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what self care do you do? I hit a wall today and feel frazzled, tearful and ill.

charlotte61

Hi, 

My husband has stage 4 lung cancer and is having immunotherapy as part of palliative care. the treatment and health care workers have all been wonderful and supportive. I am in my 60.s and am disabled and hoping to keep my husband at home . We have nurses in and out and someone from Marie Curie came and sat with him last week so i could have some time to myself- I used it to sleep. I am shattered and my own health isnt great. i can handle my autoimmune pain when i have slept ok but I feel i haven't slept in 4 months. I am comfort eating and comfort buying! I feel I have aged 20 years in this year alone. I hit a wall tonight and felt dizzy and ill with stress. I am hearing impaired and never really went out without my husband . you never really got one of us without the other. 

I need to see this thru. I live rurally and love it and know that with better weather i can sit in my garden myself and relax  and also get him into garden too. But tonight i just feel worn out with appointments, medicines , scans, therapies and so many people ( albeit lovely people ) in and out of the house. I feel bad saying that as I feel he is getting good treatment and that doesn't always seem the case for folk on here. I know it is just palliative care but i want to be my best every day for him and enjoy time . have others experienced this burn out?

Thank you. 

Parents

  • I'm so sorry you're feeling so tired and worn out Charlotte.

    Caring for someone with cancer, even with outside help, is still very tough, especially when you feel like you haven't been able to rest properly or have any time to yourself. I know it must be very difficult, but it's really important that you take care of yourself at this time as well. If you have any family and/or friends near by, don't be afraid to reach out to them as I'm sure they would want to help and support you in any way they can.

    I do hope you are feeling slightly better since writing everything down but if you ever want to talk things through with one of our cancer nurses, they're just a phone call away on 0808 800 4040, Monday - Friday between 9a.m - 5p.m.

    So many of our members know how challenging being a carer can be, so you are not alone, and I'm sure you will receive some tips and advice from the community soon.

    We're thinking of you Charlotte and sending all our strength and support your way.

    Kind regards,

    Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

Reply

  • I'm so sorry you're feeling so tired and worn out Charlotte.

    Caring for someone with cancer, even with outside help, is still very tough, especially when you feel like you haven't been able to rest properly or have any time to yourself. I know it must be very difficult, but it's really important that you take care of yourself at this time as well. If you have any family and/or friends near by, don't be afraid to reach out to them as I'm sure they would want to help and support you in any way they can.

    I do hope you are feeling slightly better since writing everything down but if you ever want to talk things through with one of our cancer nurses, they're just a phone call away on 0808 800 4040, Monday - Friday between 9a.m - 5p.m.

    So many of our members know how challenging being a carer can be, so you are not alone, and I'm sure you will receive some tips and advice from the community soon.

    We're thinking of you Charlotte and sending all our strength and support your way.

    Kind regards,

    Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

Children
  • in reply to Moderator Steph

    Thank you so much for your reply. I had a marie Curie nurse last week for a few hours and I napped and felt a bit better.  I felt emotionally stronger and was coping with my knees pain and then i twisted my ankle. and need my walker again. I will mange. nurses are trying to get some carers help from council for him. I know we are lucky.

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