Hi, so sorry for your loss. And everyone else reading this in similar situations.

I know it's been years since you posted but I've just been through a similar situation so wanted to reply 

My Dad was diagnosed with colon cancer with liver mets already present at diagnosis 2 years ago, in October 2020. He had surgery on the original colon tumor which was successful & then 18 months of chemo to try & shrink/keep at bay the liver mets. He did really well on chemo for 18 months until May this year when scans showed it was no longer effective. He was put forward for a clinical trial in September IF he was well enough, unfortunately before this time he was hospitalised twice with suspected sepsis, it was concluded that it wasn't in fact sepsis but was in fact his own liver starting to fail & there was "nothing more they could do". He was sent home from hospital & was told to prepare himself that he only had "weeks" to live.
 

After 8 & a half weeks (so he did well bless him) we had to call an ambulance for him as he was in severe pain, I personally knew at this moment that he would not be going back home again :( He was admitted to hospital, the pain was controlled but 2 days after being admitted he was deteriorating quite rapidly.
 

I was with him for his last 3 hours..... it certainly did not seem peaceful to me at all, he was complaining of pain (despite the nurses administering pain relief), was very restless (which I do know is a part of the dying process), but it was the way he looked at me that still haunts me... my Dad who has always been my protector, the macho man that would never let his daughter see him suffering made eye contact with me & looked to me to be absolutely petrified. I can't get this image out of my head. After receiving his "final dose" of morphine the last 15 minutes of his life were peaceful, despite his Cheyne-Stokes breathing, which again I know is a normal process. But it is the hour before this final 15 minutes that I keep thinking of & can't get the image out of my head. After he passed sitting with him for a while, to me he still didn't look "at peace" after he had passed. I have not told any of the other family of this as as far as they are aware it was very peaceful... and I would rather them think that for their own comfort  
 

It was 12 days ago that he passed away, 5 days after his 66th birthday, today I visited him in the chapel of rest. Although he did not by any means look 'alive' I do think it really helped me going to see him today, he looked at peace, actually looking better than he has done for the last 6 month, it was nice for me to have my last ever sight of my Dad being at peace, with no jaundice (which he had for the 8 weeks before his death), and looking like the old him from 6 months plus ago 

So my advice to anyone that has the same experience of the original poster & myself is that if you are able to, and if you WANT to as I am aware it is a personal choice (my sister did not want to go to the chapel of rest), that it has really helped me today. And although I will probably always have that vision of him looking scared, seeing him at peace today did help me compared to 12 days ago 

His funeral is Tuesday, I may well visit him again on Monday, it really did help me 

Take care everyone xxx 

Hi, so sorry for your loss. And everyone else reading this in similar situations.

I know it's been years since you posted but I've just been through a similar situation so wanted to reply 

My Dad was diagnosed with colon cancer with liver mets already present at diagnosis 2 years ago, in October 2020. He had surgery on the original colon tumor which was successful & then 18 months of chemo to try & shrink/keep at bay the liver mets. He did really well on chemo for 18 months until May this year when scans showed it was no longer effective. He was put forward for a clinical trial in September IF he was well enough, unfortunately before this time he was hospitalised twice with suspected sepsis, it was concluded that it wasn't in fact sepsis but was in fact his own liver starting to fail & there was "nothing more they could do". He was sent home from hospital & was told to prepare himself that he only had "weeks" to live.
 

After 8 & a half weeks (so he did well bless him) we had to call an ambulance for him as he was in severe pain, I personally knew at this moment that he would not be going back home again :( He was admitted to hospital, the pain was controlled but 2 days after being admitted he was deteriorating quite rapidly.
 

I was with him for his last 3 hours..... it certainly did not seem peaceful to me at all, he was complaining of pain (despite the nurses administering pain relief), was very restless (which I do know is a part of the dying process), but it was the way he looked at me that still haunts me... my Dad who has always been my protector, the macho man that would never let his daughter see him suffering made eye contact with me & looked to me to be absolutely petrified. I can't get this image out of my head. After receiving his "final dose" of morphine the last 15 minutes of his life were peaceful, despite his Cheyne-Stokes breathing, which again I know is a normal process. But it is the hour before this final 15 minutes that I keep thinking of & can't get the image out of my head. After he passed sitting with him for a while, to me he still didn't look "at peace" after he had passed. I have not told any of the other family of this as as far as they are aware it was very peaceful... and I would rather them think that for their own comfort  
 

It was 12 days ago that he passed away, 5 days after his 66th birthday, today I visited him in the chapel of rest. Although he did not by any means look 'alive' I do think it really helped me going to see him today, he looked at peace, actually looking better than he has done for the last 6 month, it was nice for me to have my last ever sight of my Dad being at peace, with no jaundice (which he had for the 8 weeks before his death), and looking like the old him from 6 months plus ago 

So my advice to anyone that has the same experience of the original poster & myself is that if you are able to, and if you WANT to as I am aware it is a personal choice (my sister did not want to go to the chapel of rest), that it has really helped me today. And although I will probably always have that vision of him looking scared, seeing him at peace today did help me compared to 12 days ago 

His funeral is Tuesday, I may well visit him again on Monday, it really did help me 

Take care everyone xxx