It's a difficult situation as everyone feels out of control.  It's his Mum and if she wants to ask she will!  My two daughters wanted to do the same due to their Dad's negligence in Hospital but they respected my wishes when I explained that we had enough to cope with and all our energy was being used on coping with the cancer.  When it comes to it she may back down and if you are married then really I doubt they will discuss it with her as she is not next of kin.  Medical discussions are private and he would need to give her permission to speak on his behalf.  Let them sort it out between them, there is only so much one person can cope with and I mean you.  Let me know how it goes.  X

I've spent a few hours with him today in the ward. Seeing me has done a lot of good for him, he said he felt like he'd given up, but seeing me has brightened his day.

I've managed to shower him and wash and brush his (very long pin straight hair), which made him feel refreshed. He's also managed to eat more. I think the two main problems are depression and malnutrition. Of we can get them under control then he will be feeling better soon.

It was so lovely to see him, and be able to actively take care of him, rather than speaking to unknown faces over the phone and wondering if he's being looked after properly.

Didnt like the Jr doctor who came to see him, he wasn't very nice and I'm glad I was there to relate his judgemental, rude and "I'm fed up of this" talk into a way that my partner could understand and not feel like he was being ignored.

UPDATE

4:30am I received a phone call from the surgeon on call. They've found another mass in his colon. He's going for emergency surgery at 9am. He will have a stoma put in. He's already lost his ascending colon, caecum and appendix to cancer, now a mass has been found in his descending colon. I don't know if it's cancer or benign. Will find out with his surgery.

I'm absolutely terrified and distraught. 

I'm so very sorry to have just read your post.  I  can understand how distraught you must be, it's all so awful especially when you are coping with your loved one being so ill and unwell.  Please let me know how it all goes and I will always check in and see how it is going.  The waiting is the worst, I will check later today if you post.  I will always be here if you need to vent.  Keeping you in my thoughts, Terri.  Carol x

Surgery went well, he's now got a colostomy bag. I'm not sure what they found yet or how extensive the surgery was. He's doing really well. 

That's eally good news.  Keep me posted as to how it goes.  Hugs your way, Carol x

I've just spoken to the surgeon. They couldn't remove the mass. It's really bad. The options are limited. And this is probably going to kill him. It's very very aggressive. 

I'm so sorry that is not what you had hoped for. Can you still see him or are you not able to go in?  Xx

Please let me know how you are if you want to.  Xx

We saw the oncologist today. He's got 3-6 months, maybe a little longer if he's strong enough for chemo.

I have no words. I'm totally broken.