My dear Mum: 3 days from diagnosis to death

I don't really know how to express how I feel right now, I'm still in a state of disbelief that I could lose my mum so suddenly. Apart from a swelling on her neck that caused her not to sleep so well (and prompted a hospital appointment to see what it was) she seemed fit and well. She then began feeling breathless, had scans on Tuesday at the hospital, was told by her doctor the next day that the scans found a mass in her chest that was likely cancer and then she died on Saturday. Only 3 days later. I really thought she would be ok. I convinced myself that because she had began feeling poorly for only a short time that we had caught the cancer early and she would be ok. She died of cardiac tamponade, fluid had built up around her heart as a result of the cancer. We are still waiting on definite answers but were told at the hospital following her death that it's very likely she had a very aggressive form of lung cancer and prognosis would have been poor but I keep thinking if we had only just got her to hospital sooner she would still be with us. She was only 68 and full of life. It's hard to come to terms with her not being with us any longer. I'm 32 and have now lost both my parents.

Has anyone had experience with a sudden death from cancer like this? I'm just struggling to believe it's possible but know this disease is cruel and unfair.

Parents
  • Hi Dexter123, 

    Firstly, I am so so very sorry to hear of your mother's quick passing. 

    I lost my mum on the 5th October 2021 aged 58, just a little over 3 weeks from being diagnosed with gallbladder and liver cancer to passing away. I still do not understand how someone can rapidly deteriorate in such a short space of time. This is my first personal experience with cancer and it is absolutely horrendous to see how it destroys a person. If you were to look at my mum a few weeks before she was taken into hospital you would think she was in fine health - we have videos of her bouncing around with her grandchildren. I feel absolutely robbed of the time I got with her, but I'd just like to send my deepest condolences to you, losing anyone to cancer is truly awful, but 3 days ... I just don't know how I could move on from that. 
    I hope you're managing ok, please know you aren't alone! 

Reply
  • Hi Dexter123, 

    Firstly, I am so so very sorry to hear of your mother's quick passing. 

    I lost my mum on the 5th October 2021 aged 58, just a little over 3 weeks from being diagnosed with gallbladder and liver cancer to passing away. I still do not understand how someone can rapidly deteriorate in such a short space of time. This is my first personal experience with cancer and it is absolutely horrendous to see how it destroys a person. If you were to look at my mum a few weeks before she was taken into hospital you would think she was in fine health - we have videos of her bouncing around with her grandchildren. I feel absolutely robbed of the time I got with her, but I'd just like to send my deepest condolences to you, losing anyone to cancer is truly awful, but 3 days ... I just don't know how I could move on from that. 
    I hope you're managing ok, please know you aren't alone! 

Children
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