Hi Stephen

To be honest having breakfast alone had been a feature long before hubby passed away (lunch and dinner too!!) as in the last months he struggled with food.  Now I am in the strange phase of adjustment to so many things that only time can help with.  Still on that day by day course and keeping occupied through both necessity and good diversions are available too.

Have been able to help our children too so motherly instincts still in use (being needed as well as to comfort is a very real part of the early healing process I find).  Have had sister in law here for the evening before her return to Isle of Man and now 'winding down' before seeing what tomorrow brings (apart from doing the laundry(may order a new washing machine tomorrow!!) and going on my usual bingo night. out).  Kind thoughts sent to you and yours. Jules

Hi sueanne

Day to day tasks help to keep me on the straight and narrow and being focussed on what needs to be sorted will certainly keep me occupied for weeks and possibly months to come. Not rushing but being practical and am lucky to be able to have the time to give support to those going through similar journies (though sad to know how much pain we all have to go through along the way).

Nice that you had your son and were able to treat him to his fave meal and walk the dogs. I met my daughter in the High Street today and after doing our shopping stopped for hot chocolate (and a cup cake for her!) whilst Zack slept in the pushchair.  Will certainly miss the treats when I go back to work!!!

Take care and sending peaceful thoughts and hugs.  Jules x

Hi Garf

Really sad to read that Hannah still has no answers yet and is being kept waiting - really horrid time for you all. Maybe another case for 'going higher up' to get results - just wish it was not necessary in every walk of life these days to achieve the right results!!!  No apologies needed for your sarcasm (I suspect you are spitting bricks inside just now).

Hope you find time for some relaxation during your 'busman's holiday'.  I have builder coming at the weekend to 'size up' new wall to keep back garden secure (fence resembles a woodpile!!) and hope to get the car moved too.  Highlight tomorrow could be ordering new washer/dryer - how sad is that ha ha.

Take care of yourself and hope you manage a peaceful break from the work stresses you have been under.  hugs sent your way and I must get some shut eye!  Jules

Hi Kathy

Good that  you have managed that 'first visit' to the inlaws - all the firsts seems to come with differing emotions I am finding at present.Hopefully now that your MIL is recuperating at home her progress will be steady and am sure they will enjoy family visits.

  Next week is turning out to be full of appointments so just as well still on leave.  Hoping to off load the paperwork surrounding the legal side of things as should appoint solicitors after the weekend.  This will at least lighten the load. Our eldest grandson, having  had one appointment at hospital yesterday for nasal cauterization has another appointment through to attend Gt Ormond Street Hosp  next week (this refers to check up into 'night rocking' and entails him being watched whilst asleep so I am having Zack so both Mum and Dad can be with him. 

Well the clock has turned onto another day and as I want to be up early tomorrow I had better 'hit the sack'.  Chat soon and do take care of yourself .  Kind and peaceful thoughts are sent your way.  Jules x 

Good morning Jules,

I see you were burning the midnight oil last night. Pleased you are hoping to order your new washing machien today. Mrs B loves the new one we bought some months ago now. Mrs B said, "Its so simple to use even an idiot like me could probably use it", thats not to say I will however:D.

When I went to see my youngest grandson, he ran up and gave me a massive hug; really made me feel welcome. I have another two meetings next week so still keeping busy. I am luck Mrs B doesnt mind me keep going out. While writting this I am eating a bag of cashew nuts as I have now finnished all my chestnuts.

Glad you have at last got some news on your mothers social service help. I hope this one is more appreciative of your mothers needs and also the affect it has and is having on you. Hope your grandsons hospital trip can help solve his problem. I have now had three e-mails thanking me for my speach last week which were much appreciated.

Anyway, take care Jules, I have to help Mrs B now with the hoovering. Have a peaceful weekend for you truely desrve it, big hugs, Brian

Good morning Jules,

I see you were burning the midnight oil last night. Pleased you are hoping to order your new washing machien today. Mrs B loves the new one we bought some months ago now. Mrs B said, "Its so simple to use even an idiot like me could probably use it", thats not to say I will however:D.

When I went to see my youngest grandson, he ran up and gave me a massive hug; really made me feel welcome. I have another two meetings next week so still keeping busy. I am luck Mrs B doesnt mind me keep going out. While writting this I am eating a bag of cashew nuts as I have now finnished all my chestnuts.

Glad you have at last got some news on your mothers social service help. I hope this one is more appreciative of your mothers needs and also the affect it has and is having on you. Hope your grandsons hospital trip can help solve his problem. I have now had three e-mails thanking me for my speach last week which were much appreciated.

Anyway, take care Jules, I have to help Mrs B now with the hoovering. Have a peaceful weekend for you truely desrve it, big hugs, Brian

Good evening Jules,

I hope after your late night last night that you are not too tired to appreciate going to bingo tonight.  As for ordering a new washer, there is nothing sad about that at all - - don't forget I am a man and so the purchase of any kind of new, electrical appliance is something to get excited about in my eyes.

Hannah was sent home yesterday but she has to go back as an out patient on Monday to have the test she was meant to have four days ago.  She has to self medicate until then using this Morphine substitute she has been on.  I will update after that although it will still take a week or so to get the results after that.

I do have work to do at home but hoping to get it done in no more than two days so I can relax for the rest of the week.  I am certainly spending a little time with a bottle of beer I was given at work to enjoy while I have a good catch up with Claire in a few days.

Good luck with the builder looking at your fence replacement tomorrow and having the car moved. So many changes for you to deal with Jules although my step mum has made quite a few changes over time since Dad died which has helped her to cope.

Take care as always.

Garf. xx

Oh Jules forgive my post on my site to you .....I am so sorry not to have known of your hubbies departure.  You know from the support you have given me how well I understand your current situation and my heart goes out to you.  My site tells of my joirney through this uncharted place you find yourself in.  It is difficult but you will come through.

All my thoughts and a big virtual hug

Ian x

Morning Brian

Am sure my neighbours think I burn the candle at both ends.  I love the early mornings (probably a throwback to not being allowed 'lay-ins' as I grew up) so am very often up by 5.30.  On the other hand I also like the late evening (could it be these are very peaceful times of days!!?) so apparently can manage well on short sleep hours.

Early trips to the launderette will,however, soon be a thing of the past as I have new washer/dryer coming next week (think my children are happier than I am( ha ha) as they really could not understand why it did not bother me not having one!  Still from a financial point of view it will pay for itself within a year.

My last week of leave next week is looking busy again but its a blessing to be able to sort some affairs out before having to fit them in around my hours.  At solicitors on Monday, at the care home for Mum's visit and now re-assessment meeting with new social worker on Tuesday and having Zack for the afternoon on Wednesday (eldest at Great Ormond Street for investigation into 'rocking during sleep' where he will be monitored whilst sleeping (induced) to ensure no underlying medical reasons.  It will be a delight to be awarded lots of cuddles and giggles for 'playing'.

I have mixed feelings about returning to work after a month off (its hard enough going back after 'a normal holiday' but no doubt will soon be back into the swing of things (will have extra cover at first so they are continuing to 'look after me'.

GP phoned yesterday to see how things are and I go back to her the day after my return to work so she can 'monitor' my 'mental state'!!!!!!!!  She should have met my Dad - practical and stoic - and whilst grieving myself, still feel quite able to bring comfort to others who are hurting due to hubby's passing.

Well, best go ramble with my other forum buddies.  Hope you and Mrs B have an enjoyable weekend.Jules x

Morning Brian

Am sure my neighbours think I burn the candle at both ends.  I love the early mornings (probably a throwback to not being allowed 'lay-ins' as I grew up) so am very often up by 5.30.  On the other hand I also like the late evening (could it be these are very peaceful times of days!!?) so apparently can manage well on short sleep hours.

Early trips to the launderette will,however, soon be a thing of the past as I have new washer/dryer coming next week (think my children are happier than I am( ha ha) as they really could not understand why it did not bother me not having one!  Still from a financial point of view it will pay for itself within a year.

My last week of leave next week is looking busy again but its a blessing to be able to sort some affairs out before having to fit them in around my hours.  At solicitors on Monday, at the care home for Mum's visit and now re-assessment meeting with new social worker on Tuesday and having Zack for the afternoon on Wednesday (eldest at Great Ormond Street for investigation into 'rocking during sleep' where he will be monitored whilst sleeping (induced) to ensure no underlying medical reasons.  It will be a delight to be awarded lots of cuddles and giggles for 'playing'.

I have mixed feelings about returning to work after a month off (its hard enough going back after 'a normal holiday' but no doubt will soon be back into the swing of things (will have extra cover at first so they are continuing to 'look after me'.

GP phoned yesterday to see how things are and I go back to her the day after my return to work so she can 'monitor' my 'mental state'!!!!!!!!  She should have met my Dad - practical and stoic - and whilst grieving myself, still feel quite able to bring comfort to others who are hurting due to hubby's passing.

Well, best go ramble with my other forum buddies.  Hope you and Mrs B have an enjoyable weekend.Jules x