Hi Tracy. 

It sounds like you are having a really tough time and I am sorry you are having concerns about your mother in law. 

I was diagnosed with DCIS (pre-invasive breast cancer) in February and all my appointments have been in person rather than over the phone. The only exception being when my surgeon had covid so rang me when she couldn't keep a face to face appointment. This doesn't mean that appointments can't be over the phone and I guess this will differ from hospital to hospital.

Probably not much help sorry! I hope you get the answers you need x

Is there anything I can ask to see if she's actually lying? Something important? I need to trip her up somehow. I'm hoping she isn't lying as that's disgusting but she's not answering my questions.

Clearly, your MIL has a lot of problems, but there are kinder ways to approach this than "out to get her" or wanting to "trip her up" perhaps, especially as you say you've already "stepped away". 

If you have concerns about the children, that is a separate issue from this cancer business unless, of course, you are saying that she is causing emotional abuse towards the children by saying this ...  

The reason for finding about more, I feel, would be if you had a desire to help. But, it sounds as if your mind is already firmly made up. 

Also, are you the person best placed to follow through on this within the family? 

Clearly, your MIL has a lot of problems, but there are kinder ways to approach this than "out to get her" or wanting to "trip her up" perhaps, especially as you say you've already "stepped away". 

If you have concerns about the children, that is a separate issue from this cancer business unless, of course, you are saying that she is causing emotional abuse towards the children by saying this ...  

The reason for finding about more, I feel, would be if you had a desire to help. But, it sounds as if your mind is already firmly made up. 

Also, are you the person best placed to follow through on this within the family?