I was diagnosed with Cancer in March and although we knew it was Cancer its still a shock to be told it. I have had 2 chemo cycles now and have my 3rd at the end of the month. I would love to chat about the chemo side affects to anyone..
My name is Laura and I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer in December. I am up to my 3rd chemo on Feb 28, A Little nervous because I will probably lose the rest of my hair. My second treatment I was tired for 3 days and was not able to sleep, probably because I was taking nausea medicine. Now I am feeling just great.
I too lost my hair the first time around as I was on carbo/taxol, it didn't bother me though. It does now as I had lovely red hair and it grew back grey and curly, my curls have gone now as I have my hair cut every 4 weeks so it is now straight. I miss my hair though..
It is the steriods that keep you awake after the chemo which is such a pain.
Are you having the 6 cycles and are they going to operate ?
My heart went out to you reading your message, you do seem to be carrying a lot of troubles on your shoulders and need to talk to someone so who better than us lot...Can I ask why a nurse from the hospice is calling on Mary, I myself would feel quite alarmed to be honest if someone came to see me. ( Or is she a friend as well )
I think you should take a few steps back and think that when Mary was first diagnosed how you coped and when the treatment started how things improved. You even managed a holiday abroad something I have always felt too weak / ill to do. So whatever is in the letter remember the Dr's don't always get it right and their are lots of people with cancer that are still here when they really should not be.
They are still giving all of us treatment and until the day comes when they say I am sorry but we can't do anymore then we will fight it. I have had 5 cycles of chemo my last on the 13th Jan only to find out that it hasn't worked. I have to start another 6 cycles of a very aggressive chemo and I am dreading it, but I am doing it because I don't want to die just yet.
So John take each day as it comes and wait and see what happens, and please try and take it easy as you won't be helping Mary if you become ill from stress.
John, Eileen has said almost exactly what I was going to say - you cannot take it all on your shoulders or you will be heading for a breakdown and where would Mary be then? By all means be strong for your closest family, but surely you are allowed to cry on a good friend's shoulder, why do you have to be strong for everybody?
Of course you can always let it out here, but we can't hold you and give you a hug, unfortunately - though I'm sure we all would if we could!
I think today must have something about it, as I haven't felt very well either, nor has my partner.
Tomorrow is another day, John, as the saying goes.
Sorry to see your not very good today, what is wrong ? xxxx
After I sent John that message last night, I thought after was I to blunt in saying it. But he works and looks after Mary so in my opinion he is taking on far to much. As you say he needs a hug. He should go for a few glasses of wine with a friend male / female and offload. I was telling my partner last night in bed and he said yeah I know how he feels, he agreed with with me. My partner is new and we have only been together 9 months but he is the most amazing man I have ever met. He makes me laugh and treats me like a queen but I know it is hard for him to see me suffer so god only knows how John feels as him and Mary have been together for years.
Jackie we need your help so hurry up back online. She is the wise old ( even though she is the youngest )
Anyway Hazel keep warm today and hope your feeling better soon.
I'm not so bad today, thanks - it's just that now and then my poor old squashed bowel won't work properly ( I think you know the feeling?!) and I get so bloated that everything is pressing on everything else and the pain is quite bad non-stop until I can go to the loo again. I sometimes wish I never had to eat again so that my insides could have a good rest! Anyway, I"ll try to stick to a liquid diet today - Complan, soup etc - which is almost as restful for the old insides, but I do like my food so it's a blooming nuisance!
Re. your message to John, I do think he needed to be told to let go a bit - typical bloke, has to try to be strong, when no true friend would mind if he let it all out now and then and had a good cry.
Have you decided whether you will go for your new chemo on Thursday? I really, really do hope you're feeling well enough, Eileen - keep us posted, anyway.
Aw well you certainly don't look ill, in fact you look very good...
Yes I do the the feeling about the bowel. I have taken 1 imodium this morning as I am sick of going to the loo and just doing nothing really, anyway I took another one before as I need the bowel to stop going into spasm before Thursday. Have you tried sitting over a bucket / bowl of hot steaming water ? It helps to get the bowel moving but be careful not to burn yourself... I wish I had a bidet as I would fill it full of hot soapy water and wait and see ? It would be so comfy...My problem is the same as you, the tumour pressing against the bowel but I had bowel trouble since I can remember ( always going and never constipated ) it has been the brunt of my life. I have been eating smaller meals as well, but like you I love my food. I am praying that this next chemo will do something to ease it because I have no quality of life, never been able to go anywhere.
It is Friday my chemo starts and Thursday for the picc line and bloods to be done. I got mixed up with the dates with it being February...
Anyway Hazel I have babbled on a bit so shall go. Please try the water thing but be careful..
Gordon Bennett, Eileen, the things we have to do! I might try the hot water method next time, but I don't want a burnt bum so I can't sit down when I go to chemo next week!
So you are going for the new treatment then - thank goodness, and let's hope you can get through it OK.
Thank you so much for listening and caring, it means a lot, and I don't think you were blunt at all just very supportive. All of you Ladies know what it is like and can understand. Yes I should be talking to someone occasionally, I may ask my sister for a chat.
You're right, Mary has been fortunate to feel well enough to travel last year, and I do count our blessings. I guess it's because I haven't seen her as uncomfortable as this for so long it starts getting to you. When she is in pain or upset, it is hard to take or know what to say.
I understand your reaction re the hospice lady but it's not what you think. She works for the hospice of St.Francis and does home visits as much or as little as people want. They can advise on all sorts of things from alternative therapies to financial advice, and they organise discussion groups for sufferers and carers if they wish to attend, but no pressure to do any of it. As soon as people hear the word hospice they assume that's where they may be headed, but it's not like that at all.
I explained to Mary that the oncology team were quite relaxed about her condition, if they thought it was really serious they wouldn't have made her wait 3 weeks for treatment. She agreed she was probably reading too much into the hospice lady's expressions.
I am actually looking forward to Thursday, we'll be hanging around the hospital most of the day, bloods, clinic, chemo, but hopefully it will make her feel a bit better than she does at the moment.
Reading your latest posts gave me a laugh, if the advice works that's great, but I now have to get the image out of my head of you two both sitting on a bucket of steaming water! PLEASE be careful!
Bless you both and thanks again,
John
xx
PS - Have put a photo of Mary and I on my profile page, new years eve (awaiting moderation)
Had my third treatment yesterday and it went very well. Three more to go. I have been taking my nausea pills. May feel tired in the next day or two, then I will feel great a few days after. Hope all is well with you.
