Should see the oncologist in the next couple of weeks meanwhile I am taking the meds for the other one. I have complete faith in my doctors so feel quite upbeat. There is some talk of having a new targeted treatment for the second one.

Afternoon gadgetgal :-)

been there done that on the pension front.

When I worked mine out if I lived beyond 10 yrs then it was more financially viable to take smaller lump sum and larger monthly pension. At time of my decision I had always been fit and healthy and on no meds. So... yup I took smaller lump sum option. 10 months later.... cancer diagnosis nd hypertension.!?!. 2yrs past November I retired so.... 8 more nd it’s a win lol. (4 more now till get state pension ...grrr)

I retired at 60 so although I did not get an actuarial pension ie not penalised..... I could have still worked and added 2 more yrs to hit maximum benefit. In addition I was thrown a bit because I was offered a promotion ( which in theory would boost my pension also). So.... sat with the organisations pension calculator puting in all the extra time and pay rise to see final outcomes. For the extra I got ....for me was a no brainier for the happiness I would gain lol. So I declined the promotion (didn’t need the extra pressure just before retirement) and set the retirement process in place.

in the light of diagnosis 10 mths later and how happy not to be working I was....def the best decision for me :-)

now.....something to look into for u is....can u retire on the grounds of ill health and get your pension boosted to maximum benefit. If I had still been at work my pension rules would have done this. Worth looking into :-)

I also had a spreadsheet with all my outgoings etc. Because I knew my annual pension was well a bit pitiful and knew I would b relying on savings to boost my monthly income. I needed to know savings would last till I got state pension ( so a 6 yrs gap). Delighted to say my math was right... the annual savings used to boost income is spot on. Go me lol. Could still spit at not getting my stats pension at the states times in the letters they sent 1st letter stated 60 ( nd so did the website) then at 4 yrs to pension new letter stating it’s now aged 62. Then at 2 yrs t pension new letter stating would not get till 66. Grrr but stil.... happily retired lol. X

Oooo gadgetgal..... cracking news on the all clear... chuffed t bits for u x ️X

Hi foxdale and a very warm welcome to the thread although sorry you find yourself here.

bless you lass.... this journey is hard enough without the added pain of decisions you and your husband  are having to make. 

It is of course the right one but none the less heartbreaking. I don’t know if post treatment you will be able to pick back up..so a suspend rather than end. ️

I know it must be another kick in the teeth to know they have found more on mri... but it’s best they know exactly what they are dealing with so they can give you the right plan for the best possible outcome.  

Of course you have cried.... I’d be more worried if after all the things you have had to process and come to terms with you hadn’t. 

So get it all out lass. Hold your loved ones close. When you are ready ( make no doubt about it you will become ready) look this in the eye and stare it down. You can do this lass. 

We are all here and have your back. Deep breaths for now x ️X

Thanks Sandra 123. I did look into retiring on grounds of ill health for both my pensions (two separate long term employers). With my current employer, looking at the form there wouldn't have been any point as I do not qualify. You have to be incapable of working, rather than having a possible shortened life expecancy. With my previous employer, I asked for retirement on ill health grounds and it was considered by the trustees and declined. Irritaing. Apparently cancer of itself is no guarantee of being able to retire on grounds of ill health. 

Hi dragonfly. 

Lass we could b lump twins... I too had 2 lumps  but different too 1 lobular and 1 ductal both invasive.

it sounds like the main difference is the size of one of yrs. you are right I too was very lucky as mine was found on mammogram- couldn’t feel lump, no pain, no visible changes....but there.

i went from the 1st recall ultrasound into the breast care nurses room nd looked her in the eye nd said.... I want a mastectomy ( only been told they were confident to say before biopsy results that we were looking at a cancer diagnosis 2mins before). I had no qualms whatsoever to have s mastectomy ( there nd then would have been my preference tbh.... I just wanted the cancer out done and dusted). 

Then....wk later I met the consultant who said happy t do mastectomy but.... should we explore other options first and then we will do whatever u choose. After all the facts etc- I chose lumpectomy. 

Now... that was me. It sounds like you are coming to terms with the possibility of a mastectomy...which sounds as good a place as any to start the thought process. As you say listen to what the oncologist has to say and come to any decisions together about the treatment you choose. 

I think I have mentioned before the lovely lady who had her lumpectomy same time as me..... she had been on the meds for a yr to reduce the size of her lump before op too. I recall her vividly saying ...I just want it out. I totally got where she was coming from. I know you too will just want it out..... you will meet the oncologist soon lass then the how can be finalised. 

You are will versed in the wait drill.... it’s sll about u. What u fancy doing not what u need to do. Sleep if u choose or climb a mountain if that takes ya fancy :-) 

big virtual hugs lass ... u will get there... just need to firm up the how . X

Afternoon peeps 

dizzel .... hows everything going....yes unlike Elsa I won’t let it go ;-)

just seen this image on fbook... today for me this summed up life so it is both my good and bad post . Have as good a day as u can peeps x

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Very powerful and true words! X 

Wow Sandra that’s so true ! Thank you for posting it xx

Good......feeling much better after a couple of grotty days and spring bulbs starting to show buds :)

Bad...none :)

have a good night everyone xxx