Grief can be overwhelming and completely swamp us within it. You are still there, though, as you always were, and you will refind yourself as you work through this awful sadness and loss. In the meantime you may feel trapped by these feelings and at those times it is not unusual to think of how to find a way out. That's what the brain does when we are trapped. Please recognise your feelings as bereavement and loss and believe that you will find your way through that maze and also refind yourself. In the meantime, there is support available, please Google NHS IAPT to self refer for therapy or contact a bereavement charity or your GP. And be patient with yourself because what you are working through is very, very hard. 

Thanks for your message. Yes thats how i feel trapped. I'm no good for anyone, i dont want them to worry about me either, but i cant snap out of it. People, like my partner want me to go for walks etc with them and i do sometimes, but then i dont want them to see me cry when they bring my brother up. And then sometimes i just want to stay in bed but then i feel bad for not wanting to go anywhere with people.  I want to sleep but hate trying to drop off and then i dream of my brother and wake crying. And the guilt of going on with my life tears me up inside, because my brother should be here enjoying it too. 

Thanks for your message. Yes thats how i feel trapped. I'm no good for anyone, i dont want them to worry about me either, but i cant snap out of it. People, like my partner want me to go for walks etc with them and i do sometimes, but then i dont want them to see me cry when they bring my brother up. And then sometimes i just want to stay in bed but then i feel bad for not wanting to go anywhere with people.  I want to sleep but hate trying to drop off and then i dream of my brother and wake crying. And the guilt of going on with my life tears me up inside, because my brother should be here enjoying it too.