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Unsure if I want to know husband's prognosis

Lindabobs
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Hi - my husband has recently been diagnosed with prostate cancer - metastatic- had bone scan & ct scan & we’re waiting to see the oncologist to give us the prognosis & see how far the cancer has gone.

I desperately want to be there with my husband for the oncologist meeting but, although he wants to know, I’m not sure I can face knowing how long he may have in actual years. I feel such a coward - I’m just not sure what to do. Feeling very selfish & frightened.

  • Offline in reply to Perfect10

    Hi - thanks for your reply. Sounds like your husband has got underway very quickly with his treatment which is very encouraging. PSA brilliant news too. 
    Nige has got face to face on Wed 15th Jan when we’re guessing he’ll be sent for ct scan/mri to see how far the cancer has hopefully shrunk before starting radiotherapy - just guessing of course. Hot flushes & fatigue are main things to contend with atm. 
    You obviously have experience because of your Mum - we’re very much learning as we go along.

    Thanks again for coming back - makes me feel not quite so alone with things. Wishing you & your husband the very best. 

    We live near Durham - it’s absolutely freezing up here - lots of snow last weekend & thick ice & frost now. Take care.

    Love Linda xx

  • Offline in reply to eddiel

    Hi Eddie - hope you’re doing & responding well to treatment. Nige’s radiotherapy starts on 17/2 so it’s good to have a start date. Four weeks scheduled. His ct scan next week. Few issues with blood pressure but seems to be settling down at last. Saw the Oncologist today. 
    Hope you’ve managed to meet your granddaughters but if not that it happens soon. 
    All feels a bit real now.

    Love Linda xx

  • Offline in reply to Lindabobs

    Hi Linda, treatment change OK, nearly 6 weeks now, fatigue and hot sweats, so going through the male menopause again,lol, and bone scan results encouraging, negative regarding ribs, and lower spine, they said, scan shows suspicious markers suggestive of cancer, I have damage from a broken back, lesions, arthritis and osteoporosis with multiple fractures to my lower spine, and I'm leaning towards a misinterpretation of the scans AGAIN.

    Only 4 weeks to go, so how are you managing the waiting, I know it can be tough, but it will be here before you know it, and he will get his tattoos at his scan next week, they're painless, and its likely Nige's RT will be very similar to mine, likely a slightly higher dose to a larger part of the lower pelvic area,  again this is painless, and the radiographers are so nice and patient and will help you through treatment, and if you have any questions or concerns, they will answer them as well, and if I can help you only have to ask.

    We, their  Nana and I have been to see our granddaughters twice, their gorgeous, and everyone doing well,  I wish I could send a photo, 

    As Always my best wishes to you both.

    love Eddie xx  

    .

  • Offline in reply to eddiel

    Hi Eddie - always good to hear from you & glad you’re getting through treatment. Your words always feel reassuring & make things seem doable & ok. Thank you again for your support. 
    I think we’re both glad we have dates now - 4 weeks of rt. Hoping after that we’ll be able to plan a holiday . 
    Delighted you’ve met your granddaughters - I don’t doubt they’re both beautiful!! It’s such a privilege to be grandparents isn’t it. I never had any sadly as both my parents were older when they had me but I love every minute of being a nanny to mine (3 boys & a girl) 

    Anyway - take good care - keep well & many thanks.!

    Love Linda xx

  • Offline in reply to eddiel

    Hi Eddie - firstly how are you doing? So much can happen in a short space of time sometimes - that much we have learned. Hope you are doing ok & coping with whatever has been sent your way. 
    Nige has just finished first of 4 weeks rt - getting to understand routine & learning as we go. Stresses like parking at the hospital been tough. Bladder/bowel preparation been interesting but ok. Sure you’re completely familiar with all of this. Been warned going forward not to book anything until treatment finished as side effects will be unpleasant. 
    We’ve been trying to find out what happens after this 4 weeks & so far it seems just psa tests which seems a bit vague. Hopefully there’ll be a ct scan too. 
    We took a leaf out of your book & went to The Lakes for a few days last week which was lovely.

    Look forward to hearing from you.

    Love Linda xx

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