Hi Paul,
Oil of cloves or cloves may assist with toothache, but by the time you get this, problem may be solved.  Like your suggestion of a few beers to help out.
Son had his bucks night in town (scary place to be) but has rung me to say safe back in hotel phew!!!  Sometimes you can be in wrong place at wrong time and end up in trouble.  Plan initially was to sleep over here but got a cheap rate for hotel and could allow him to have a few drinks.  Hotel has a pool, I have a bath?!!
Had fun night as little sis face timed me, first time ever, getting more comp savvy as time goes on.  Was a good/different experience, but good to see her.
Went out last night to a girlfriends house for a meal and a few drinks.  Dice was ok next door, had a ball and left cat inside with radio and light on for comfort.  Had a sleepover and was up at 5.30 am.  Yes am an early bird. Girlfriend suggested she comes round here vacuums and cleans bathrooms and I do 3 hrs gardening for her, sounds good to me.
Today even though was 40 gypsumed lawn and watered half of front lawn.    Managed to vacuum though will honestly admit indoors is not my forte.  Would rather be outside in fresh air. 
Think I will need to buy some fresh flour for baking as think what I had will be past due date, that's life , into the compost will go , waste not want not.
Off to visit in laws on Tues again only 27 forecast, bit sad when they are better able to communicate with me than sis in law who is their daughter, they are probably too alike.
Just going through mobile deleting old messages.  In a way it's good that we don't know what life has mapped out for us.  We have to react/adapt as we do.  If someone had forecast to me 12 months ago where I would be today I would have told them they were bonkers. How quickly life changed.  Once again reiteritating we have to make the most of each day, the birdsong, the new growth, the weeds in my garden that I will remove, sorry Paul not preaching to you, but to my self.
Your cakes should be ok for Sheba, a little bit is ok as long as not chocolate??
Actually have some recipes for healthy dog snack....just came to mind, prev dog kelpie required healthy dog biscs.  Sheba should be ok on normal stuff.
Speech coming on ok,  will have to be sober when delivering it.  still have to find an outfit, will get there, wish the kids would let me wear vesty top,shorts and flip flops( too much Aussie influence). But alas will dress appropriately. Also mother won't let me wear anything that shows too much cleavage in her opinion.  Have been out when she has heightened my neckline with a nappy pin!!!  She is a hoot.
How did you do with the new taps at your sons?  I am afraid some men jobs are over my head..
All the best, time for bed, take care
Hugs to you and Sheba,  Kathy x
 

Hi there Kathy, you do make me smile with you humour and quips, the one where you say being dippy then immediatley say "dont answer that" also the hotel has a pool " i have a bath" you have a honest and down to earth sense of homour which is probably why your in-laws like to speak to you about certain things. Again another smile, Heightend your neckline with a nappy pin, bless her, 

Wow you are an early bird, 5.30am but its so nice you have time out for yourself, and even hlp out friends in their garden, you really do love your gardening dont you, and sounds like you do a profesional job, bet it looks amazing, I bet it was wonderful to see your little sister on face time it is amazing isnt it technology, brings people together, and helps with seperation. My grandsons love face time, they can go on forever, but get carried away sometimes wanting to say their bit and interupting each other.

So glad your son's Buck night went well, they can so easliy get out of hand can't they, it was so thoughtful and kind of him to call you and put your mind at ease, what a great guy.

I do understand about life, and once again you are right, but it is hard to carry on even though we know we understand more than most how precious life is and each minute of each day has to be treasured, but to be truely honest, and I know you have helped alot it feels like an existance rather than a life, i feel ashamed, guilty, embarrassed, what ever you want to call it, every time i laugh out loud the thought is there. But as i have said before since chatting to you on this line i have got better in dealing with it. I am making progress, and thats down to you so again i would like to thank you so much, hope i dont set you off when i say whats on my mind, i would never want to halt  or slow your progess with getting on with your life after your deverstating loss.

The sons taps are complete, a minor adjustment due to not having the correct fittings but we have had a chat and he now know what is required, but the taps are fitted and the water is flowing.

Got my skydiving jump date today, 6-5-15, 0930 hours so just hope the weather holds out.

Thank you Kathy, Take great care, you are a very special person with special values, Kind regards Paul x

Hi there again Kathy, sorry about my last post to you, I am offloading my thoughts to you but you have enough to think about with your son's wedding coming up, with all you have to think about in preparing yourself for that magical day it is wrong for me to burden you, I am truely sorry, please forgive me, I must think more before I type away. Once again, so sorry, take care, kind regards Paul x 

Hi Paul,
Hope you are feeling better.  How is the tooth?  Just tried to send you another pic of Dice but it's not working or it's just the operators lack of know how...
Glad you got the tap issue fixed.
Visited the in laws tdy which was nice, we turned TV on at 3 pm to watch the chase and the 2 of them promptly fell asleep.  Gee I must be really boring company....
Took an equagel cushion up for MIL which prevents bedsores ( I had two for hubby) as used on recliner, outdoor chair and wheelchair and thought would save me running from one to the next when he was still able to walk)
As she has bedsore on heel from hospitalisation I thought we could avoid one ( on bot) due to sitting too long as she gets up during the night and sleeps in recliner.
They mentioned they wanted to get her a stick, I smiled and said got one you can have, then mentioned they were thinking of getting a circulation booster for feet, guess what.... I smiled and said got one you can have.  So a few goodies I will take up on next visit.  
When I got home ( been away for 8 hours) Dice came in and promptly fell asleep on bed.
MIL has issue with swollen legs weeping after hip replacement.  She is not heavy so a vein or cardio issue.
DIL (to be) will drop in on them on Thurs for a visit.    She lives a further 40 km away from them.  She is a good girl.
Tomorrow I will look for dress to wear at wedding. 11 more sleeps till family arrive.  I feel like a kid on countdown to Christmas.  Oh my goodness there will be some cup pas and talking around the kitchen table.  I feel the kitchen is the hub of the home and have great memories of being a child with a Rayburn in the kitchen which you could cook on and also heated the water for baths.
Good on you for having date for skyjump.  I think you are very brave.  I couldn't do it.  I get wobbly stepping on a kitchen stool.
How's Sheba? Does she snore?
Went to bed last night and cat turned on touch lamp, little minx and after getting his cuddles snuggled down on bed but I unfortunately couldn't reach to turn it off. Grrrrr.
Your weather should be improving now.  Do people have rain water tanks over there?
I don't know how to put it.  To lose a loved one is so cruel, but we must go on.  It's like part of you is missing and it is, but we have to be strong and keep on going.  We have to be thankful we knew that person and are so much enriched end by that experience, and they have helped us in maturing into the people we are now.  I don't know if this making any sense...but we have to keep plodding on and we do.
Cat becoming quite vocal these days, it's 1.45 am and no way can he com into letting him out.  Good try though.
Well Paul, I will bid you goodnight and head to bed soon.  All the best
Kathy x

j

[[]]Dice on bed

Hi Kathy, thank you for being so understanding, it was a while after I posted my reply when I though what an idiot, fancy writing that, so I thought it was only right to send one saying sorry, but deep down I did think you would understand. My tooth ache has gone along with my tooth, lunch time today, but just bit into an apple and nearly hit the roof, think I have a hole in my tooth, at the top near the back, so sensitive, I am also off the paracetamol now so we shall see tomorrow if my cold has gone. Oh my god, just over a week till your house is full of love, laughter and tea bags, none of you will need a bed, you will be catching up all night, you are a very tough lady and you will be OK, my thoughts and good wishes will be with you. 

You asked if Sheba snores, she does actually, but it's a nice snore if that makes sense it's a sort of a purry type of snore, she really is good for me, so understanding, and so loveable, I lay awake at night listening to her breath, (purr,)snore)). And she is keeping me fit, I have a lot to be thankful for. 

Your last paragraph was word perfect, it is everything you said and more, have you ever thought of taking this sort of thing for a living, there is a lot of people out there that need someone like you, and you would be totally amazing, bringing so many people out of a deep sadness, I can see you name in the paper now "Kathy the Bereavement specialist awarded MBE for her work" seriously you have a great sense of humour, a way with words and speech, strong, and sadly the experience. Think about it please.

Rayburn oh my goodness, we had a Rayburn, I used to clear the ash away and grind it up into powder, and I'm sure my dad used to scatter it on the garden and add water to paint the fruit trees, or was I dreaming that bit, but I don't think so, you are a garden expert, bet you know if it's a help in some way to the garden.

Been driving the hospice bus today, took three to the hospice in wheelchairs, and it was Rose's birthday a few days ago, she asked if I had been given any birthday cake, I said I had not seen any so, when I went to pick her up to take her home, she had some wrapped up for me, now wasn't that really nice, such lovely people all of them.

Take great care of yourself Kathy, by the time you get this there shall be only ten more sleeps yippee.

Kind regards Paul x, by the way did get the picture, Dice looks nice and relaxed, funny but that's how Sheba is laying right now.....

Hi Paul. I did try and send you a message last night but lost it. My error not website.
It's so strange sitting inside and shows temp at 28 can handle hotter  weather better.. But too Scottish to put cooler on. Then again maybe I should.... I used to be indecisive but now I don't know..."
Thank you for your very kind words.    I could not train to be a councillor, it would take too many years and to much psychobabble involved. I just believe in speaking from the heart and if I can get the message across that's all good.
It is a bit hard through written text as the receiver can't see the eye contact and body language but that's life.
Had a few mates around for lunch and made home made pizzas.  Now too late to make home made dog food, but that will 
 be job for tomorrow.
10 more sleeps, can hardly contain myself. Don't know if I have told you of how this came bout - the family coming across- happy to tell you the story of how it's happened another time.  Don't want to bore you.
Just turned over to the Brit awards  no idea who the gobeens presenting it were, must say Madonna  for an old chook performed very well.  

Best wishes, Kathy x
 

Hi Kathy, didn't think I explained myself very well with regards to helping other poeple, when I go to the hospital Saturdays the volunteers there only have  twelve days training, basically learning what not to say, so I've been told, but because they have experienced the heartache they immediately understand how the other person is feeling and have the ability to give guidance and reassurance on what may lay ahead, but as you say your heart speaks for you and your compassion to help would reassure anyone, sorry i didnt want to sound pushy, it's just the way you have helped me, that's the reason I praise you so much. 

The last couple of days have been different, Sheba was jumping around on the bed while I was trying to set up to do a bit of ironing, so joined in around the edge of the bed, poor Sheba got so excited she wet herself, that will teach me,  so packed up,the ironing and because our cover blanket is huge I had to wash it in the bath, so glad it wasn't raining, so I could hang it out, and today when I picked George up from school he was sobbing, so off we went home and he was not well at all, I managed to get him to eat his lunch, but he was so teary I put him in our bed, he was asleep in five minutes, really felt for him. 

It's a long day in the office tomorrow, Mark pops in to let Sheba out and feed her so she's ok then it's home, a walk with Sheba and a bottle of red when I settle down the the next day it's hospital day, I do like to go along, as you have pointed out when we are chatting you can see their concern you can hear the compassion in their voice, hand there is h hug if anyone needs it, and it doesn't matter if there are tears, they are wonderful  Poeple.

How many of your family are coming over, sounds like the whole clan wil be there, well the more the merrier and it will make you and your son feel so proud, you will have a great time , and the very best to you all and I know you will enjoy every minute of each hour that passes, guess who tought me that.

Take great care of yourself, kind regards Paul 

Hi Paul,
You poor thing having to wash the big blanket.  how long did it take to dry. Poor Sheba too , getting so excited.
How's young George?
Mum (88) and 2 sisters ,63 and 57 coming.  I have 4 sisters and 1 brother and we are very close.  I intend going home in June 2017 for mums 90th, all going well and we will all be together for that special occasion.
Back in Feb 2014 when the kids set the date I asked if anyone from the family would be able to be here (I plan things well in advance).  Unfortunately the answer then was no, mum too old and the girls wouldn't be able to get time off work.  I did understands

 as it is a long journey. So that was that.  I was a wee bit disappointed but accepted it.
In November ( I returned to work 03/11) knowing that I was being retrenched with the rest of the dept I emailed home offering 2 return tickets for any other family members to come across for the wedding.  I thought it would be nice for the kids to have someone from my side of the family there.
Lo and behold next morning mother rang asking if there was room for 3 visitors.  I was beside myself, so happy, but wait there's more....  They had actually made the booking when hubby passed away but were not going to tell me till Christmas thinking my spirits would need a lift.  How marvellous are they.???  I am so very fortunate to be so loved.
I managed to motivate myself today and go to the shops to look for a wedding outfit.  I was quite disappointed at the materials being used and poor stitching as well as plastic zips and that was in a posh shop.  
Cut a long story short I found a dress which I will be able to wear again at a good price.  Yes there will lots of cuppas and chatting going on.  I will be packing so much into those hours.  One sis is a real night owl so I think it will mean late nights and early rises for me.  Mum would like to visit Adelaide museum and one sis would like a visit to the wineries.  Quiz nights are on the agenda and lots of time with the young ones. Ten pin bowling has been mentioned on the to do list and of course spending time with hubby's family.

better send this before I have probs.

Kathy xx