Hi everyone its been a long time since Ive been on AGAIN because the computer has been playing up AGAIN and its made me very  . could do with a new one but this time of year its an expense we can't afford! I've been reading back a few posts but it will take me forever to catch up so wondered if you could all just update me on how you are all doing!! Its lovely to be back in the community I've been on a bit of a rollercoaster last two months and am waiting for the straight jacket to arrive lol!! Seriously does anyone else get really angry!! My anger has been uncontrollable at times with me even smashing a wall and it has really upset me!!

Please be intouch

LOTS AND LOTS OF LOVE TO YOU ALL

Louise

Hi Louise

Sorry to hear you are having problems with your computer and your emotions.I dont get angry because I find it just leaves me feeling worse in the long run,plus my last treatment has damaged my heart so at the moment I cant get stressed.Waiting to see the heart specialist in 2 weeks and when he gives me a magic pill I will be fine.You have been through so much for so long.Can you have some sort of therapy or a massage or reiki treatment to help?Being on here should help to unload so rant away and let us help.No more wall hitting!!!

Stay strong

Rose xx

Dinky,

Absolutely stunning...I just looked at the facebook gallery and you look great...As an ex skinhead, I have a thing for ladies with shaved heads which some may think is a bit weird but hey each to their own. Those wigs are amazing too! My hair as a bloke has started to fall out although not so you would notice and I would love to know what to do...I tried a baseball cap on the other day but it just didn't look right so will have a look about...I cant see me wearing a wig.

Lee,

I love your photo, never got round to telling you that but I have now x

Leonie,

Yes I am certain I would be most offended if you all met up and didn't invite me along too...I live in Matlock but now I have a new sporty motorbike will make the excuse to go anywhere for a bit of a trip!

Caroline,

You really are struggling darling...imagine us all around you giving you a big group hug soaking up all our energy and making you feel better...make sure you comeon here and talk more so we can try and help you through this.

Much Love to all you stunning ladies out there...

Tony xxx

Hi Everyone

Firstly I would like to say I am glad we have heard from you Caroline, I was so worried as you have not been on for a while and you always use to post on here. I am so sorry you are going through a bad time I know you have not had it easy, if there is anything I can do please let me know as we are all here for you to rant at if that is what you feel like doing. PLEASE let us know how you get on tomorrow. Like Tony has said imagine we are all giving you a VERY BIG HUG.

Tony glad to see you are writing on here again, I was getting a little worried about you, how are things going I do miss our chats lol.

Dinky you look fab in your photo the scarf really suits you, I would never of been brave enough to put a picture on here as I was really down when I lost my hair, eyebrows etc but now they are all coming back as I finished Chemo in October but I do understand how we all feel when we have lost it as it is what we think makes us as a woman.

Well I have had to contact my breast nurse today as over the weekend I was really down just crying for no reason, I think now that my treatment has finished it has finally hit me and what with my marriage break-up during my treatment it was like I have had a double wammy so I think it may be time to speak to somebody, wish I had done it sooner really. Just sitting here I could cry and I know they say it's a good thing to do but how much can you do it but not feel any better. I will let you know how I get on as it might help a few other's who knows.

Well take care everyone and speak to you soon

Love to you all

Littlesis

love the photo very chemo chic

Hi Dinky

You look amazing in the photo an insperation to every one.

Thanks for sharing it

Luckyus

hi rose n ladies

im so pleased to hear your heart is ok n you dont need to see the specialist now. thats just great news. i was so sad when i read you didnt think you would be here at christmas, you just make sure you have the best one ever. lots of love to you.

i still have most side affects unfortunately. doctor thinks they wont go til i finish treatment now. i didnt realise that herceptin stops you from healing. my legs are much better than on chemo but still hurt. i get about though. its my arms that stop me now. right one from meds n left from op n fluid build up. ive got lymphadema in my op boob which is really sore n swollen but it goes round to my shoulder blade. got to go back to the nurse n get it massaged. trial nurse told me i have 3 treatments left n then i can start healing. cant wait for my nose to heal along with the rest of my body.

i went to see my bc nurse today as i didnt get any answers from the doctor(he said pain was from chemo). she is so good at her job n told me what was wrong n what to do. i told her about my wonky boobs n there was a lady doing fittings n i got a new boob today! im so chuffed with it. the first time with even boobs. sorry caz, i dont mean to be insensitive. i hope you got some answers today n they can start to make you feel better.

hope all you ladies are doing well. littlesis i hope you get your app soon, i think its time for someone to give you a hand. then you can go on your 2 holidays n show that rat of a husband you dont need him in your life. survivor you look so good in your pic. didnt look half as good when i went to mine but felt heaps better. tony, let us know when you are feeling well enough next year. lots of love to you.

love leonie xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi all been catching upon u all

dizzy love the pics i too have mucked about with fun wigs scarfs and more make up but dnot look as good as u pics fab u have inspired me to do hair journey album to i think it will be something to look back on when this is over to see how far we come xxxx

Littlesis u have had so much to contend with but the girls are right conselling will help u see light and give u new start please remember we are all here for u xxxxbig massive hugxx

rose- so glad u feeling bit better have fantastic xmasxxx

lonie so sorry u having all these side affects hope u get all the help u need thinking of u xxx

caz so glad to hear from u like everyone eles was worried hope u got some answers xxxxxx

sara how u doing ?xxx

tony hope all well with u xxx

to everyone eles thinkin of u

i had my 5th chemo of 6 on monday feel bit rubbish today but dertermined to get organised for xmas cant wait for it to be over and say good riddance to 2010!!! my eldest comes back from liverpool at week end (weather permitting_)so looking forward to seeing her want them all to have fab xmas after all we have been thru xxx love and hugs to all xxxxxxxxxx

Hi everyone,  As always you inspire me. I love the look chemochick, perhaps i should be a bit braver and try some makeup, and hey, I will even post pics. Lets start a trend. So lovely to hear from you caz although I am so sorry to hear you are still having a rough time. Gosh I could say something to each and everyone of you but I'd be here all night!  I have my 3rd chemo tomorrow - and hope to change the meds. Last time i felt so miserable, not suicidal but so low that i had real concerns. The funny thing is it does say that that is one of the side effects, and the anti nauesua drugs says nausea is one of the side effects. Mmmmm ?

Having trouble sleeping lately too, but seem to have lifted the depression a little. Got my daughter over tomorrow - only last week i had a down day when she came and hardly saw her, this time looks like i will be either asleep or a zombie, it is five past five in the morning right now!

I just wanted to call in and say thank you to you all for always inspiring me and making me feel that i am not alone. I have mostly good days but on the bad ones it is to all of you i turn as i really do feel that only you here understand. The family are good but it is not the same as knowing someone really does understand. I have been wearing the new turban with a liner as the little stubble is still falling out, eyebrows are very thin. I haven't worn the scarfs with them yet, but thought maybe i would be brave and venture to chemo with the turban and scarf and a little makeup. I have not yet stepped outside the door without the wig! But as always, you have all inspired me and small steps i hope will lead to bigger ones. anyway, i should be thinking yipee half way through the chemo (nearly!). Radiotherapy worries me more ! The usual five weeks and then an intensive whole breast. I just wondered if anyone else had had this particualr regime.

By the way Tony, your words about bald women - I heard something similar from antoher guy in the week. Sinead O'connor - she's a beauty, so maybe there's hope! Thanks again to you all for your encouragement and sharing your experiences with me.

Love to you all, and Caz, thank you for your words, good luck at the hospital, give them hell! And we will all be thinking of you.

sara x

hi all just come on for a moan hope u dnot mind

had 5th chemo monday feel really rubbish being sick despite anti sick tabs so tired and tearful hate givin in to this, thought i had managed to fight it all way.

i want to do all xmas stuff and make it lovely for my lovely family but not able to do everything i usually can. i know everyone understands but i dnot want this i want to b my ususal manic self!!

sorry just ranting my husband is working away for few days and breaks his neck to get back for me its not fair. my daughter hates seeing her mum unwell but is so brave !i hate what this is doin i feel i am letting everyone down they all keep saying how brave and strong i am but i am not i feel weak and stupid for not being able to keep goin !!i know chemo is nearly over but i want it finished xx

sorry to go on but i dnot want to do this to family and friends xx

thanks to u all for being there xx

love and hugs nina xxxxx

Hi All.

I know I pop up here, now and again with odd comments, but reading the various posts about hair loss, make up etc, reminded me of a major turning point with my partner, Sarah's "look" during and after chemo.

Firstly she was(and still is) nutty and will try anything. She wore the 70s "stuff" in the 70s, in the 80 big hair, head bands, leg warmers, rolled up sleeves and so on took over the look over. These changes carried on. Changes here and there. Then the news of breast cancer last year, then the op, chemo and her hair fell out. She thought her world had fallen apart. She had hats and mad colour scarfs, as posted about earlier, but one day we were in a waiting room, flicking through various mags and she came across a photo of fashion model Amber Rose. She banged the mag on my lap and said "see that. I'm going for it!"

Sarah is not 6 foot tall, but boy did she grab the inspiration. Have a look ladies. Please. It might give you an idea or two.

Remember also the "Look good feel better" program!

Take care.

RD

http://amber-rose.org/gallery/

Hi everyone!

Uhmm interesting topic...like everyone here..mine is secondary breast cancer spread in the pleural of my lovely lungs! I had chemo 2 years ago and my gud feelings thinks i will have more next year.Is a tough journey for everyone...partners,family, friends...I just hope they find a cure for every single cancer. I dont call it cancer ..i call it..."small C", Is so many topics that i can talk about this subject from trying to find a new job living with small c, to check ups and ct scans, hormone medications, etc I am a fighter like everyone here..but sometimes we have blue days....We need to keep being positive guys and I think this is why i coming here too..doesnt matter if i get scared of the b c words...I thinking to start to write a diary but i am lazy...at least for the past 6 months but i am going to try to back to be the active person that i was before...will see....

Hi everyone!

Uhmm interesting topic...like everyone here..mine is secondary breast cancer spread in the pleural of my lovely lungs! I had chemo 2 years ago and my gud feelings thinks i will have more next year.Is a tough journey for everyone...partners,family, friends...I just hope they find a cure for every single cancer. I dont call it cancer ..i call it..."small C", Is so many topics that i can talk about this subject from trying to find a new job living with small c, to check ups and ct scans, hormone medications, etc I am a fighter like everyone here..but sometimes we have blue days....We need to keep being positive guys and I think this is why i coming here too..doesnt matter if i get scared of the b c words...I thinking to start to write a diary but i am lazy...at least for the past 6 months but i am going to try to back to be the active person that i was before...will see....

Hello and welcome to the place no-one wants to be.

Have you tried writing a blog.If you go onto other topics i will try to bring it to the top .It is really helpful to read and keep note of what you have gone through.Are you on treatment now?

Keep posting .

Rose xxx