Hi guys, 

Sorry I haven't been on til now, I was just trying to get on with things and that has been successful but now it's dawning on me that it's very real and surgery is next I'm just waiting to find out if there is anything in the right side before they operate. I have a meeting on the 6th to find out and then I think I will get a surgery date. 
 

One thing stressing me out is the idea of losing my hair during chemo so I think I'm going to try the cold cap! Has anyone heard any success stories with it? 
 

Wow [@kiwirunner]‍ you've been through so much too, nothing is ever simple is it! I keep neatly passing out with biopsies! 
 

Stay strong everyone xx

Hi [@KimMarie]‍ hope your meeting goes well on the 6th and you find out more about surgery date. Not surprised you are finding it a lot to take in and thought of losing hair is a hard one too on top of loss of a boob. Hopefully you get some feedback on the cold cap idea.
I have my (finally) results appt tomorrow and actually already have a provisional surgery date (16 Feb) from when I went in for the original results appt on Jan 15 where it was complicated. I think that is on basis of lumpectomy and I guess tomorrow I'll find out if still that or mastectomy. Been doing pretty well but now feeling really nervous! 
 

Hope you are doing ok xx

KimMarie

I have been thinking about you and hope you get some positive news on 6th. 

I imagine you just want to know your treatment plan and get your surgery done. 

Take care xxx

Hi kiwirunner

Just to.say i am thinking if you tomorow . Hoping you get some positive news. 

Glad you have been doing ok 

Take care keeping everything crossed  xxx 

Oh my goodnes, could this experience get any weirder? So, yesterday I was set for my results appt at 11.30am. Had a call at 9am to say my breast surgeon was off sick and would I mind meeting instead with another surgeon I hadn't yet met, at 2.30pm. I was relieved that the appt wasn't cancelled so was happy to go. 

Unfortunately, my husband couldn't come in with me, as the decision is down to the individual doctor. At the results meeting that turned out to not be definitive on 15 Jan, she was fine to have my husband in the room but not the new surgeon I was seeing. So that was already off to a start that felt less good than I hoped.

Anyway.. (he turned out to be as lovely as the other surgeon I am assigned to) he cut to the chase and said both biopsies from last week came back with no cancer in them. What?! All the medical  staff from consultant radiologists to the surgeon have been telling me it looks like cancer and to prepare for that. I mean this is good  but also so confusing.

And it is not as clear cut as that as I am having ANOTHER biopsy next week and still having surgery as originally scheduled on 16th. Apparently the MDT are not too happy as the histology results (no cancer in the biopsies) are not really marrying up with what they are seeing on the imaging (MRI, ultrasounds, mammogram) or the clinical presentation (I have quite an area of tethering on the lower inner quadrant) so they want to get it out with a wide local excision (lumpectomy) and send off for pathology assessment.

The second area (upper outer quadrant on same breast) that they did the biopsy in the mammogram last week is the one they want to do again (ouch - I am still so bruised and have a massive haematoma still :-( )to rule that in or out for once and for all. At the moment that area is showing as a complex sclerosing lesion which can mimic cancer but can also be hiding little bits of cancer potentially and before they do a lumpectomy on the bit they do want out on the lower bit of the beast, they want to be more certain about this on the top of my breast. If two areas are still problematic, that may change the surgical approach.

This all feels totally weird when I was told to expect it was cancer, then told it the biopsies don't show that but everything else is not stacking up quite right. However, I am super impressed with how thorough they are being and they are very apologetic at how many tests I have gone through: assessment clinic, with mammogram, ultrasound and biopsies, MRI, two more biopsies, now back for a third round and then surgery. I get it though - medicine is not an exact science and they can only go on the evidence in front of them and I have confidence in their leve of skill and care.

My surgery will be in a private hospital due to Covid with the NHS team from where I am being seen now, doing the surgery.

So, much better news than I was expecting but also not clear really with more to follow!

Will pop back with an update after Thurs biopsy (have had core needle, vacuum assisted and now this one is stereostatic what ever that means but sandwiched back in the mammogram machine again for 45 mins or so. Nice. Then they are going to prioritise the histology report so it is back before my surgery and we either a) go with the 16th as planned or b) delay by a week or so to discuss new options.

Mentally and emotionall draining but it could be worse when I see what so many lovely women on here are doing through xx

I admit it. I am incapable of writing a short post haha.

Aw [@kiwirunner]‍ ive just logged on to see how you are doing and you've updated. What a tricky scenario you're in but hopefully you are now closer to getting some answers about what it all is. Hope you are feeling ok and the biopsy isn't too sore with already bruised area. 
 

I find out tomorrow if there is anything going on with the right side as well. To be honest it doesn't matter to me what the results are as ive still got a massive ordeal ahead! Xx

Oh [@KimMarie]‍ even though it is a big ordeal already you could do without the other side to worry about too! What has sparked the need for that investigation? Have you got any dates in place yet for the start of your plan? If you feel up to it, do pop back on here to update as you have been in my thoughts xx

My goodness what an ordeal you are having . I cannot imagine how much you must feel like your on a roller coaster of emotions. Gosh you have been through so much already , but as you say they are being so through and it sounds like your going to get the best treatment with lovely staff. Pleased your getting to go to a private hospital. 

I hope thursday goes well and you finally get all the answers

 You take care you are dealing with everything amazing xxx

Hi kimMarie 

I hope today went well and you have had good news xxxx