Hi there ...

So sorry, you lost your mum to this crule disease... l know you will miss your mum forever .. and l bet your dad will too ... just because he's found someone else, it doesn't take away from the fact they had 47 years ... and he cared for her when she was ill .. 

I think life is like a book .. with many chapters and your mum was a huge part of his book .. I think your mum would want him to be happy again ... not waste away grieving .. now your dad's older,  he knows how precious life is as he's in the autumn of his life .. would you really want him lonely ... or want him to smile again after all he's been through too ..

Maybe he didn't tell you, because he was scared of your reaction ... and l must admit I'm really miffed his new lady would try to add you to her face book .. it's beond me ... but we can't choose who people choose to be with ... and even though no one will be as good for him as your lovely mum .. you havnt got to live with her .. and if you love your dad, you could be civil to her on the occasions you do ... for your dad ..  

Life is full of twists and turns .. but I'm sure if you support your dad, then you will have him in your life .. as so many fall out with a parent because of this .. and I spent 4 years on my own after my divorce after 27 years .. and the loneliness is overwhelming at times ... remember it takes nothing away from your mum ... you and dad, will keep her in your hearts and take her through your journey through life ... and if you have a heart to heart with your dad, and you listen to him .. you will see how much he loved your mum ... Chrissie xx

Thank you for your reply everything you said makes sense I just thought it was to soon I no it's not up to me to decide that and yes your right my mum would want him to be happy.

It’s different for everyone I guess. I lost my partner nearly 8 months ago and I’m no where near being able to even think about getting into another relationship again. There is no right or wrong way I guess to get over the loss of a loved one. You just have to find a way to make peace with that.

Hi maybe your dads trying to take the pain away with a relationship to fill the massive gap your mums left i lost my partner just over a year ago i i joined a social group and there were many ladies there that would like a man friend and it would have been so easy to fall into a relationship to help with the pain i i didnt as it would have bee unfair to them but as a man myself ive seen a few start with friendships it may last or carry on but watever happends you should be proud your dad stuck by and cared for your mum a lot dont .ivr met them to .so i would cut him some slack and be polite . I have to say the pain he is going through is about as bad as it gets and the loneliness is beyond what you can imagine you could just say at the moment your not ready to be in contact and leave it at that .but ime sorry you lost your poor mum and it must be difficult for you just try not to get angry it serves no purpose it only hurts everyone . Best wishs .paul

Thanks for your reply paul I no how hard it was for me to lose my mum and I no my dad would be hurting more mum was his life I just thought it was way to quick to move on. I have my own family my dad lives by himself so he must be lonely I will be polite and keep things civil.

I hate cancer so much it has pretty much destroyed our family I have 2 brothers and sister who all thought a new relationship was to soon the end of the day I no it's not our decision to make thankyou for your advice and I'm sorry about you also loving a loved one I wish you all the best.