Hi Andrea xx 

So sorry to read about everything that’s been going on xx that must have been a terrible shock for you and your family xx 

I think...it is well worth your while your son going for a review with his GP. They will very likely be able to refer him to someone lovely who works with young people who will be able to assist him to manage these thoughts. 

You are such a lovely, caring Mum to offer your son reassurance when you say you’re not going anywhere yet. I think he might well benefit from some expert input too - they’ll be able to give him the tools and knowledge needed to manage these bad thoughts when they come along. And....may also assist him to come to terms with the huge loss of his Grandad (which may in turn reduce his anxiety and get him to think more rationally about things). 

GP is definitely a good place to start - as stated in the NHS pages for children and anxiety xx as you can see...you can ask for advice from your GP yourself or you can take along your son xx 

www.nhs.uk/.../

(I’m not saying your son has a disorder by the way (the link just references that...!) xx

I do hope you’re all doing ok under these really difficult circumstances x 

Hi there when lost my partner i rang the local hospice spoke to head counciler as i thought they would be the most experianced at dealing with grief and death and i was right . Gps are not allways the first port of call you cant give a young lad drugs antidepressants can cause more probs at that age your sons having to deal with puberty which is hard enough but that on top the poor lambs thoughts will be all over the place sometime adoleants can talk to strangers more easaly and a specialist bereavment counciler may just be able to sort his thoughts out you can get stuck in grief

. Try spk to head counciler and see what she or he suggests they deal with it every day .its all about getting rid of the negative thoughts .only my views of caurse ime grieving myself and time is a healer but only if you do something with that time like counciling and coming to terms with it if you passivly sit back no amount of time will heal also gps tend to be people seen as authorative and he may not open up as starcatone said gps are are good but you get 10or twenty minutes they just dont have time to listen ime thinking back when i was that age i saw dr as a god it was a very long time ago i couldnt have opened up then .hope you can get some help for your young man i think we sometimes forget children feelings i think your sons one of the lucky ones to have you best wishs paul

I'm 16 myself and lost my great grandfather (my father figure) at the age of eight. Because of the way I have always handled things I suppressed my feelings, recently I have had to be speaking to my friends and school therapist as my grandmother who I am extremely close to has just been diagnosed with the same form of cancer that my great grandfather had when I was 3. Part of me always knew it would be genetic and pushed it to the back of my mind till recently.

The school may be a good resource to go down as all schools will have their own concellors that can be requested to be put on a waiting list but with grief it gets pushed through. I think the reason why the school is a good resoce to go down is because they know your son and how he usually acts so they probably would have noticed small changes anyhow but not have put two and two together. 

It may also be a good idea if he discussed feelings with people his own age that have gone through simaiar scenarios as they may understand what is going through each others brains and sympathise greatly with each other.

I'm sorry for your loss 

Sorry about your dad's passing and the effect it is having on your son especially.  I lost my grandfather at 13, he was my best friend and it really was a terrible time for me.  I sank into a deep depression but somehow managed to keep the appearance of being okay.

l love Natalya's response.  Really any kind of counselling would be good for him.  He's suffering from a fairly common anxiety and rather than saying appeasing words (after all, sadly we can't guarantee we're not going anywhere yet) it might help him more to learn to deal with grief and the subject of death.  It's a shame he's had to learn about death so young, but dealing with it will hold him in good stead for the future.

All the best, I hope you manage to find a way to help him.

LJxx