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Am I feeling sorry for myself?

Debbie09
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Hi I'm 8 months post radiotherapy for throat cancer. My throat is still sore and swollen. 4weeks ago I fell down the stairs and broke my wrist the thing is my family ( not my husband) have all thought I'm ok now and breaking my wrist absurdly done me a favour. I was very stoic during my treatment and have tried to carry on but I still get exhausted (65) so the upshot is my daughter has started to ask me to have her children ( 12 and 10 ) which I have been doing but I get very tired and my husband said to tell her but I can't I don't want her to feel bad and because it's been nearly a year since my diagnosis I feel they probably think well your over it now get on with it and the thing is I agree my head says I should indeed be over it now but my body disagreess. So the thing is I don't know what's right or wrong or how I should feel and it's really bringing me down. I wonder if anyone else has experienced the same thing especially with the expectation of there family oh and on top of that I feel guilty about feeling like this can anyone help please

kindest regards Debbie x

t

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    Debbie - we are all different and are able to recover in different ways. When I had mouth cancer in 2014 followed by radiotherapy I found that the radiotherapy really affected my energy levels. I couldn't believe how tired I felt all the time - I was only 64 then. I was lucky that some time after the finish of radiotherapy I was able to get back to normal, but as I said we are all different and I believe that having cancer once it is never quite out of your mind that 'it may come back'. I would not be surprised to find that could be affecting you in ways you might not expect. Anyway, you're entitled to feel sorry for youself now and again! It would not do any harm to explain to your daughter that despite the time since your operation and radiotherapy that you are inexplicably more easily tired out. Try to keep strong and looking forward to a good future.

  • Offline in reply to 5MouthCancers

    Hello Thankyou so much for replying to my post and thankyou for your understanding it really helps. I will talk to my daughter I feel sure she will understand. My husband said he read somewhere that it could take a year for the effects of radiotherapy to abate phew!!! long time. Once again I'm very grateful for your help and advice

    kind regards Debbie

  • Offline in reply to Debbie09

    Debbie - good luck in the future - try to keep smiling (it isn't always possible!).

    Tony

  • Offline in reply to 5MouthCancers

    Thankyou Tony, your right it's not always possible but I think it helps when there are people like you in it who take time out to help and advise someone

    kind regards Debbie 

  • Offline in reply to Debbie09

    Hi after treatment we call it the new normal things are rarely the same nomater what we do, so we try to get back to old normal but not many do, you definitely want to relax more and if you feel good then do bit more but be careful and if you start struggling stop don't keep trying to keep going. 

    Good luck for your future and hope energy improves. 

    Keep positive and sure. 

    Billy 

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  • Offline in reply to Debbie09

    Hi after treatment we call it the new normal things are rarely the same nomater what we do, so we try to get back to old normal but not many do, you definitely want to relax more and if you feel good then do bit more but be careful and if you start struggling stop don't keep trying to keep going. 

    Good luck for your future and hope energy improves. 

    Keep positive and sure. 

    Billy 

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