The good and the bad

Hi peeps

I have recently been diagnosed with breast cancer. Taking the excellent advice on this website I pretty much started by taking it one day at a time. This does indeed help. 

I thought to share the good and the bad and would love to hear anyone else's should they wish to share.

Today I had both a good and a bad moment. I received 2 letters in the post.

The first was from the hosp confirming my op date (my bad moment) cos my stomach dropped and I had that now familiar feeling of anxiousness take hold for a moment but shook it off cos I know it is needed. 

The good - my 2nd letter - as if... a tax rebate - boom  . Not half put a much needed smile on my face . Reckon a my treat family meal is in order.

Eeee it's the little things ain't it. 

Take care peeps 

Sandra x ️X

 

Parents
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    Hi Sandra,

    Welcome to Cancer Chat. I am sorry to hear about your recent diagnosis.You are doing well by trying to cope one day at a time.The first letter you received today wasn't so bad.. It is going to remove the cancer in your breast and give you the chance to live a normal life once all this treatment is over, so the sooner you start the sooner you'll be finished with it all. The second was a definite bonus.

    What surgery are you going to have - a lumpectomy or a mastectomy?

    I have had 2 bouts of primary breast cancer. The first was diagnosed 7 years ago and the second the following year. Have you got a treatment plan in place post-surgery?

    Please stay in touch. Remember, there is always someone here whenever you feel like talking.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

  • Hi Jolamine.

    Thanks for the reply. 

    I have 2 small lumps in my R breast (no one can feel them nor is there any outward change to be seen nor pain. Caught on routine screening).

    They are grade 1 and grade  2 both invasive cancers. On MRI my lymph nodes look clear.

    I am having a lumpectomy on the 21st as a day case. They are hoping to make 1 incision to get to both but will re assess on day. They are also taking 2 sentinel nodes for biopsy just in case. 

    After the op all things being equal I am to have radiotherapy mon to fri for 3 wks.

    Wow how matter of fact does it all sound in the written word when it is so not.

    7yrs post diagnosis - I tip my hat to you Jolamine. When we are first diagnosed it's like our lives ended in that moment. This is so not true "living with Cancer" never a truer word.

    take care Jolamine 

    Sandra x

     

  • Did you suffer from fatigue at any time 

  • Can you take anything for it I'm new to all of this 

  • Not really. It’s recovery, your mind and body takes a battering during treatment. When it’s done, if everything has gone according to plan, is when the recovery really begins as you’ll be flying solo, ie at home, no regular hospital trips. This is how it was for me anyway but every one goes through this in different ways. You might not have any major problems and sail through it. 

  • I just fall asleep when I'm sat down when I finish work I'm so tired just want to sleep my op isn't till next month x

  • It’s hard. It’s not just what’s happening to your body, it messes with you head as well. I found sleeping at night was a problem so was nodding off at strange times as well. 

  • Ye I'm finding it hard to sleep on a night to then wake up weird times of the morning doesn't help when I'm on late shifts at work x

  • Morning peeps 

    re yr query about fatigue:-

    I don’t know if it was because I was retired so work wasn’t hanging over my head ( and more importantly the financial implications that went with it) but I never felt particularly tired or fatigued. 

    Don’t get me wrong when 1st diagnosed I felt like - well....,like someone had suddenly removed all the bones in my body.

    I found this site the next day. Everyone was saying don’t google, don’t think ahead, live each day as it comes, keep busy..... they were right. I followed this this brilliant advice and....it really and I mean really helped. Pretty much there nd then thought ...ok let’s look this in the eye nd stare it down!

    Everyone is different of course but for me this attitude to it “all” worked for me.

    Each day when I went for my radiotherapy while in the waiting room I always chatted to the others sitting waiting for their turn ( only occasionally saw the same people). At some point I always asked how they were feeling. Some said tired, some a bit tired, some fine no tiredness at all ( this one was me too even by the end of treatment  I was... fine). So...everyone is different- it’s why we always say “well for me - or my experience was”. Here’s to your experience being as positive as possible me dear. We are here for the good days and of course the darker bad days. Just know however u feel we are here for you . X

     

  • Thanks Chrissie. Yes am just gearing myself up for it. Been told I will be in overnight and needing a week off work to recover so am working on that at the moment. Have pre OP booked in so it's just sit and wait now. Although I feel quite strong I've had an outbreak of eczema on my eyelid and torso of all places and have a stress muscular shoulder blade pain. I'm also not getting an uninterrupted nights sleep. But I think this is just the physical reaction to the shock of the initial diagnosis. Im actually surprising myself as I always thought I'd go to pieces if ever diagnosed with cancer as my mum passed from cancer (bladder) when I was 24. Onwards as they say. X

Reply
  • Thanks Chrissie. Yes am just gearing myself up for it. Been told I will be in overnight and needing a week off work to recover so am working on that at the moment. Have pre OP booked in so it's just sit and wait now. Although I feel quite strong I've had an outbreak of eczema on my eyelid and torso of all places and have a stress muscular shoulder blade pain. I'm also not getting an uninterrupted nights sleep. But I think this is just the physical reaction to the shock of the initial diagnosis. Im actually surprising myself as I always thought I'd go to pieces if ever diagnosed with cancer as my mum passed from cancer (bladder) when I was 24. Onwards as they say. X

Children
  • Hi there Cornishpasty  ... not looked on here for awhile. . ... as knew Sandra and jolomine was looking after you all ... but just wanted to say will be thinking of you over the next few weeks ... i know its a lot of highs and lows ... its not a bad thing to have a few tears sometimes ... we all get them days .. but you got the boxing gloves on, ready to take him all the way down this journey of ours ... I've got to have a few little lumps out under scar around same time ... we can do this xx

    It really does help ... it's like standing up to the bully .... I'm really proud of you ... you go girl ...

    Will pop back every so often for updates ... big hug Chrissie

  • Hi Chrissy

    How do you keep doing it again and again?

    I had a dark day yesterday (sounds a bit dramatic as I'm stage 1). I sat and spoke with my partner about practicalities if things get worse over time. He was really not wanting the conversation but I am such a practical person that I can't settle without having plans in place to ensure he and my 8 year old will be ok. As such I'm thinking of moving some money around for a worse case scenario fund. Today I'm questioning myself as this doesnt feel like im being optimistic, positive and strong....which is what I want to be. What a ride this is huh!

  • Hi cornishpastie

    Sure [@Chriss]‍ will b along soon.

    In the mean while just wanted t say - No mistaking it you have been side swiped out of nowhere. Having a “bad” day is totally normal so don’t b so hard on yourself. 

    Nothing wrong  with looking at all practicalities... some things just should b in place regardless. I’m grade 2 but when I was diagnosed didn’t have a will - I do now:-) let’s face it my will should have been in place anyway - u know the old “might get hit by a bus” scenario :-) 

    I didn’t focus on the practicalities of my treatment... I literally obsessed on them. Bless the lasses who supported me on here throughout my obsessions were my rock ( thank you ladies- you know who u are).

    The endless questions on what to take with me on op day ( I mean really it’s - slippers, dressing gown nd kindle) seriously the amount of me t you t me t u questions.... yup obsessed with the detail:-) again... thank u lasses.

    Guess it was my way of dealing. Whatever your way is then what the hey you do whatever it takes.

    x

     

     

     

     

  • Thank you Sandra. It caught me by surprise as I've been quite positive all through so far and it shook my partner that I wanted to have that conversation. 

    Yes I'm starting to obsess on the right pyjamas etc as will be in overnight. Any tips would be appreciated on this lol xxx

  • Careful ... floodgates cornishpastie floodgates;-)

    Reckon 2 things to remember 1. It’s a bit like being dropped on the edge of an abyss looking down ( being phased and scared is normal) 2. You will be stepping back from the edge to live your life with those you love and care for you. 

    Now u have triggered my dormant obsession :-) Wear clothes, pyjamas nd underwear that you can get into easily ( just in case you are a bit tender). So pyjama top that goes on like a cardi nd front fastens. I got a couple of seamless, front fastening, wire free bras ( support without digging in nd easy to fasten). See the trend here- easy to put on nd comfy. 

    Ask away on anything you are unsure of. We are all here t help:-) x

  • Ha ha Sandra you made me laugh. Right pulling myself together again. 

    I hadn't thought about front fastening bras!!!! Huge tip. Thank you....front fastening everything here I come!

  • Just jump in here as well, if you have some bbq tongs around, keep them handy for when you get home. Useful for reaching out to grab stuff without overstretching your arm for the first few days. 

  • Oh that is a good tip. Can I ask how long it took for you to recover. I've had to give work a rough timescale and I've said a week off. They know this is flexible and understand why and aren't putting pressure on me. But I have a stressful job (social worker) so am out driving to visits and carrying files, lots of note taking and typing up of assessments. Let alone the occassional angry person. I want to be realistic but also want to get back asap after for normality. 

  • I went back to work after two and a half weeks. The docs at the hospital signed me off for two weeks straight away. I worked half days for two weeks, my boss insisted I didn’t overdo it and then back full time until radiotherapy mid point. I worked half days for the last part of treatment and then for me fatigue really kicked in. I was off for a month after treatment finished. 

  • Thanks Rileyroo. I do wonder if I'm underestimating the time I will need off. To complicate things only my close colleagues know so being in here and there is likely to cause lots of questions. I think I will play it by ear and not put anything in my diary for a few weeks post surgery just in case.