Hi Brian

Enjoyed the thought of you being chased by the lawn-mowing wife (sorry). I was far too lazy and the mower stayed in the garage so will have to face that another day. Telling  myself it will mow better if the grass is longer ha ha! Have just prepared lots of veg for my dinner (mushrooms, carrots, parsnip, new potatoes and sprouts). The weather really helping with the healthy eating lark. I feel like I am taking part in an experiment for six months. It will  be interesting to see if it really does affect my cholesterol level when I go back sometime in October for re-check.  Course, if it hasn't  my attack of Brianitis could be HUGE.

  I now have a male blackbird (hubby nicknamed him roadrunner) coming to within a foot of my sun lounger to pick up suet pieces. He sits on our fence singing for a couple of minutes as if to let me know he is around and then I throw a few suet bitson the grass which he gobbles up and then flys off till the next time.

Well back to getting our meal ready. Have a good week and hope all is well with you and the family.  all the best Jules

Hi Jules,

Hope you are okay today. I have just read something in the cancer research site about anxiety being a  bigger risk than depression and it also state that the partners of cancer sufferers face a higher risk of anxiety than the suffers themselves, something I have felt for a long time. The article is on the right hand side of the page when you sign in and is titled "Anxiety's a greater risk than depression for long term cancer sufferers".

My wife didn't manage to catch me with the lawn mower incidentally Jules Hope you enjoyed you meal. We have got the two oldest grandchildren coming to us this afternoon after school for dinner. I am not kidding you Jules, I have never see two youngsters put away so much food. As soon as they step inside our door they usually say "what can we have to eat nanny, we're absolutely starving". They try to tell us they are not fed at home but I know this to be untrue. My granddaughter is turning out like me in that she has developed a liking for nuts, so I have to find a new hiding place for them each week now. Pringles might be made for sharing but not nuts, at least not my nuts.!!!!!!!!!

Anyway take care Jules, have a great week and hope you get to spend a peace filled time in you oasis of calm, best wishes, Brian

Morning Brian

Hope there are still nuts in the  larder after visiting grandchildren came by.  My son and now my grandson love to check out the fridge when they come round and eat well but with all their energy (oh to be young again!!) they have no weight problems lucky things.  I am enjoying planning my new style meals (and eating them) though cooking two separate meals some nights (hubby needs lots more calories!!) is a bit of a juggling act.  Soon I will switch more of my meals to salads (another of hubby's pet hates) so I will be cooking for one.  Have found it easier to drop the naughty foods between meals than I had thought  but when I fancy a treat (usually at weekends) I try to incorporate it into my mealtimes.  My weight has steadied so suspect I need to up the exercise so maybe the lawn will get mowed after all.

With the weather looking set fair for the weekend (and no set plans apart from the usual visit to Mum) my escape route to the back garden is ready and waiting.Have already got the sunscreen ready as I dont want to look like a dried prune and, of course need to protect the skin.  Have a lovely restful weekend and will chat soon. Best wishes Jules

Hi Jules.

So good to see you seem to have regained your usual serene equilibrium in this thread. That's what has always struck me about you: you always seem grounded,, pragmatic & wise - in what must be very challenging, heartbreaking times for you.  My own emotions sometimes shoot up so high that I  feel I've landed on a parallel universe (being Italian doesn't help much either!).

I wish you a happy, enjoyable weekend- you absolutely do deserve it!

Hi Serena,

Am feeling a lot more levelled today!  Think we all have to accept that there will be highs and lows during both the cancer journey and life in general. Sometimes (like last weekend) you just find it that bit harder to keep storing the emotions, hence the rant!!  But if you cant do it on here then where.   Think sometimes life deals funny cards and no doubt another rant due to down days will be out there somewhere but for now feeling better able to cope (could be its my hormones/age playing its part too).. Hope you too have a peaceful weekend and thank you for your kind words.Jules

Hi Jules I feel so bad , I have been on here since your first post and hadnt seen it.I am glad to read that things have picked up for you since but would like to send some extra hugs to you.I dont really look through lots of posts as I usually, as I am now, come on this site whilest sat in the room with John and I feel a bit secretive when I, m on, a bit like talking behind his back .so I usually just have a quick look, which is why I have only just posted to you .I think lots of people are happy to be there for you for a change.take care Jules xxxnite nite x Tonic( ooh I am so long winded sometimes!!!!

Jules - so glad to see you are feeling better. It's supposed to be a nice warm weekend so enjoy the sunshine and I hope things continue to stay calm for you. Sending you lots of love and good wishes. Max x

Hi Tonic

Please dont feel bad, we all have days like this and I did not want to put my woes on an existing thread so thought it better to start a new one but glad to say the low period did not last long (definitely got more of my late Dad's' character than I realised).  I vary how long I spend on the site but try to pop on before and after work. I get flagged if an e mail comes in as the laptop is usually on in the evening.  Both hubby and I have our own (his belongs to work so he bought me one for my birthday and its a bit addictive!!!)  He knows I have a virtual band of friends on the forum and think he is pleased I find it such a support.  I did not have the courage to tell him how I felt but suspect my mood probably gave him some idea.  A leopard cannot change its spots so people cannot be expected to do it either.  Sometimes learning to live with the frustrations is harder than accepting life with cancer but hey ho.

Am off to have my hair cut and visit my daughter this morning (walk past her place on the way home so silly not to stop of a drink).

Hope you and John have settled into a workable routine and that you have a lovely weekend (the weather here should help).  All the hugs are reciprocated and do take care.  Jules x

Hi Max

Love the new pic with your daughter and you must as a family be on cloud nine with the good news you have received regarding the liver re-section (sorry its taken me a while to catch up (no excuses just did not browse enough).  I am sure everyone in your life and all your virtual friends feel the same. Great relief that after waiting over 3 weeks for this news you can now see your treatment plan moving forward and giving you a future full of hope.  You are an absolute inspiration to all those dealing with such a hard battle and proof that there are so many options to look at when dealing with Cancer.  Look after yourself and I expect that surgeon to be getting kisses and hugs in due course.  In the meantime I send virtual hugs to keep you going and also thank you so much for the support you have given me and others on this forum.

This forum is awesome at lifting the spirits and I am so glad I found it.  Have a lovely weekend.  Jules xx