Hi northlight

Not an easy thing to do in my case I had surgery so friends asked how I was and I just told them -they found cancer cells.

I think that I would have still told them especially when I saw them. Just say I have bad news and will let you know the details when I get my treatment started. You will get support from some but you may find that some keep their distance.

once you get your treatment plan you could tell them then because you may not be available for things.

Hi Northlight,

This is a tricky question that comes up quite often, both in this forum and elsewhere.

Not for everyone I know but I told quite a few people at work and socially and asked them not to treat this as being said in confidence because I wanted people to know, if only to prevent any misunderstandings. This was especially important at work, because everyone in the NHS has ingrained in them the need to preserve patient confidentiality ... which can lead to some amusing absurdities

Once I knew all my close friends and family were aware that I have Stage 4 OC, I put a brief post about it on Facebook, just matter of fact - nothing sentimental or whatever. Not long afterwards, I was doing some fund-raising for a Cancer Charity, so I used that as a way of raising awareness, not just of my condition but of other people who are living with cancer. 

It now isn't such an issue, as most people I meet are aware of my situation and can either avoid the subject if they are uncomfortable talking about it, or ask me about things if that's fine with them.

I realise that not everyone would be comfortable with this approach but there's no right or wrong way to deal with this, or anything to do with cancer in general. As Ricky Nelson put it "ya can't please everyone, so you got to please yourself."

Best wishes
Dave

Thank you Davek and river 56.

 Being the Drama queen I am I might shove a great big notice on Face Book..... all over in one fell swoop.

I help with a couple of arty groups and our contacting is on F B, plus I use it quite a lot.   I think I shall wait for my programme and then strike while the iron is hot so to speak.

I dont want lots of sympathy but I would just be happy that people will understand if I take myself off on occasion . Nice positive answers I appreciate them  x. 

Hi 

I had surgery first and kind of went down the same road as river saying they found some cancer cells, however I did put a post on FB and was open about everything for the same reason you thinking.  I got so much support and made it clear I wanted no sympathy just understanding if I pulled away or wasn't well enough to go to a wedding or birthday party. It worked for me. Plus I felt I was bringing awareness and one should never think it would never be you I was 45 when diagnosed with bowel cancer and now chemo is done I'm continuing like I did before, 

good luck please keep us updated

JB

Hello Northlight, how are you?  Not heard from you since your holiday (which I hope you enjoyed!) so have been wondering if you are getting on okay.  I am also missing your beautiful paintings! 

Take care, Hazel xx

Thank you Hazel.  Its nice to hear from you.  I had a great holiday though I did get tired .  Had my op within three days of being home and they seem to have removed all of the tumour.   They are very happy with me, could not see any adverse anything else.  

I feel both lucky and blessed.  Also that I dont really belong here anymore , so many people facing an unsure future and me getting off so lightly ( they will do tests over the next five years) . This is a pic specially for everyone here, it was part of a bunch of floweres sent to me after I came out of hospital. Sent to me by my lovely sister in law.   I shall keep on looking and chipping in, if I may, hugs.

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