Hello Joanny

I hear you its my first xmas without my husband too

It really is one day at a time isnt it 

Having support is good ....I just hang on to the thought he isnt in pain anymore.....no one deserves that .....

Sending kind wishes 

RB

So Christmas Day is almost over. It’s been manageable because everything has been different today. No normal routine at all. That’s what my daughter and I planned because nothing will ever be the same without her lovely dad. But now that I’m getting ready for bed the tears have come. Missing some one you love is so heartbreaking. Thinking of all of you others out there coping as best as you can too. Let’s try to remember the happy Christmas times and focus on carrying on as best as we can. I know that’s what my husband would’ve wanted x

So Christmas Day is almost over. It’s been manageable because everything has been different today. No normal routine at all. That’s what my daughter and I planned because nothing will ever be the same without her lovely dad. But now that I’m getting ready for bed the tears have come. Missing some one you love is so heartbreaking. Thinking of all of you others out there coping as best as you can too. Let’s try to remember the happy Christmas times and focus on carrying on as best as we can. I know that’s what my husband would’ve wanted x

Hi Joanny,

I am so sorry to hear about your husband's passing and send my sincerest sympathy.

You've got the right mind set and you will get there. The first year after losing a loved one is particularly hard, especially at special times like birthdays, anniversaries and Christmas. They bring all those treasured memories to the fore and life can feel very lonely. Grief is a very individual thing and we all come to terms with it in our own time and at our own pace. 

I am glad to see that you have had your daughter and son-in-law to support you and to do something completely different today. I am sure that your husband will have been watching over you all with great pride at the way you have coped. You will never forget him. There will always be a place for him in your heart. You will gradually come to accept your loss. It sounds as if your life has been on hold since he died. You will both gradually come to terms with what has happened and begin to live life again - this is what he would have wanted.

Don't worry about shedding those tears. Crying is always a great stress reliever. Your Golden Wedding anniversary tomorrow will be another sad day - what a pity that he never made it to see this special day in person. Do you have a nice photograph of him? I found it helpful to have one in a prominent place, where I could talk to my loved one when I passed by. I hope that you can still raise a glass to his photo tomorrow and remember happier times.

We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Joanny

Well done for navigating this difficult day and still reaching out to share and reflect. I hear the positives in your words and agree everyday is new and can be a good day or a sad day .....but we are here and we owe it to ourselves to live the best we can 

I am more aware now that I have to be Mum and Dad for the kids even though they are adults too!

Tears come tears go but I try to see something beautiful in every day 

A flower the moon whatever makes me smile it helps me....

Sending warm thoughts 

RB

Thanks so much. Lovely sentiments! Yesterday was a much better day. I thought about my husband throughout the day but mainly with love and remembering good times in between some waves of grief. Yes big kids still need support! My grown up daughter is with me and is a great support to me but I’ve been trying to make sure she feels supported too. She misses her Dad so much.

New Year’s Eve to get through next! Upwards and onwards xxx