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Losing my mother in law

Izm23
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My mother in law passed away a few months ago, and I’m really struggling. I always felt very close to her, saw her as another mother. And she always treated me like her daughter. Losing her was unexpected, we all thought she was pulling through. Ever since she passed I just can’t stop thinking about her, and I get this anxious numbing feeling when I realise she’s actually gone; that she won’t know our kids, she won’t be just down the road or a phone call away. But I don’t know who to talk to. I don’t want to bring it up with my husband, because after all she was his actual mother. Who am I to be struggling this much? And when I do it just makes him sad, which is the last thing I want to do. I know whatever I’m feeling he’s feeling a million times worse. She was the central figure in our extended family and I just don’t know how we will move on from this. I’m just so lost and needed to let it out somewhere, I just can’t believe she’s gone. Does it get any easier?  

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    Hi 

    I wanted to reply to say that it sounds like you had a very loving relationship with your mother in law and that you were obviously very close. I think it would help your husband to hear you talk about his mother and how much she meant to you. Don't feel guilty for what you feel, she sounds a lovely lady to have meant so much to you all.

    I lost my mother eight months ago and we had a very close relationship, she was my best friend. To this day I still cannot believe she has gone. My partner also loved my mother and they got on very well but he does not talk about her and this has hurt me a lot as I would love to just chat with him about her. I just wanted to share with you how it feels coming from my side.

    I understand about the numb feeling and the sheer anxiety of feeling that your mother in law has gone it's just awful. You have every right to feel this way you loved her so very much so it hurts to lose someone that was a important part of your lives. 

    I am lucky that I have my children and I talk to them everyday about my mother their adored Granma. It helps to keep mentioning little things she did or said or would have said. I think it does help just to talk even if it's just a few words it does let some emotion out. 

    Take care 

    X x x 

     

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  • Offline

    Hi 

    I wanted to reply to say that it sounds like you had a very loving relationship with your mother in law and that you were obviously very close. I think it would help your husband to hear you talk about his mother and how much she meant to you. Don't feel guilty for what you feel, she sounds a lovely lady to have meant so much to you all.

    I lost my mother eight months ago and we had a very close relationship, she was my best friend. To this day I still cannot believe she has gone. My partner also loved my mother and they got on very well but he does not talk about her and this has hurt me a lot as I would love to just chat with him about her. I just wanted to share with you how it feels coming from my side.

    I understand about the numb feeling and the sheer anxiety of feeling that your mother in law has gone it's just awful. You have every right to feel this way you loved her so very much so it hurts to lose someone that was a important part of your lives. 

    I am lucky that I have my children and I talk to them everyday about my mother their adored Granma. It helps to keep mentioning little things she did or said or would have said. I think it does help just to talk even if it's just a few words it does let some emotion out. 

    Take care 

    X x x 

     

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