Hi Lou,

We're in the same tugboat, I lost my mum five weeks ago and we cremated her at the beginning of May. I am sorry for your loss and I am sending you lots of hugs, hope and strength for this particular time.

When mum passed away, I was in China (still am, flying out next week thinking I still had time but it wasn't meant to be...) but before she left us - I got to tell her everything and how much I loved her and that she loved me and though it was via Skype and down to this damn COVID pandemic and the various lockdowns, the last time I hugged and kissed her was in 2019 - I still got to say goodbye to her and that was something I am glad that happened.

I am sure you were there for your mum in the last stages of her life and that she knew you loved her dearly and she left this earth knowing this and that she isn't all that far away from you even now. I truly feel that my mum is still around albeit in a different and more spiritual form but I don't feel she has left me. I still feel that she is with me and that she is looking after her family like she said she would.

On the eve of her death, she saw her father (my grandfather) before she left us, her father had died 30 years ago this year and she was living thousands of miles away from him when he left us but she got to see him again and I feel too that I will see mum again one day when it is my turn to leave this mortal coil. I am 50, I probably have another 30 years or so and it will be my turn to go and 30 years isn't a long time in the great scheme of things, if we think back to 30 years ago, it's 1992 - a year I remember like it was last week.

What I have gained from this is that nothing in life is permanent and life is short, even for us, even if we think we have forever to grieve the truth is we don't have all that long as it is. I know my mum told me to be happy once she left and though it's hard at the moment, I will honour her wishes to the best of my abilities in due course and I hope you get to find your happiness too, Lou. It's what your mum who is looking after you now would have wanted, take care.

Hi Lou,

We're in the same tugboat, I lost my mum five weeks ago and we cremated her at the beginning of May. I am sorry for your loss and I am sending you lots of hugs, hope and strength for this particular time.

When mum passed away, I was in China (still am, flying out next week thinking I still had time but it wasn't meant to be...) but before she left us - I got to tell her everything and how much I loved her and that she loved me and though it was via Skype and down to this damn COVID pandemic and the various lockdowns, the last time I hugged and kissed her was in 2019 - I still got to say goodbye to her and that was something I am glad that happened.

I am sure you were there for your mum in the last stages of her life and that she knew you loved her dearly and she left this earth knowing this and that she isn't all that far away from you even now. I truly feel that my mum is still around albeit in a different and more spiritual form but I don't feel she has left me. I still feel that she is with me and that she is looking after her family like she said she would.

On the eve of her death, she saw her father (my grandfather) before she left us, her father had died 30 years ago this year and she was living thousands of miles away from him when he left us but she got to see him again and I feel too that I will see mum again one day when it is my turn to leave this mortal coil. I am 50, I probably have another 30 years or so and it will be my turn to go and 30 years isn't a long time in the great scheme of things, if we think back to 30 years ago, it's 1992 - a year I remember like it was last week.

What I have gained from this is that nothing in life is permanent and life is short, even for us, even if we think we have forever to grieve the truth is we don't have all that long as it is. I know my mum told me to be happy once she left and though it's hard at the moment, I will honour her wishes to the best of my abilities in due course and I hope you get to find your happiness too, Lou. It's what your mum who is looking after you now would have wanted, take care.