around.  With hopefully all the necessary boxes ticked now, we are able to move forward a little more.

The little ones certainly never fail to bring smiles and Zack has been as good as gold today and is now tucked up in bed and I am planning my evening meal in peace (hope I have not spoken too soon ha ha).

Take care forum friend.Hugs across the miles  Jules