Hello there, I need to speak bout this because I feel like I'm going to suffocate. My dad has cancer of the bowel which has spread to his liver and lungs so it's become terminal. I don't know how long I have left with him and try to visit s much as I can. I live in a different town. I am trying to stay strong for him but he's becoming noticeable ill looking which is harder to sweep under carpet and pretend it's not happening he is only 54 and I thought I might of had at least another 10 years plus with him. I know I can't change the way life works but I feel soo angry and bitter and sad and I'm taking it out on the one person who is there for me which is my partner. I feel like I'm grieving already if that doesn't sound daft, when he clearly hasn't passed yet. I feel like it's not fair for any 1 to go through this. I have aniexty attacks because I keep thinking to when he has to leave me. And scared to get close to any1 cause I'm scared that they will leave me too. I don't know who to turn to, where to get help. Any suggestions please. I'm really depressed and like I said I'm trying to stay strong for him but I feel like breaking down.