My dad is dying of cancer

Hello there, I need to speak bout this because I feel like I'm going to suffocate. My dad has cancer of the bowel which has spread to his liver and lungs so it's become terminal. I don't know how long I have left with him and try to visit s much as I can. I live in a different town. I am trying to stay strong for him but he's becoming noticeable ill looking which is harder to sweep under carpet and pretend it's not happening he is only 54 and I thought I might of had at least another 10 years plus with him. I know I can't change the way life works but I feel soo angry and bitter and sad and I'm taking it out on the one person who is there for me which is my partner. I feel like I'm grieving already if that doesn't sound daft, when he clearly hasn't passed yet. I feel like it's not fair for any 1 to go through this. I have aniexty attacks because I keep thinking to when he has to leave me. And scared to get close to any1 cause I'm scared that they will leave me too. I don't know who to turn to, where to get help. Any suggestions please. I'm really depressed and like I said I'm trying to stay strong for him but I feel like breaking down. 

Parents
  • Hey kelly, I’m going through the same issue with my father, not knowing how much time i have left with him, he has bladder cancer plus heart problems, the only part that I can’t control is him refusing treatment during a whole year of both cancer and heart problems, aside that he is refusing treatment he is also doing everything doctors asked him not to do, he is 65 years old now, before the cancer he looked like hes 40 and now after just a year he looks like hea in his 80s and I’m still hopeless because i know that he is going through a depression state in his life due to the health surprises, and i can never try to speak to him about his condition because thats when he starts getting all angry at me telling me that hea fine when hes not, I’m alone in all this mess aswell, all i can tell you is stay as close to him as possible, these are the days where you need to be by his side. 

Reply
  • Hey kelly, I’m going through the same issue with my father, not knowing how much time i have left with him, he has bladder cancer plus heart problems, the only part that I can’t control is him refusing treatment during a whole year of both cancer and heart problems, aside that he is refusing treatment he is also doing everything doctors asked him not to do, he is 65 years old now, before the cancer he looked like hes 40 and now after just a year he looks like hea in his 80s and I’m still hopeless because i know that he is going through a depression state in his life due to the health surprises, and i can never try to speak to him about his condition because thats when he starts getting all angry at me telling me that hea fine when hes not, I’m alone in all this mess aswell, all i can tell you is stay as close to him as possible, these are the days where you need to be by his side. 

Children
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