No, you should definitely not feel you have to pretend to feel something you don't. If you wanted to, that would be different; some people prefer to keep how they are feeling private and that's fine, but you shouldn't feel as if you have to put other people's comfort before your own when it comes to your health situation.

Your friend's issues are her issues. Perhaps she is afraid of recurrance and doesn't want to hear of anybody having problems after their treatment is over because it makes her think she could have future problems and she wants to believe treatment over = everything fine. Or perhaps she is worried about you and trying to convince herself you are fine and doesn't like any suggestion otherwise. Or perhaps she has difficulty expressing her feelings and sees it as somehow "shameful" to do so. But whatever her reason, that's her issue and something she needs to work on. You shouldn't have to accommodate her on the topic of your health.

The closest I had was my brother's response when I had a cancer scare (that thankfully turned out to be nothing). I think it his case, it was because our dad had major health anxiety and always got really worried about the slightest thing and my brother was afraid I was developing the same thing and didn't want to have to deal with another number of decades of constantly hearing "I've cut my finger; should I go and see the doctor? Do you think it will be OK? Look at it." 

That was about him and his concerns and the same is true with your friend. Given that she had cancer herself, I am guessing it is related to how she feels about that. 

Only you can decide what is right for you to do. What is right for her may very well not be right for you.

No, you should definitely not feel you have to pretend to feel something you don't. If you wanted to, that would be different; some people prefer to keep how they are feeling private and that's fine, but you shouldn't feel as if you have to put other people's comfort before your own when it comes to your health situation.

Your friend's issues are her issues. Perhaps she is afraid of recurrance and doesn't want to hear of anybody having problems after their treatment is over because it makes her think she could have future problems and she wants to believe treatment over = everything fine. Or perhaps she is worried about you and trying to convince herself you are fine and doesn't like any suggestion otherwise. Or perhaps she has difficulty expressing her feelings and sees it as somehow "shameful" to do so. But whatever her reason, that's her issue and something she needs to work on. You shouldn't have to accommodate her on the topic of your health.

The closest I had was my brother's response when I had a cancer scare (that thankfully turned out to be nothing). I think it his case, it was because our dad had major health anxiety and always got really worried about the slightest thing and my brother was afraid I was developing the same thing and didn't want to have to deal with another number of decades of constantly hearing "I've cut my finger; should I go and see the doctor? Do you think it will be OK? Look at it." 

That was about him and his concerns and the same is true with your friend. Given that she had cancer herself, I am guessing it is related to how she feels about that. 

Only you can decide what is right for you to do. What is right for her may very well not be right for you.

Hello MargaretMary thank you for sharing your insights and experience.. I tend to vary my responses to the 'how are you'' questions depending on who is asking. Im truthful to close friends and family but more likely to say 'im fine' to those I dont know very well. You have given me new perspectives on my friends response that I hadn't considered and this may help me to be more forgiving and compassionate with her going forward. I was annoyed and hurt by her response  but now I feel less so as she may be dealing with her own issues too.

Thank you and stay strong

Mx