O M G ... my heart goes out to you ... this crule cancer and it's best friend covid must be high fiving each other ... think this should be printed on the front page of every news paper ... sadly I'm sure your not alone... your sounding off for everyone in your posistion ... and I just hope something comes of your thread .. a small but powerful voice , in a sea of madness .. 

I've been feeling a bit angry every time I see people with no masks ... the last chap had a badge thing that said exempt from wearing one ... that's fare enough ... till I watched him light a cigarette up as soon as he left the shop ... please any one out there .. it's not rocket science... I have asthma and lots of other problems .. and yes it was hard wearing one at first .. but most of us can breathe slower and get used to it .. because it doesn't worry them, and they can't actually see your ward , it doesn't seem important ..

Well I'm sending you a vertual hug... and thinking of you .. if this thread makes even one more wear a mask , it did something ... but hopefully your family can pass your thread on to a t.v programme where it just may make a difference ... Chrissie  

Thank you for your kindness and support Chrissy. I do appreciate it and would be more than happy for someone to run the story. 

My situation is also further complicated by severe disabling M.E and asthma. My poor body is fighting so much but I'm a fighter and intend to live for longer than the upto 3 years prognosis

Barb xx

Hi there barb..

Well when I was diagnosed with a grade three breast cancer back in 2017 , i thought my time was up .. like you i have lots of heslth problems too .. and esp after my masectomy... a few hours in the early hours following , i was rushed back to surgery as an emergency... they got one and a half letres of blood from my chest ... sorry bout the graffics but i thought my sons face that day was the last one id see ..

But yep that strength we find sometimes from an impossible situation can work .. 

To me it's not about winning or losing this journey .. it's about sticking two fingers up to cancer and / or covid , and giving it a run for its money ... that's my last thing I'll ever do is stick them up and say ... you might get my body but not my sense of humour or my will to look it in the eye ... so then it can't win ..

I lost my amazing granddaughter Jess to acute myeloid leukaemia last month ... at 18 years old .. you know cancer never broke her will or courage and she smiled right up to the last .. she did the same ..although she lost the fight .... she won by never giving in .. and you have that courage .. I can read it in your thread .. 

Why I'm still here and she isn't is a mystery that just isn't fare ... but I'm trying to hold hands on here .. it's an amazing place .. and many read your thread who may not answer .. but hopefully your message will .. 

It's a mad mad world wer living in right now .. but hold on in there .. and stick two fingers up to .. Chrissie xx

Thanks Chrissie

I appreciate your reply and kind words. Cancer, covid, sepsis they don't discriminate and take, take, take. I'm so sorry about your niece . I'm 51 and think it's too young to die but 18 is heartless and so sad. I'm glad you're a warrior too. Most of us ladies are and it makes a huge difference. Positivity and powerful thoughts really help.

I wish you well for the future. Barb xx

Hi. 

So glad you've got the attitude to fight, most of us believe in positive thoughts and actions. 

I've been on palliative care since February 2016 still fighting just as hard carrying my uninvited guest along with with me.others have been fighting alot longer than me so are on here helping others along. 

I promised my darling wife before she'd marry me that I'd look after her when we were old that was nearly 50 years ago she's nearly 14years older than me and she took some persuading before she'd say yes, she now has parkinsons and Alzheimers and I'm her official carer.

Keep positive and keep fighting, best wishes for the future think of being home for Christmas. 

Billy 

What a lovely reply. Thanks Billy. I really have found this forum a breath of fresh air. So many people have encouraged me onwards and to alter the way I view my diagnosis. I have always been proactive but often a glass half empty kind of person. That's completely changed and here I lie putting all of my energy into something so basic as breathing. But I'm fighting back and today is the first day that I haven't worsened throughout the night. 

I WILL BEAT THIS 1st then tackle the CANCER!!!

I AS SO MANY OTHER BRAVE SOULS AM A WARRIOR!!!

Take care. Stay strong. Continue to thrive and look after your wife.

Barb xx

Well one baby step at a time ... keep in touch .. let us know how you go ... sending you a vertual hug as always Chrissie xx 

Thank you. I will let you know what happens going forward. The support here is amazing.

Barb xx