Probably because I don't know how!  Give me a clue what to do. Caz

Hi girls, Annie you re funny, it's bad enough coping with a man when you're married to him never mind when you're not!  With everything going on I forgot to ask about the foot, when are you getting your own computer?   Julie, I have Harry coming Saturday for four days, he's seven now but loves to be on the go all the time, then he goes and Alfie amd Ella arrive a few days later. The trouble is we try to keep up but our bodies say NO!   At least when they all go I'll have three days to recover before my own celebrations start.  Fancy not wanting to be on the television,  we could all see who we're talking about!  The plumber has been and we have water coming out the taps now, yippee.   Having swept all my lawn, Norman my neighbour came out with his leaf blower, I wish he'd said as I would have left them,  talk about sods law.  I used to enjoy cooking but I'm finding it more of a chore because there are so many things he's gone off since chemo.  Anyway girls,signing off now, speak tomorrow. X

Eh Carol I would just love to have hubby back, aye even with everything that comes with them.!!! Sorry am just feeling a bit sorry for myself, it was his birthday last week, he would have been 64. Everybody tells you that things get easier but sometimes I wonder, maybe because in the early days you expect family occasions and anniversaries to be hard but you get through them. Now 2 years down the line it is all so real, here I am and this is my life now and it  is bloody hard at times.

Still like to read your blog, some good laughs mixed in with much sadness and frustration that cancer brings. Warm wishes to all Lynne x. 

Oh trust me Lynne & would miss him so very much but as you know by now  this is a true version of cancer life.. So the last twenty four hours have been interesting!   I'm shown where the stop *** is and the little valve that the plumber needs to drain the system, told that the drain is under my plant pot (oh so that's what that big metal lid is!)  And then he disappeared to the golf club.   So I ignore the information  and sit down having been so busy.  An hour later his back, all the power lines were down at the golf club so it was shut.  I cook his tea, leave mine as the plumber is coming.  When he arrives hubby starts giving me instructions to pass on to him, so I get cross and say if he's a plumber he should know what he's doing, no need to get nasty he huffs!   Half an hour later we have taps, running water and he's left.  How far has he turned the stop *** on I'm asked, for God's sake get off your backside and have a look yourself, I'm sick of running around, he looks suitably guilty and I finally get my tea by 7pm.  So today there's water pouring out the overflow and the toilet has gone belly up!!  Another phone call and I'm told to look in the garage for a ball *** set, I have to put the light on to see and end up with the cord and pull in my hand because it snapped!  So off I go again get the ladders out to put the new one up and I can't thread it through the hole, finally I cover it in nail varnish, let it dry, the plumber arrives again and it's worse than what we thought.   Hubby goes up on his stair lift which promptly stops half way up, so none of us can get up or down. I really could do with a handyman in the cupboard that would be so easy to get out when I need him!  So I love my man but he admits he's pretty useless and I drew the short straw in the long run.  I agree, we have a laugh and let's hope that's it for today. See you tomorrow 

Just another day at Fawlty Towers!!! Bless you Carol.x

Hi Ladies,

Annie, How many sessions of hydrotherapy did you have?  I have been going for a couple of years now, usually twice a week, and it does help but can take a while before you notice any real results.  When I don't go for a few weeks or over the Christmas break when they close, you do notice a slight decline.  Neil doesn't usually have any problems when he has done his tax previously, so not expecting any this time, it just that I still can't find everything I need to get it done.  I'm going to have to talk to his boss and get a duplicate group certificate.

Julie, That is one of the joys of Grandkids, when we get tired we can can hand them back to Mum and Dad.  I babysit my grandson every Tuesday afternoon, and while I love it, it's tiring, and I'm happy when Dad to get him.  He's nearly 9 months old and it feels like he weighs a ton.  Most of the meals I cook are for 4 people so I get lots of leftovers.  Only occassionally do I cook something that just serves 1 meal.

Carol, You'll have just enough time to recover before your Birthday celebrations.  You do need a handyman in the cupboard with the day you've had.

Lynne, I'm dreading Christmas this year, It's going to be so different.  I have told the girls I'm not having Christmas this year,    Have only just put the Christmas tree away from last year as Neil couldn't pull two of the pieces apart, they would be the biggest pieces so it wouldn't fit in the box, and has been undecorated in the loungeroom.  I'll get Nick (my son in law) to put the lights up outside.  Like you this is my life now.

Take care all, Lots of love.  Sue xx

Julie, I just realised I forgot to say how I coped, basically I didn't!   I went to work but apparently I was useless according to my workmates. Every hour seemed like two and it was a long day, but I don't think it would have mattered what I did, the girls stayed South and that meant I didn't have to spend all day worrying about them worrying about me.  Its like a day in the life of cancer, you cope!   

I suppose like everything else to do with this vile thing, there is no right or wrong way to deal with it!  But thanks for the response.  Best not to think too far ahead... I'll deal with it nearer the time.

Anyway, Dave's coming home on Friday! The op won't be for another 3-4 weeks and he's finished the antibiotics (I know, they said it would a 4 week course...) so he can come home until the op date.  I may not get chance to post much while he's home as we share this iPad, but I'll be back girls, and you will all be in my thoughts in the meantime.  

I can't wait for him to be home but I've kind of gotten used to being home alone so I'm sure we'll clash a little as we readjust to living under one roof again!  Wish me luck!

Julie

ps Carol, enjoy your big birthday celebrations and look forward to hearing all about them! Xx

Good luck Julie, we'll miss your posts.  Very exciting to get Dave home you can feed him up.  Yes there will be friction, just go and scream into your pillow!  I've learnt more swear words over this past year than I ever knew and I worked with the bad lads!   Grab the I pad while his dozing in a comfy chair,  lots of love to you and I'll definitely let you know how it goes.  Xx

Will do and thanks again for helping me through this difficult patch.  I've got till Friday....x

Hi all.  Sue, I almost rolled on the floor laughing when I read about your two year hydrotherapy.  I had five half-hour sessions - this is hydrotherapy National Health Service style.  No wonder I didn't feel any improvement!  Actually my ankle/foot is not too bad during the day but it doesn't half hurt during the night.  I usually end of hanging my foot down the side of the bed as that seems to help.  I just cannot face trying to interest someone at the doctor's surgery about it.  Actually I need to contact them anyway.  I had a vaginal prolapse a couple of years ago and got sent to the local hospital who inserted a small white ball-type thingie to keep everything in place.  Everything is still in place (or feels like it) but I have started getting a discharge so I need to get it looked at.  It is so difficult getting through to the doctor's surgery on the phone "You are number six in the queue" and this goes on for ages but I need to speak to them - I only need to be sent back to the hospital I should think.  Julie, hope all goes well with Dave at home.  Much love to all; life has its ups and its horrible downs.  Annie

Hi all.  Sue, I almost rolled on the floor laughing when I read about your two year hydrotherapy.  I had five half-hour sessions - this is hydrotherapy National Health Service style.  No wonder I didn't feel any improvement!  Actually my ankle/foot is not too bad during the day but it doesn't half hurt during the night.  I usually end of hanging my foot down the side of the bed as that seems to help.  I just cannot face trying to interest someone at the doctor's surgery about it.  Actually I need to contact them anyway.  I had a vaginal prolapse a couple of years ago and got sent to the local hospital who inserted a small white ball-type thingie to keep everything in place.  Everything is still in place (or feels like it) but I have started getting a discharge so I need to get it looked at.  It is so difficult getting through to the doctor's surgery on the phone "You are number six in the queue" and this goes on for ages but I need to speak to them - I only need to be sent back to the hospital I should think.  Julie, hope all goes well with Dave at home.  Much love to all; life has its ups and its horrible downs.  Annie

Hi girls, I've been to zumba today and we did a breast cancer awareness week so all in pink and photographer taking lots of photos, if I can I'll post one so you can see what we do!  Nothing has broken today and my lovely neighbour has cut my back lawn for me so very happy.  Hubby has gone to Richmond hoping the power is back on.  He's still struggling badly with arthriths in both hands and wrists that he has been left with, obviously the immune system is attacked by chemo and his hasn't recovered well.  I must admit it did feel like Fawlty towers here this week but the old saying, everything comes in threes rang true.  I think hubby realised he'd pushed mea bit too far over the past few days and sort of apologised in a roundabout way, without actually apologising!  I'm u sure you girls kwow exactly what I mean!!  Anyway I remind him that Harry and Tugs are homes Saturday as he forgets easily, then Faye and her two,  I thought everyone had left home, he comments,  we seem to not have empty nest syndrome,  just half empty nest syndrome he states.  What can I say, they all love coming home, lots of older parents never see their children,  we should count our blessings, I got an eyes to the ceiling and a rictus grin in reply.   Keith and June have just popped round, she has early onset dementia at our age, we tried to go and see them but they were never home.  Keith has had to put her in a home for a week as she had a water infection that sent her into free fall,  trying to climb out of Windows, running  into the road and being totally out of control,  Keith looks thin and under a lot of pressure,  life is cruel sometimes,  we all worked from age sixteen, bought houses, reared children and saved for our retirement and within a few years were dealing with cancer,  dementia and loss of other freedoms, It's a wonder we don't all go mad!  Well on that cheery note, I'll see you soon. X

Hi everyone,
Julie, That is such good news to hear.  I'm sure once he gets home and his things have been unpacked it will feel like he'd been home all the time.  You'll be fine.

Annie, I was referred by my Dr initially to have hydrotherapy, so I had those, I think it might have been 5 sessions, then I started swimming and found my knees improved,  Then after we moved here, once the remodelled pool opened I found they had 4 classes a week of aqua balance, which is held in the hydrotherapy pool, so I joined and go to 2 classes a week usually.  Most of us that go have either had or waiting for knee/hip replacements.  We have all been going for quite a while, and all of us have found the classes help.  You need to speak to the Dr and get checked.

Carol, It would be a relief that nothing has broken today.  With a bit of luck you'll be right now, if you've had your three things go wrong.  Somebody else's turn now.  Yes, I'm sure we all know exactly what you mean with regards to the apology without actually apologising.  I'm sure you and Norman love them all coming home as much as they love coming home.  It doesn't seem fair that at our age when we should be enjoying life that we have to deal with all these cancers, dementia and the like.  

Love to all, take care.  Sue xx

Hi Annie

do get your undercarriage checked out!  My mother in law has a prolapse (not sure if it's vagina or bladder) and she has a band which is changed every six months.  It works well for her, although she hates having it changed, it's only a five minute job.

Julie

You are so right Carol, I know lots of people who don't see their children as much as they want to.  I'm having coffee tomorrow with a friend whose 3 sons live in London.  Yes she sees them and her grandchildren quite often, but it means they spend half their lives on the motorway going down there to babysit during school holidays etc...It's lovely your family want to come and stay. 

Ah yes, the apology that's not really an apology...!

So sad about your friends.  

Still not sure if hubby's coming out Friday...it's all gone a bit quiet.  Will keep you posted.

Julie x

Hi Sue

How are you sleeping?  

I'm sure we will settle back into our routine after a day or two!  I just hope he can cope with Matilda for three days next week.  I committed to that before we knew he might be coming out!  He says he will be fine so I'll have to believe him!

Julie. X

Hi girls. Been reading all your news. Not been too good since my chemo ended. Overjoyed that I am in remission but still not much energy and got awful aches in my back, shoulders and my limbs. Think my arthritis has gone into overdrive . At least that’s all I hope it is. Got so worried and low. In tears most days . Really silly and weak I know. Trying to pull myself together and get out a little bit more. All day in the house not good. It’s hard to keep pottering when feeling achy but I’ve got to get out of this self pitying . Oh sorry I sound pathetic don’t I . I thought I’d be overjoyed at being in remission but although I am very grateful I don’t feel as happy as I should. You are all going through or have gone through dreadful stuff I know so sorry to go on. Sending you all lots of love and hugs xxx

Hi gloden

You are not silly, weak or pathetic.  I think it's only natural to feel achy, worried and low at the end of treatment. I expected to feel elated but felt alone and scared, and, under pressure to feel that everything was OK!  It's a sort of anticlimax I think.  Do try to get out for a walk if you can, enjoy the autumn colour and you might feel your spirits lift if only for 5 mins, it's a start.  The way you're feeling is totally understandable.  Don't try to be brave, have a good cry if you want, a few glasses of wine with a good friend, whatever works for you.  Feeling better will come gradually.

Much love

Julie x

Hi my girls, I think we are all coping marvellously with all that life had thrown at us.  Gloria you are doing so well to be in remission,  how good is that?  The problem is that you cope with the bad stuff then think you'll be alright but it takes time to get fully better.  Hubby was like you with terrible aches and it was awful to see.  In the end he had a blood test and he was anaemic so not enough oxygenated blood circulating , he needed a blood transfusion which worked so get a blood test, if you haven't had one.  I think we feel slightly abandoned after treatment and left to our own devices.   That is why this forum helps so much, we support each other and use our experience of cancer to help each other .  Annie, I didn't get round to replying to you as I now have a few on private messaging and because they are cancer based I've answered them.  So I hope you get your nether regions sorted!  We all have our own health issues because we're not twenty anymore! ! So let's carry on supporting each other daily,  living as good a life as we can and love each other.  Love Carol xx 

Hi Ladies,
Julie, Sleeping is getting better slowly, at least I'm no longer waking up every 2 hours.  Usually go 5 or 6 hours before I wake now.  Hopefully Dave will be fine with Matilda there.  Neil coped really well with our 5 1/2 year old twin grandsons (only for a visit) who are very boisterous and loud.

Gloria, Don't beat yourself up over how you feel.  Not having been in your situation, I can't add anything but what both Julie and Carol have said sounds like good advice. Give yourself time to recover.  I did see what radiiation/chemo treatments did to Neil and it was brutal.

Carol, That's the worst part about aging, health issues,  At least mine are minor when compared to cancer.

Take care, love to all.  Sue xx