Hi,

 I’m really sorry for your loss. Loosing a parent is one of the hardest things to deal with in anyone’s life. 

My dad died a month after my 18th birthday from a rare lung disease, that was 14 years ago. I won’t tell you it gets easier, but it does become different. I don’t beat myself up over the little things anymore, and thankfully I don’t have the dreams he’s still alive and just pretended because he’s on the run lol. I think like you, for a long time I believed my dad would be coming back. 

I’m sorry you didn’t get the rest of the time you thought you had. That must be hard. 

Its ok to feel upset and find things hard. It’s ok to cry and feel emotional. 

Do you have a support system around you? 

Here if you need any support or just a rant 

pip x

Thank you for the reply,   I am really sorry you went through and are still going through that!

Like yourself i am young,  I just turned 20, my dad had turned 50.   I actually have a little girl on the way.   I'm absolutely devastated that he isn't here to see her.   I know he will be looking out for her    Its also brought me and my family something to look forward to at this time.   When I initially told my Dad he was going to be a Grandad he was honestly so so happy and it gave him something extra to fight for.

I do have my family around me and I'm grateful but i find it hard to talk to them..  I just want to be the brave one and be there for them all and be the shoulder to cry on.  I dont like talking to them about how i feel.   The only person i would talk to was my dad.. literally about anything,   How ironic.     I do still talk to him,  he passed away in the house and i find myself going into the room and talking away.   It may not sound so sane.. but it keeps me sane. 
 

I am also really sorry to see what you are currently going through.   My sincere condolences and i hope you are doing okay at this time.   
 

thank you for helping me and if you want a chat as well then fire away x

I lost my dad in October aged 63 having been diagnosed in august and given 2 months. I still find everyday so hard, some days I cry, some I laugh, some I smile and I try to remember the good times. I think it's easier the more I talk about him it feels like he's still here. So sad especially because he would have been becoming a Granda ! Hope your ok but please confide in that support network around you! 

Im so sorry to hear that,   I totally understand that.  Some days your fine and then sometimes it just hits you like a train.   Its always on your mind but depending on how you are on the day depends on what you do with those thoughts.   I've had a fair few laughs about things since he passed and sometimes its good but at times its hard not to feel guilty about it.  
 

thank you for the reply and i hope that you and anyone else affected are getting there,  slowly but surely!

Hiya,

I am so so so sorry to hear this. Losing a dad is so so painful and an experience I hate to say that I have too.

I lost my extremely brave and selfless Dad in October 2020 after a 2 week diagnosis of a very rare cancer at only 58 years old. I am devestated beyond belief and finding life so tough without him. I was due to get married in April 2021 and my amazing dad was to give me away. It's too painful for me so we have made the decision to cancel it. Life is just so so cruel.

Confide in who you can. I know what you mean about talking to your family, you feel you have to be the strength but believe me when I say it is ok to have bad days, it's ok to cry and shout and ok to let it all out. This forum is great and so many people with different experience. I have found such comfort in it. 
 

I still feel like my dad is coming back. I feel like he is going to walk through the gate at 4.30 from work each night and each night I find it hard to accept that won't happen.

its such early days but I am sure in tIme there feelings will get easier and our dads will live on in everything we do. Your little girl will still have the most special grandad who loves her very much. 
 

take care at this difficult time x

Hey,   I am so so sorry to hear that!!   I know it must be so hard and i totally understand why you's decided to cancel the wedding.     Whenever you choose to go through with it.  Just know he may not be physically walking you down the aisle but he most certainly will be there with you.  Watching on proud as anything!  
 

Just talking to my dad has helped me loads,  you know whether i fully believe in the fact he can hear me or not i just find it peaceful.     
 

I do agree i think these forums are an amazing place for people to come and talk about things.   Its crazy how many people are going through different situations but somehow it all connects and allows everyone to share their thoughts and memories. 
 

Take care as well and whenever the time comes,  i hope you have an amazing wedding x

My friend bought me a well-being journal, it really helps me when I write down how I'm feeling. Music has always been a great help for me so stick those headphones in and go for a nice walk

thank you 

How have you been doing this past week? 

Such a range of feelings must be going on for you at the moment! Congratulations, I look forward to hearing about a beautiful, happy healthy, little girl. It must be heartbreaking to know your dad never gets to meet her in person. But as you say, he's looking out for you all. It's funny because children can be very In tune to things or people we may not see anymore. I truly believe they do. So keep an eye out for that! And when she comes along, take pride in introducing your dad, show her lots of pictures, tell her lots of stories. He wil always live on through you. 

I absolutely understand your situation and feeling like you need to be the strong one or don't like showing emotions. I'm the same and do you know what, thats ok! As long as you can find a way or a place to express your feelings, you'll work through them. It might be on here, or to mates or just to your dad. And no that does not sound insane. I still talk to my dad. I get him a birthday card and a mars bar lol every year and put them on the mantle piece at home. I guess it doesn't matter how we connect to them. 

Thank you for your well wishes, very much appreciated. This place is fantastic for us who like to hide our emotions in the real world lol.

Hope you are well

Pip

 xx

Hey,  I'm doing ok. How are you?  Its good to hear from you!

Thank you for the congratulations! This little girl truly is a miracle at this time. I will for sure let you know all about her! I didnt know that but i will certainly look out for it now thank you.  Yeah definitely, this little one will know all about her Grandad and how amazing he was. 
 

You're right,  as long you are able to get it off your chest one way or another its good.. whoever it may be to.  Aw really?  Thats amazing!  Thats a great thing to do. Did he enjoy a mars bar i take it :D  
 

 We're yet to get my dads ashes back.  Once we do i think it'll be good to have another little send off for him. We are still to decide where we will spread them as we never really had that chat when he was with us.  Think that also made the funeral a bit trickier to plan as he never spoke about anything like that.. after all why would you at 50 lol.  But I'm pretty sure we made him proud and made sure it was everything he'd have wanted

I hope you and the family are coping right now. I'm glad you yourself has chose to come on here and let it all out and to also be there for others..  it really shows how great yourself and others are.   To be fighting for yourself but also for others takes so much strength and courage.    I for one.. am grateful you have took time to help me. 
 

I am always here if you need to chat or just want to get something off your chest

x