Oh Jules forgive my post on my site to you .....I am so sorry not to have known of your hubbies departure.  You know from the support you have given me how well I understand your current situation and my heart goes out to you.  My site tells of my joirney through this uncharted place you find yourself in.  It is difficult but you will come through.

All my thoughts and a big virtual hug

Ian x

Hi Ian

Just lovely to see your name appear on my thread and suspect its just as hard for you to post but I really appreciate the message.  It was a long three years for hubby and I take much comfort in the fact that he is now free from the clutches of his disease which took his happiness away.  I am surrounded by the love of my family and friends (and the ongoing support of virtuality buddies) and now, like you, my life must be lived to the best of my ability. Early days still but so many memories to cherish and share with others - a few late nights of 'story-telling' along the way.

Sending hugs and best wishes and hope all is well with you and Julie in your new life.  Jules x

Hi Kathy

Am assuming you tried to 'copy' a picture over but a no show I am afraid (I have little joy when I try either and its only if I have  my daugher around that she figures it out (all to do with size of pixels apparently!!!) As you can probably see your written post is fine and I am sure your outfit will be just great for you  and it is you who needs to be happy with it (hark at me I sound like your mother now ha ha).  Just remember to remind your Mum/Sisters/ family from Scotland that they will not require wooly bloomers when they arrive to visit - no one needs fainting guests .  I can feel your excitement brewing and I am delighted for you all that you have this happy event ahead of you. Have a wonderful weekend.

Have been dropping bags into local charity shops today (and forcing  myself to leave with empty bags rather than refilling them!!)  Local recycling service is likely to be overworked for a few weeks as my Spring Clean is under way and am concentrating on the inside as when the weather improves a little I will be in the garden with my feet up and a book (just does not feel the same doing it indoors.).

Hope you and all your family both sides of the world are managing to keep calm and well.  Best wishes to you all Jules xx

Hi Brian

Well I did go out last night (such a routine is hard to break though once my friends move out of the area it will be something else to look into!!) but had no 'winner's luck'.  Still good to catch up and take part (you have to be in it to win it).  Today did my three mile stroll to the high street and back and tomorrow the Farmers' Market is on so, although I do not actually need to buy anything still hope to go out and stretch my legs as it does me no good to be indoors all day.  If its dry I may well walk further on and enjoy the walk round  Ruilsip Lido but will have to see what tomorrow brings.

Glad Brianitus is alive and well and with all your hardwork both for Wood Club and Cancer Charities I would say your nutty treats are a good reward.  Peaceful thoughts to you and Mrs B.  Jules x

Hi Jules,

Just a brief post to say I'm reading your thread and keeping up with your news, but for various reasons, haven't been replying.  Hoping to rectify this soon! :)  Enjoy your walk to the market - sun shining here in Yorkshire :) 

Love and hugs, Jo xx

Hi Jo

Thanks for dropping by and hope you  have managed some relaxation durimg the half term.  Of course that seems a long while ago now. Take care of yourself and though we now have some cloud have just finished sorting a bag of more for the charity shop and as they will be open at 10 am signing off and heading out. Sending peaceful thoughts and virtual hugs Jules x

Hi Jules,

I hope you enjoyed your walk today and got to walk round the lido. Dont worry if you bought something naughty, you fully desrve a treat after all you have gone through recently. Be careful though, you might end up with Julesitus ha ha,

Since my last post to you, I have made contact with two married couples I met while having radiotherapy where both guys had prostate cancer. I spoke to one of the guys on the phone and found the cancer had come back but in his bowel. He has been told they have sucessfully treated it. The other guy is like me doing well and it was just nice to catch up through an e-mail to his wife. Both people reminded me of the laughs we had while waiting for treatment. I was transfered to another waiting room for three days and they wound me up by saying I had been sent to the naughty boys room. Another laugh we had was I was given a blue patient's record book where all my treatment was recorded. These other two guys were offered them but turned them down. One of them asked me what was put in them so I told them and just happened to mention the nurse who did the radiotherapy review every couple of weeks had put her works phone number in there in case I had any problems. One of the wife said, "So that why you accepted the book so you could get all the nurses numbers in there. Whats it worth not to tell you wife about this"?????

I had my leg pulled about this for weeks and one of the nurses even joined in. One of the receptionists actually poped his head round the door one day for he thought we were having a party we were laughing so much. I must admit I played my part or even maybe more if I'm honest. They were a great bunch of people I met there and so were the nurses and I will always remember the time I spent waiting for treatment. as happy times, as weird as that may sound.

Hope you enjoy your second weeks holiday. Have you got much planed? Am making a small booklet with all the names of companies giving our club members discount and have only got to print them out now.

Take care, best wishes and kind thoughts, Brian.

Hi Jules .... Hope you got to the farmers market and bought some yummy things!  It's been dry in my part of the world but really windy today (the weather that is haha).  Our son was 30 today so he and his wife have been home for the weekend and we had a lovely lunch out. Sadly he was too hungover from a late night out with friends to get stuck in to the food - but he will hopefully learn his lesson one day! I have a pile of ironing waiting for me in the morning - yippee (not) - so plan to sleep soon. Have a good week my friend x

Morning Brian

Must have been good to catch up with the couples you met during your treatment and to see how you have all progressed. Nothing like a good laugh to keep you going.

I enjoyed my walk (well wrapped up against the wind) and was out around 3hrs so think I got my exercise for the day.  Was then going to get into the garden and do a bit of tidying but found myself doing more sorting out instead (has to be done ) and before I knew it daylight was fading.

As to plans for my second week's leave I had it all planned with catch up appointments (three in total) plus usual trip to see Mum and an afternoon with old friend of hubby's from his motor racing days (750 cc Club). However I am now awaiting a call from my son in law as my daughter was taken into hospital in the early hours of this morning (she has a heart condition that can cause her to pass out and struggle with her breathing but has been managing it well in the last couple of years). Apparently this time she appeared to fit so they are doing various tests(ECG was ok) and though she is feeling much better still experiencing dizzyness so in the best place. She is usually home within 8hrs so its a wait and see time at present.

Hope Mrs B is feeling a lot better and that you both have a relaxing day ahead. Jules x

Morning Max

Had a good walk (around three hours) and passed through the Farmers' Market, chatting to the regulars but managed to behave and only buy fruit and veg (cheeses/cakes were calling to me but I  need to get back to looking after my cholesterol levels and weight) and have just enjoyed a smoothie for breakfast!

Our sons are the same age (mine turned thirty 21st Feb and chose to go horseriding for the first time so his girlfriend booked a long weekend in the New Forest and he fulfilled his wish) and lovely that you enjoyed lunch out (just a shame that he could not face food ha ha- boys will be boys, even when they are men!!)

If you read my post to Brian  you will see that I am on tenterhooks awaiting a call from my son in law as to how my daughter is.  Though normally after one of these episodes she is home within 8hrs it often leaves her tired and understandably with two youngsters may need company/help over the next few days  so some of my plans may need to be put on hold.

Take care forum buddy, speak soon and sending virtual hugs  Jules x

Oh Jules,

Just to say I hope your daughter is okay and the hospital has been able to find out what was wrong. It must be very worrying for you and also for your family. Mrs B suffers from raoid heart beats which used ti make her pass out but the medication she is on has helped keep her stable for several years. But every now and then, she has to take another tablet when her heart starts racing. I would like to think it's because of me, but sadly it's not. It usually happens when she has overdone things or has let her self get worked up. It one of her many problems and the reason why I retired when I di so as I could keep an eye on her.

Take care and hope your daughter is soon back home, Brian.

Evening Brian

Thankfully daughter was back home mid morning. It looks as though it was one of her 'fainting' episodes but ECG was thankfully all clear and she was sent home to sleep and rest as her blood results a bit erratic and as usual blood pressure low. Needs to be kept an eye on and as there is no way she can rest with a todder and energetic six year old (son in law home today but does not have any holiday left and does not get paid), I am 'reporting for duty' about 7.am tomorrow and will stay until son in law gets home from work. She has lovely friends who will do the school run with the eldest and I can make sure she rests whilst I get plenty of exercise keeping up with little Zack. Fingers crossed with a well earned rest she will improve quickly (it usually takes a few days) and at least with me being on holiday this week I can help out(a few things to cancel but will work something out - her health more important though I will keep my own check up with GP on Thursday (can pop in afterwards if she needs me).

Well definitely going to put my feet up this evening and hope you and Mrs B relaxing too.  Take care Jules x

Evening Brian

Thankfully daughter was back home mid morning. It looks as though it was one of her 'fainting' episodes but ECG was thankfully all clear and she was sent home to sleep and rest as her blood results a bit erratic and as usual blood pressure low. Needs to be kept an eye on and as there is no way she can rest with a todder and energetic six year old (son in law home today but does not have any holiday left and does not get paid), I am 'reporting for duty' about 7.am tomorrow and will stay until son in law gets home from work. She has lovely friends who will do the school run with the eldest and I can make sure she rests whilst I get plenty of exercise keeping up with little Zack. Fingers crossed with a well earned rest she will improve quickly (it usually takes a few days) and at least with me being on holiday this week I can help out(a few things to cancel but will work something out - her health more important though I will keep my own check up with GP on Thursday (can pop in afterwards if she needs me).

Well definitely going to put my feet up this evening and hope you and Mrs B relaxing too.  Take care Jules x

Hi Jules,

Hope your daughter is feeling better now.

At last, yesterday I managed to clen the car (long overdue) and put the new front floor matts in as the old ones were way beyond their sell by date. Have collected Mrs B's and our neighbours prescriptions this morning. Our chemist is a really nice guy. There is something called Liquifruita with garlic that our neighbour likes and he hasnt been able to get for some while. However he told me this morning he has sourced it again so I took a chance and got her a bottle. She was so pleased.

My grandson has his pre-op on Friday. So many cold and stuff about at his schopl at the moment so hoping he doesnt pick anything up having waited so long. He told my son to phone me the other evening as he hadnt spoken to me for a while and he wanted to tell me and his grandmother to get better quick, bless him. Looks like the weather is going to warm up so may be able to get out into the garage to get some woodturning done. I have now got four craft fairs booked for this year (Six days) so must get my new items underway.

Take care Jules, have a restful week, Brian.

Well, second attempt to post - lost the last one for some reason and taken an age to get back on site so here goes.

Firstly just wanted to wish your grandson (and family) all the very best for tomorrow.  He is such a brave little lad he deserves the best possible outcome from his forthcoming surgery.

With the temperature rising I hope you will soon be enjoying woodwork again and letting us see your new ideas/creations as they take shape.  The wood club is very lucky to have such a hands on member and after all your hard work enlisting discounts at various companies bet they will all be queueing up to take advantage and the public at large can reap the purcharsing rewards at the 'fairs' planned. Good luck with it all. With an improvement in the weather and temperatures I am hoping to get in the garden and get first mow under my belt by the weekend (bit frosty here just now).

My daughter is improving thank you for asking.  Spent 12hrs at their place on Tuesday but yesterday she managed to do the school run and spent time catching up socially with a couple of very supportive friends (mums with children at same school). She now just has to wait  for appointment with local hospital heart specialist as a follow up (should have happened already and was told to chase it up!!).

I spent a pleasant couple of hours yesterday afternoon with old friends from hubby's racing days (70/80's) - he was co-driver and owner of car they raced (750cc club) and gave me a lovely framed photo of them both with their pride and joy - not the 'then girlfriend - me, who apparently took the picture, - very touched and good to remember happy days.  She has had MS since aged 18 and they are a devoted couple with him as her principal carer for many years now - both amazing in how they cope - very humbling.

Well, off for my monthly check up with GP in around an hour - still being kept an eye on but am sure there are more worthy patients that should be using my slot so hoping this may be the last pre-booked appointment.

Sending you and Mrs B peaceful wishes for today and always. Jules

Hi Jules,
Am so pleased daughter is doing better, but what a bonus it is that you
are able to help out.
I visited in laws tdy as their car is off the road and MIL had medical appt so was happy to assist. Only stayed for 2 hrs not t lhe normal amount as had tradesmen coming here plus son and joy of joys grandson.
We had 2 hrs together which was magic.  Picked some cherry tomatoes which he washed and dried and left here...?
Don't think I will be able to accomplish all I wanted to prior to family visit, but the house is clean not designer beautiful, bit like me...basic and down to earth. Garden looking good, see my priorities....  Our family are pretty good.  All we need are the basics and each other.  I think this will def be last visit as the trip must be shocking for mum and siblings are getting older.
Thank you for tip re olive oil on hands at night.  My problem is lacerations not just dry skin.  Note to self wear blooming gloves.  
Sis still waiting for test results but from her emails appears her mobility is improved.
Just trying to work out how to use timer lamps in prep for being away over wedding period.  Will have managed it by this time next week.
Take care honey
Kathyxx
 

Hi Kathy

Its lovely when you get the chance to spend some quality time with family (even short periods lift the day and leave you realising how lucky you are to have them close).  As to getting your home 'ready for visitors' they will only have eyes for you, you know that!! We do not live in show houses, we live surrounded by things that we can enjoy and that brings us comfort by having it there (that's why it's so hard moving things out sometimes). I cannot believe some of the stuff I am finding as I begin at the top (I have a loft conversion bedroom!!) - things I have not used or worn for so long I cannot remember even when I bought them!!

Of course you will work out the timers - cannot help here as never had them ha ha but then I have neighbourhood watch (head honcho lives next door).

Visit to the docs for my 'widow ok check' went fine until she reminded me that I needed to get the cholesterol checked as its long overdue (why would I mention it!!!!).  Comfort eating must now become healthy so that when I go for blood tests in around a month (she kindly gave me until after my holiday at Easter) I am hoping it will be okay (am digging out quick and easy recipe book for inspiration but cooking is not on my likes list - roll on summer when I can revert to salads).

Now this is going to sound really weird but as regards 'lacerations' as long as they are infection free (of course they are) you just explain that they are 'happy workers' hands.  I hate wearing gloves in the garden (always weed without them and then regret it when I look at my nails!!) but will taken the precaution of wearing them when I prune the 'pricklies'.  Also have some nerve damage currently in one of my fingers which GP says could take up to 6 months to repair itself (another gardening injury!).

Well thats enough rambling from me.  Take care and don't whack yourself out with housework. Sending 'healing' hugs.  Jules x

Hi Kathy

Its lovely when you get the chance to spend some quality time with family (even short periods lift the day and leave you realising how lucky you are to have them close).  As to getting your home 'ready for visitors' they will only have eyes for you, you know that!! We do not live in show houses, we live surrounded by things that we can enjoy and that brings us comfort by having it there (that's why it's so hard moving things out sometimes). I cannot believe some of the stuff I am finding as I begin at the top (I have a loft conversion bedroom!!) - things I have not used or worn for so long I cannot remember even when I bought them!!

Of course you will work out the timers - cannot help here as never had them ha ha but then I have neighbourhood watch (head honcho lives next door).

Visit to the docs for my 'widow ok check' went fine until she reminded me that I needed to get the cholesterol checked as its long overdue (why would I mention it!!!!).  Comfort eating must now become healthy so that when I go for blood tests in around a month (she kindly gave me until after my holiday at Easter) I am hoping it will be okay (am digging out quick and easy recipe book for inspiration but cooking is not on my likes list - roll on summer when I can revert to salads).

Now this is going to sound really weird but as regards 'lacerations' as long as they are infection free (of course they are) you just explain that they are 'happy workers' hands.  I hate wearing gloves in the garden (always weed without them and then regret it when I look at my nails!!) but will taken the precaution of wearing them when I prune the 'pricklies'.  Also have some nerve damage currently in one of my fingers which GP says could take up to 6 months to repair itself (another gardening injury!).

Well thats enough rambling from me.  Take care and don't whack yourself out with housework. Sending 'healing' hugs.  Jules x

Hi Jules,
Your healing hugs much appreciated. 1.5 days to go.  Rooms ready and only a little shop required on Sunday.
This am we have hens party at a funhouse normally frequented by young kids, Dodgems ,water slides , putt putt etc.
Thanks to your example I have started donating some of hubby's clothing to local charities, little by little and the rest will wait till family have gone.
Have just heard sis cleared to travel and have list of healthy food requirements requested.  Other sis will join her on healthy choices so no crisps or cheesy things.  Guess if they are going to be good I can join them and show my support.  
Didn't tell the kids there was a chance she couldn't come or may have to return earlier than planned for specialist appt.  
Forecast for mid 20's for first week of their visit then see a few low 30's on the chart, but will have the air con if wanted.
Must go and get ready to gallivant and meet up with beautiful DIL and friends.  I am lucky to have such wonderful people in my life.  I am truly blessed.
Much love Kathyxx
 

Hi there Jules, and everyone

I thought I would stick my head out of my clouds briefly to say a quick hello and check on how you are doing.  I have had a look through some of these posts over the last month or so and I am so pleased for you that your Mum can stay where she is, what a load off your mind that must be.  I am sorry that I have been absent and so wasn't able to wish you the best for your end of journey service.  That must have been so difficult for the whole family but as always you help eachother through.

I did hit an all time low hence my last post and things are still very much a challenge but I will do as you demand and not give up the fight.  I have my first face to face assessment with a counsellor on Thursday next week which I trully hope will be the first step in helping me get back to some kind of normality but even now that really does seem a very long way off.

Every time I check my emails I always hope to see one from this site to say that the P.M. is back but sadly that still isn't the case. 

Anyway I will leave by giving you and everyone here my very best and I will try not to stay away quite so long next time.

Lots of love,

Garf. xx

Grrr, just lost a long post when my 'internet' flipped out.

Second attempt.  Just really wanted to wish you a lovely time with the family, from home and abroad.

Let the home take care of itself and thoroughly enjoy the time with everyone.  Just love celebrations and am trying to imagine  what the 'fun' hen do  would be like (adults going back to childhood comes to mind - sounds a blast so hope it was! Have a truly wonderful get together and wishing future happiness to the bride and groom (even though I only know of them throught he virtual world). Have a piece of cake for me please.

Have found it quite worthwhile letting the charity shops benefit by my spring cleaning but when I do  not feel like tackling the job I wait until I do! Have attacked my wardrobe for a couple of hours today and was horrified to find how much I could move on (but now have lots of empty hangers (perhaps I should put them in the bags as well).

Spent more hours in the garden than I should have over the past two days as the weather has been very good -17deg today so lawn mowed and tidying begun (body aching but for the right reasons ha ha).

Take care, have a whale of a time with the family  both home and abroad. Love and hugs  Jules (sending with fingers firmly crossed this time)

Great to hear from  you Garf and to know that you are having professional help  with your demons.  Believe me I do understand how hard this must be for you and your other half (23 years in a home with a Mum with depression gives me a clearer window I suppose).  Have courage and take guidance and I really hope there will be a huge light at the end of the tunnel.

Hope Hannah is being helped with her health issues and that they got to the bottom of the problem.  I am sure you are worrying for 'England' (Mum does!) and wish the PM facility was enabled but they are having to set it up from scratch (Max has a petition thread which is keeping everyone informed as the Moderators respond to our moans and groans).

Am adjusting slowly to life as one rather than two and mutual support with children and grandchildren does help a lot.  Am enjoying the better weather as can get into the garden and am rebuilding my wildlife corner now that have new back wall up. Body aches but for all the right reasons, I think.

Back to work (again) on Monday following two weeks holiday (had to be used up or lost!) and to be honest have rather enjoyed the last few days but that could be due to sunshine.  Next weekend will be new F1 season (and Mothering Sunday - spent with both children as am being treated to tea and cakes) and will be strange watching it without hubby so perhaps just as well son enjoys it too!

Right am off to sort my dinner so will say all the very best to you and send peaceful hug.Jules x 

  Hi Jules.You are one great Lass always good to read your post`s I cut my grass for the first time today and then fed it .Fed all my rose`s and shrubs some are comming to flower now the chameila`s look great .Regards for now take care .george x