Hi BigJean,

A very warm welcome to our forum, although I'm sorry for the reason you've joined. I hope that your results on Tuesday can help to put your mind at rest. Even if the news is not so good, it helps to know what the next moves are and puts a more positive slant on things.

I suspect that the pain in your back is consequential to your diagnosis. We always seem to think the worst and develop all sorts of additional symptoms. In most cases this seems to be due to stress.

I have lost my mum to breast cancer and, have had 2 bouts myself within the past 9 years. Waiting for results is always one of the most stressful times of a cancer journey. Try to keep yourself distracted by other pursuits and do your best to stay away from Google. The fact that you are healthy and have never smoked, should stand you in good stead with any treatment needed.

Do please keep in touch and let us know how you get on on Tuesday. We are always here for you.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Jolamine ,

thank you for your kind words . I’m so sorry you lost your mum and you going through it twice . I am not going to let it get me down just back from a big walk with my family and I feel great . That’s the weird thing I don’t feel sick at all . 

I’ll let you know how I get on on Tuesday but I am ready to fight 

talk soon xx

hi jean so you got home and nurse coming into your house to get drain out yes ? That's good no infection I'm happy for you I have to wait until 18th November it's to discuss my treatment 9am in the morning will find out if they put a bus out for you I know when I went see dermatologist they gave me a bus could not walk up steep hill as I was at clinic they dialled a bus for I will phone tomorrow I'm pleased for you yes when I was in I was so cold 1 thin blanket asked for 2 more was still cold put on my housecoat and slept with it on lol xx

Hello everyone

I hope it’s ok to join at this stage but I’ve been reading your posts and you’re all clearly such strong inspirational women that I really wanted to join you. (My real name is Helen btw!)

I’ve been recently diagnosed with HR- (I think - it’s hormone driven anyway?) breast cancer. I had a lumpectomy 2 weeks ago but was told today that although the ultrasound scan didn’t show this, it has been found in the lymph node that was taken out during my surgery. Mercifully the margins were clear. Next week I’m going in for another operation to remove the other lymph nodes in my armpit. My mind has gone into overdrive thinking of all the various aches and pains I’ve ever had over the last few years.

To say this is the scariest experience I've ever had would be a huge understatement. I’m frightened of everything. My husband (Steve) is being incredibly supportive but I know this is awful for him too. As you all know though, some days are better than others. (Today isn’t a good day though I’m afraid.)

It’s been helpful to read all your posts and see how you are all supporting each other as it’s showing me that this thing can be kicked into touch with the amazing medical knowledge we have now.  

hi I had a breast tumour removed and lymph nodes I was the opposite not clear margins so another operation they removed cancer tissue but the I got told on the 25th of October clear margins was so relieved don't worry when they take out lymph nodes can't travel  I have had breast cancer twice 9 years clear in right then up pops a pea sized lump time I waited biopsy etc was I over an inch anyway now  seeing treatmen5 doctor on the 18th to discuss my treatment i would just like to say welcome there's women here will keep you right also not a big operation as you have already had the tumour removed they give you a premed so your nic3 and relaxed which is good 9 years ago they gav3 me liquid to drink never worked lol they said to me that's why you get pre med injection relaxes you good luck Lorraine xx

Hi Lorraine

thank you for replying - it’s good to hear from you. I’m glad you’ve been told your margins are clear now - it’s a big relief isn’t it. Good luck with the treatment plan. 

I was a gibbering wreck for my operation a couple of weeks ago but keep telling myself that I came out the other side & was very well looked after so I can do it again. My biggest fear at the moment is that it’s already gone somewhere else so I’m just trying to get that thought process under control. Xx

try and not worry they removed one lymph node already so I'm quite sure they thought you would be okay to wait for another operation I waited 3 weeks the surgeon said to me right after first operation you may need another I was praying no lol they called me back yes need another operation just say to yourself it needs to be done they are going to get rid of this dreadful disease you will be okay or they would have done it there and then if a high risk when are you going in warrior a good name Lorraine x

I’m back in next Thursday. You’re right - they don’t mess round do they. When is yours? And yes, they know what they’re doing and there is so much research now into breast cancer isn’t there. Don’t feel like much of a warrior right now but that’s the aim!!

To be able to talk on here to others who (sadly) are in similar positions may just help me cling onto the last threads of sanity I have left. Thank you. Xx

I read a lot of things on you tube the doctors there do short videos and it calmed me down the USA are so much in front I read a margin probe it's a white device can detect cancer tissue which is great Manchester hospital has it but hopefully the whole uk and Scotland have it too mean less worry for patients and less operations for surgeons the nurse tol£ me they also have a scalpel  with a light  called i scalpol that can show surgeons where cancer cells are I also just read last week the USA and uk top scientists are going to be working together yes they are more advanced than 9 years ago  next Thursday  good just enjoy your time I watch tv listen to music clean etc I'm back up 18th of November they will tell me my treatment then I'm expecting chemotherapy now after tissue was affected still if I lose my hair again I can wear a wig lol too cold to be bald lol xx

The research is fantastic isn’t it. So reassuring. I haven’t read anything about the scalpels you’ve mentioned but that sounds really good. The doctor today mentioned being involved in trials etc but didn’t go into any detail. I’ll definitely be doing something to contribute to the research when this experience is behind me. Steve & I have planned to do the moonwalk so I’ll have to see how I get on with whatever treatment I need but am sure I can shake a bucket somewhere at least!

You're right about keeping busy. I love knitting & it’s quite therapeutic really. I’ve never watched as much daytime telly as I have done over the last month - homes under the hammer every day lol! 

Enjoy chooosing your wig if chemo is in your treatment plan. There are a lot of pretty cool ones around now aren’t there? Xx

I am the same I aim once my treatments is over I want to raise 500: pounds and give it to my hospital you can buy stickers or a can from the site get involved after having breast cancer twice I want to give my hospital a little ty for looking after me I do put good things like jackets clothes etc into the cancer research in town same with heart shop unwanted furniture as heart and cancer is 2 bigest things but that's good you are going to do it too have a good sleep xx Lorraine

Am sure everything helps & I’ll definitely be doing more of that now too. Good for you for doing plenty already! I haven’t seen what can be bought on here but will have a look now. And I’ll definitely be showing whatever gratitude I can to the team who are looking after me during this experience.

It’s been good to talk to you tonight - it’s really helped me, thank you so much. Sorry to have been so self-absorbed - promise not to be so much like that in future posts! 

Have a good sleep too! Xx

Am sure everything helps & I’ll definitely be doing more of that now too. Good for you for doing plenty already! I haven’t seen what can be bought on here but will have a look now. And I’ll definitely be showing whatever gratitude I can to the team who are looking after me during this experience.

It’s been good to talk to you tonight - it’s really helped me, thank you so much. Sorry to have been so self-absorbed - promise not to be so much like that in future posts! 

Have a good sleep too! Xx

hi don't be daft I'm a coward no one likes an operation but when they give you the premed it calms you as you know and you will feel like you have only been asleep 5 minutes that's what my second operation was like yes you can buy stickers or the tin I could not put it in the basket for some reason but I will call them once I get my treatment I hope you are more relaxed I'm sure you will be fine lorraine xx

Hi Lorraine 

yes, that was my experience for the lumpectomy I had a couple of weeks ago. The anaesthetist was lovely - asked me what gin was my favourite as I drifted off! I spent a while sleeping as I understand they gave me morphine but mercifully I wasn’t sick (another one of my fears on the long list) so whatever combination they gave me really worked.

wishing you a good & positive day today

Helen xx

hi warrior yes the antithesis are good asked me what's your happy place answered in my garden said what kind of flowers was out I never answered lol it's great you have replied and messaged everyone on here so supportive jolamine is so supportive she is waiting on a test big jean lovely too they are brave had a bigger operation than myself yet they take to message you I hope your feeling calmer Lorraine xx

Hello Lorraine 

Yes everyone is so kind on here - yourself included. It really makes you have faith in humankind to see that despite having battles of their own, people can still take the time to be so supportive to others.

I hope you’re still enjoying your garden despite the weather getting a bit colder now. It’s the simple things in life that don’t cost a fortune that are the most important when it all boils down to it isn’t it?

Take care

Helen xx

hi warrior well I'm on my own got divorced met my second partner 15 years ago he died I got on perfect with him sadly he had heart failure my mum is 80 in early dementia when I can't go and see her i call her every day to say I'm coming down etc or meet at her bus stop I go into town once a week with mum do her shopping she has her wee chihuahua she got a clip board you wipe gp appointment etc her pills in a pill dispenser 7 days marked mon to sun so she knows she's taken them I only allowed my mum once up to hospital when I was first diagnosed she was shaking as she has hardening of the arteries in her head arthritis she's not able I had to get a porter to take her along with me when I knew I was getting second operation my sister in st.andrews took her for a week to keep her calm my mum and I are close up to now she's coping but very forgetful and she had a good neighbour too which makes all the difference my breast is still tender bruised inside but if it's not raining this Sunday cut some dead shrubs down I have white heather seeded roses fern tree weeping willow tree daisies lots of different shrubs I can't spell lol but it's beautiful spring summer I'm glad you like the site it's been a god send for me too lorraine xx

Oh my goodness Lorraine. You have known some sadness in your life - I’m so sorry, but you are clearly a warrior too and am sure a godsend to your mum. I do hope she is ok too - it sounds as though she has support around her too which is so important, and she’ll know too that you’re supporting her in the ways that you’re able to at the moment.

Your garden sounds beautiful- and you sound too as tho you know what you’re doing in it. I’m really glad it gives you so much pleasure & that you can enjoy it next spring & summer when it’s at its best. I hope you get good weather on Sunday. Xx

ty my sister has a 3 bedroom house in st.andrews all her family drive as I'm not seeing treatment doctors until the 18th of November my niece is taking myself and mum for 10 days I cleaned all the house washing up to date etc case packed think it's just what I need mum too I will do garden when I come back yes love working in my garden think once you reach 40 no more discos lol bars you get a hobby I feel alone at times but yet I like being on my own now can do what I like miss Tom every day but I have very good memories of him just want like you to be health6 I'm 58 but looking at your photo your only 40s nice photo I hope all goes well for you email you when I come back not talking my iPad arthritis in fingers would break it lol but you can chat to your friends you made good luck next week you will be fine take care lorraine xx

I’m so glad you’re going to spend some time with your family Lorraine. I’m sure that will be really lovely for you & a great distraction. Your home will be all ready for you to return to, too - how organised you are! I’m sure your loving memories of Tom will help you through this very difficult time in your life until your 100% healthy again. It’s nice of you to say I look as though I’m in my 40s! I’ve just turned 52. The lighting was good in that picture! Will catch up with you when you’re back home again, but you’re in my thoughts. Xx